


The Aftermath

by Kingaj1631



Category: Euphoria (TV 2019)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Drug Addiction, F/F, F/M, References to Depression, Teen Angst, Teen Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-10
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:00:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 68,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21744148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kingaj1631/pseuds/Kingaj1631
Summary: The ever spiraling lives of Rue Bennet, Lexi Howard, Nate Jacobs and Jules Vaughn only ever get worse... even when they seem like they're getting better. Rue has just overdosed for the second time and she simply doesn't have the will to live. Lexi is coming to terms with her feelings towards a certain someone, which may or may not end up with the both of them being heartbroken. Nate has never been more conflicted in his life, how will his life change due to these recent events? Jules may or may not be realizing that running off to the city in the middle of the night is not a good idea, is it too late to go back? Join me in this wonderful journey of teenage angst and pain, will these kids ever find happiness? Let's find out.
Relationships: Rue Bennett/Jules Vaughn, Rue Bennett/Lexi Howard, Rue Bennett/Nate Jacobs
Comments: 33
Kudos: 167





	1. The Hospital

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is my rendition of how season 2 would go, please keep in mind that this has taken a lot of careful thinking as I wanted to display a realistic version of a great show. Please feel free to leave any comments as i'm always looking to improve.
> 
> Rue has landed herself in the hospital again, and this time she doesn't know if she'll survive it. Everybody rushes to Rue's side but will it be enough?

**INT-HOSPITAL-NIGHT**

We see red and blue lights, slowly its revealed to be an ambulance. This ambulance speeding towards the hospital, carrying Rue, the girl who has overdosed twice now in one year

**RUE (V.O):**

_I know what you’re thinking, what the fuck Rue, what was the point if you’re just going to go back to square one… and you know what? I agree, why the fuck did I even try?_

The ambulance arrives and two paramedics escort an unconscious Rue hurriedly into the ER. Rue’s mother is following close behind, void of a reaction, how could this have happened? Why is this happening? Everything seemed fine when Rue left to the formal with Jules so what happened? Oh god what happened?

**RUE (V.O):**

_For a solid 3 months I thought I had a chance, that this was “a new chapter in my life” as my mom once said. But here we are, back to the beginning of my shitty life, and I have no one to blame but myself_

We see Rue getting signed in, her panicked and confused mom can barely reach into her purse for her insurance card when she grabs something else. A memory from Rue’s first visit to rehab, a cute little bracelet Rue had to make for “bonding” or whatever the hell the person said, the sentiment was there though. Leslie calls Gia, who in turn calls Lexi who’s still at the dance so she tells everybody else.

**RUE (V.O):**

_Honestly the most awkward part about an overdose is the people who feel sorry for you. People who would never understand the isolation you feel, the pain you’re in, what caused you to be a fucking idiot and snort that last pill you had in your room hidden away for “safe keeping” when let’s be honest, I knew this would happen. Deep down I knew Jules would leave, I just couldn’t admit it. Fucking Nate Jacobs knew it._

**INT-WINTER FORMAL-NIGHT**

Now Lexi is still drunk off her ass so “Rue’s in the hospital” probably sounded like

**LEXI:**

_Guyssss Ruesss in the hosssspitall_

Cassie and Maddie both react to this in very different ways

**CASSIE:**

_What? Is she ok? Ask Gia which hospital we’ve gotta get over there_

Maddy however doesn’t even hear Cassie shout out this information until they’re almost out the door, she’s still burying her face in Nate’s chest.

**MADDY:**

_Wait what? What do you mean Rue’s at the carnival? That was months ago_

She also didn’t hear Cassie CORRECTLY, so Nate has to be the translator

**NATE:**

_She said Rue’s in the hospital, we should go_

_Why the fuck does Nate Jacobs care about Rue? Maddie thinks to herself, she’s in the middle of breaking up with him for the 5th and final time and Rue fucking Bennett decides it’s a good time to do whatever the hell she did_

**MADDY:**

_Why the fuck do you care about Rue? Aren’t you two like enemies or something?_

Nates doing everything right now to not lose his shit, this is exactly why he’s tired of her shit, even though he’s the reason for a lot of it

**NATE:**

_Maddy can you just shut the fuck up and let me drive you over there_

Maddy really wants to say something to him but she realizes that she has literally no other way to get there, she’s high/drunk off of who knows what, so she accepts. Texting Cassie, Maddy is able to find which hospital and barks orders to Nate, she figures this is the least he owes her, and he hasn’t said anything in like 5 minutes which is kind of weirding Maddy out but whatever. She texts Kat but no response so great, she’s probably slutting it up with the next big dicked celebrity or whatever the fuck she said.

**INT-HOSPITAL-NIGHT**

Rue’s in a hospital bed finally after what seemed like hours, she wouldn’t know though, she’s still unconscious, her brain fried by whatever the fuck she stole from Fez’s grandmother.

**RUE (V.O):**

_You know what I said about picturing hospital vents as a warm summer breeze and all that shit… well fuck that, hospitals are like the least comfortable place to be unconscious in. Why couldn’t I have overdosed somewhere else? Where nobody could save me? I honestly don’t see the point if you’re just going to put me in the runner up for coffins._

Leslie is still trying to process what’s happening, I mean what were these past 6 months? what happened that could have caused THIS? Oh god maybe its Jules, it has to be. Lesly decides to call David to see if Jules is home, he picks up almost immediately.

**DAVID:**

_Hi Leslie, you left your stuff here in a hurry is everything ok?_

Everything is clearly not ok but maybe he genuinely doesn’t know

**LESLIE:**

_No everything is not ok David, Rue just got admitted to the hospital, she overdosed again_

An audible gasp can be heard by David

**DAVID:**

_WHAT? I thought she was doing fine. Jules told me she was 3 months clean. What the hell happened?_

Ok, David clearly doesn’t know, Leslie needs to find out where the fuck Jules is

**LESLIE:**

_Funny you should mention Jules, where is she by the way? Last I saw her she was with my baby girl going to the Winter Formal._

**DAVID:**

_Same here, here I’ll call you back im gonna check in on her_

The phone hangs up before she can say anything else and Lesly is left alone, scared for Rue.

**INT-ETHAN’S CAR-NIGHT**

Kat and Ethan are in the middle of a heated, overdue make out session.

**RUE (V.O):**

_The only plus to come out of this REALLY shitty night was Kat found true love. Not some fuckup with a big dick, not some weirdly rich guy with a dick the size of a tic tac, but true love. Ethan was everything Kat didn’t realize she needed._

Kat finally feels the vibration of her phone only to see it being blasted by like half of the school, or at least the people she knows. She reads the text sent collaboratively: Rue is in the hospital, come quickly. She doesn’t even know how to respond, they didn’t exactly know each other that well yet Kat felt it was her responsibility to be there, like how she should have been there for Maddy.

**KAT:**

_Hey um can we put this on hold? My friend just got sent to the hospital and like, I’ve been a really shitty person lately, so I really need to—_

Ethan simply smiles and interrupts Kat

**ETHAN:**

_You really like blue balling me huh? (Laughing) I guess this is a much more pressing matter than before though, let me drive you there_

They’re both seen smiling as the pair drive off, unaware of Rue’s situation.

**INT-HOSPITAL-NIGHT:**

Rue is still unconscious, and still uncomfortable. Gia is the first to arrive, tears rolling down her face she asks her mom what happened. It scares Lesly to realize that she doesn’t have an answer. Words attempt to formulate but nothing comes out, they simply must wait for a doctor to come in.

**RUE (V.O):**

_Honestly, I wish I could’ve just told them myself, but my body was not having it, one overdose is one thing but two? That’s like going into war, then asking to go right back in after losing a leg. Ok bad analogy but you get it._

Lexi and Cassie are the next to come in, lexis still kind of drunk but she’s still clearly upset, whatever Lexi isn’t expressing Cassie definitely is. What the fuck could have happened? Jules was acting strange during the Formal but then again, she always acts strange. The sisters embrace Leslie and Gia and unmeaningly tells them.

**CASSIE AND LEXI:**

_Everything is going to be ok_

Even though they have no idea if everything is going to be ok because Rue is lying unconscious in a hospital bed and nobody knows what the fuck happened. Kat and Ethan just so happened to be close to the hospital, so they get there next.

**KAT:**

_Oh my god what happened? You didn’t tell me it was this bad_

Leslie can’t help but cry at this point, seeing all of these clueless teenagers she’s never seen before entering her daughter’s hospital room is a lot. She doesn’t know who these people are to Rue but she clearly means something to them if they’re all here. Gia leaves to get some air, she’s already seen her sister in a hospital bed, she knows what this is but she’s too afraid to tell anybody, she was the only person to see Rue like that.

**GIA:**

_I’ll be back, I’m going to go see if I find a doctor_

This catches Leslie’s attention

**LESLIE:**

_I’ll go with you, girls, stay put keep an eye on Rue. I really appreciate you all coming here tonight_

As the mother and daughter exit the room, they pass a couple bitching at one another

**MADDY:**

_I bet we’re the last ones to get here, why the hell were we driving so slowly?_

Nate is barely remaining calm here, but he has to, ever since that meltdown at his house Nate’s been afraid to show any emotion like that.

**NATE:**

_Maddy… I’m pretty drunk right now so be glad we got here at all_

Maddy brushes this off, sighing in anger, she rushes over to Rue’s room to meet everybody else. Nate remains at the window of the room, too afraid to enter.

**INT- RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Lexi has snuggled up right next to Rue, taking the seat closest to her naturally, Cassie is basically sharing the seat with Lexi, just as concerned. The other seat that has been provided is being occupied by an awkward Kat, Ethan is standing right beside her

**ETHAN:**

_So, uh. can you give me the run down on who this Rue is? Like why the fuck she’s lying unconscious in a hospital bed?_

Lexi’s too fucked up to even try to answer that long-winded story, so Cassie gives it a shot

**RUE (V.O):**

_Ok so like, you know this story for the most part, girl meets girl, they fall in love, except girl 2 had no idea what the fuck to do with her sexuality so it led to various acts such as (and not limited to): Weird sex with middle-aged men, going off to “the city” and getting high and falling in love with some girl who doesn’t even appreciate her the way girl 1 does but… shit I’m rambling aren’t I? I tend to ramble when I’m high, even in my mind_

All we see is Ethan’s shocked face, this overload of information is just a lot to take in, hell Kat didn’t even know this much and its shocked her as well. Maddy is the first to speak

**MADDY:**

_Well where the fuck is Jules then? You notice how the love of her life isn’t here? Come on guys its obvious it had something to do with her_

Nate, who’s still standing uncomfortably close to the window, can hear all of this, he doesn’t even know how to process this, I mean he said all that shit about Jules leaving and all but he never actually expected her to do it, not now anyways. This upsets Nate, not because the girl he fell in love with is M.I.A but because she did something so horrible, he could be 2nd place for once. Leslie comes back with Gia in tow and notices the tall figure of a boy standing ominously close to her daughter’s window and questions him

**LESLIE:**

_I’m sorry but who are you? I don’t remember my daughter being friends with Nate Jacobs, you know, the boy who strangles young girls_

This statement hurts Nate a lot more than he expected, what the fuck did he do to himself? Did all of that head banging really make him empathetic? He genuinely feels bad when he hears this

**NATE:**

_I... uh... hi Ms. Bennett, I drove Maddy over here, I’m sure you saw us bitching at each other on the way to Rue’s room. Maddy being the loud one... anyways I’m staying out here for a reason, look I know what has been said about me and honestly, you’re probably right, but I know Jules, I’m probably the reason she’s missing honestly._

This just confuses Leslie

**LESLIE:**

_How the hell do you know Jules? And what the hell did you do now?_

Ok seriously, the whole showing empathy thing is starting to really annoy Nate, he can’t think straight now

**NATE:**

_Let’s just say I have a history with her, look I can leave if you’d like, I’m going to ask around, see if anybody saw anything about what happened, I know I fucked up and I want to help the best I can._

Leslie is still pretty confused about what’s going on but at this point she doesn’t care; she just wants her daughter to wake up

**LESLIE:**

_You may remain right where you are, if you truly mean what you said I expect some answers young man_

Nate obediently goes back to the window he was stationed at, getting on his phone to presumably do some digging. Leslie and Gia go back into the room, she sees that all of the girls are upset, they clearly know something she doesn’t.

**LESLIE:**

_Ok, seriously, what the fuck happened tonight?_

**INT-TRAIN-NIGHT**

We see a dimly lit train, brightened only by the phones of the passengers still awake. Jules happens to be one of them, and she couldn’t be in a more conflicted state. Texting Ana, she lets her know she’s coming to the city and should be there by morning, Ana replies with a simple heart emoji and “can’t wait to see you again”. Jules however doesn’t know what to feel, she just left her best friend in an emotional wreck at a fucking train station in the middle of the night... alone, oh my god was has Jules done. She then switches conversations, texting Rue, trying to apologize, trying to reason why she left, she didn’t want to leave but there was just too much to handle. The pressure with Nate and Tyler and Maddy and Rue and oh my god there’s way too much to think about, all she knows is she’s going to call Rue tomorrow and tell her she loves her.

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Leslie, having been caught up with her daughter’s adventures, sits down. She sits down and tries to process all of this; no wonder Rue was so depressed. Maddy again tries to talk first

**MADDY:**

_Look Ms. Bennett, we truly don’t know what happened but I’m like 90% it has something to do with Jules, I mean she’s literally the only person who isn’t here._

Before the conversation can go further the doctor finally steps into a room of panicked, emotionally drained women... and Ethan. He explains that Rue should be fine, the dosage she took was too much, which led to another overdose, but it wasn’t bad enough to put her in a coma this time, realistically she should wake up by tomorrow morning. He hands Leslie pamphlets that are all too familiar and sighs, clearly seeing the pain Leslie is going through. He tells Leslie

**DOCTOR:**

_The decision is yours but personally I would admit her to a rehabilitation facility, this time for a longer visit_

Leslie is at a standstill, she has absolutely no idea what to do, if she puts Rue in rehab again, she has no guarantee this won’t happen again but if she just takes her home who the hell knows what might happen. She thanks the doctor and Gia goes to hug her again, this time the girls join in for a clustered group hug that ends with Lexi falling over.

**LESLIE:**

_Is she drunk? You know what forget it, I’m going to give you all a pass for tonight, you’re all welcome to stay for the night, I think we could all use some rest though so I’m going to shoot home and grab some blankets, Gia come with me._

Gia somberly follows Leslie close behind, still processing that her sister overdosed AGAIN. Maddy leaves next so she can get some air and Kat decides she should follow her. Cassie decides she should call their mom and tell her they’re going to be staying at the hospital tonight, so she goes the opposite way, passing Nate. This leaves a drunk Lexi and a confused Ethan. Ethan decides he should go for a bit

**ETHAN:**

_Hey so umm I’m gonna go get some snacks for the girls, I’ll be back._

Ethan passes a sleeping Nate and tries to find the closest vending machine. Now we’re left with Lexi, a very drunk Lexi all alone. Nobody could tell but this has impacted her the most, I mean my god she’s known Rue for such a long time she doesn’t know what a Rue-less life would look like. Its here where her true feelings come out

**LEXI:**

_Rueeeee, you betterrr not die on me, I fucking love you... there I said it, I’m in love with you Rue Bennettttt. Howard and Bennettt can’t go on as a solo ssshow, so please don’t you die, I don’t knowww what I would do if you did._

At this point Lexi has succumbed to the liquor and passed out, she’ll be out cold until tomorrow morning where everybody will greet her with lukewarm coffee and stale toast.

**EXT-HOSPITAL-NIGHT**

Maddy and Kat exit the hospital together, trying to process what the fuck is happening

**MADDY:**

_Did I tell you Jules fucked Nate’s dad?_

Ok seriously what the fuck, Kat has literally experienced more plot twists tonight then your average soap opera.

**KAT:**

_I’m sorry what? How the fuck do you know this?_

That’s a question, how the fuck does Maddy know this?

**MADDY:**

_The last time I went to Nate’s house we got into a fight, he was all freaked out about what I said, you know with all of those dicks on his phone? Anyways he stormed off and I noticed this weird fucking cd in one of his books... I knew this wasn’t right because I never once have seen Nate read._

**KAT:**

_And?_

**MADDY:**

_And I took it home, it was a tape recording on some old camera, Nate’s dad was fucking Jules, making her swallow his thumb and some other weird shit but still._

Kat seriously has no response to this

**KAT:**

_Do you think that’s why Jules is missing? Maybe she ran off due to the scandal of it all?_

Maddy thinks about it but her drugged up mind just can’t process this all

**MADDY:**

_Maybe, I don’t know I’m going to have to seriously talk with Nate about this whole situation, anyways I think we should check back inside with them._

**INT-OUTSIDE RUE’s ROOM-NIGHT**

Nate wakes up after realizing he dozed off at all, how the fuck did he fall asleep with all of this shit going on. So far, his searching has gotten nothing, Jules has just vanished off the face of the earth. All Nate knows is he’s got to fix what he’s done, starting with Rue. Nate gets up and heads to the doorway of Rue’s room

**EXT-HOSPITAL-NIGHT**

Kat would love to go back inside but there’s something she needs to get off of her chest.

**KAT:**

_Look before we go back in, I need to apologize for everything. I know I’ve been a total bitch lately and honestly; I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I promise I won’t be that Kat anymore, Ethan’s a really great guy and I have finally realized that._

Maddy is starting to cry, she’s never been apologized to like this before.

**MADDY:**

_Oh my god bitch stop you’re going to make me cry, of course I forgive you! I could never hate my Kat_

The two hug and make up, finally resolving any tension the two had between each other.

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

The empty room is almost peaceful, minus an unconscious, drugged out Rue and a drunk Lexi, but they’re both asleep and that’s all that matters.

**RUE (V.O):**

_Ok so waking up is often the hardest part, you have to wake up your entire nervous system just to open your eyes but that’s besides the point. But you do wake up, you expect to see a concerned family, especially my mother being the woman she is, she’d probably scold me. But anyways, who I woke up to on that night was not who I suspected._

As Rue finally regains consciousness, she’s greeted by the last person she wanted to see right now

**NATE:**

_Hi Rue... how are you feeling_


	2. The Apology

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything is not ok, Rue's awake though so that counts for something! Nate is trying to figure out who the hell he is and Kat plans a date.

**INT-ANNA’S ROOM-MORNING**

Jules wakes up in a fit of terror, the nightmare she just had scares her deeply. We don’t know exactly what it was, but it clearly had an effect on Jules. She turns to go to Rue… except this isn’t Rue’s place…. Orrrr Jules’ so where the fuck is she? Oh shit, that’s right: Anna, she got to the city at like 2 in the morning, makeup still stained by the events of the Formal, and Anna was right there, to comfort her. Jules’ thought she never felt this type of compassion before, her drug-using, groomer-eque lover seemed like the best option after leaving. Of course, the tears turned to making and out and well… you know the rest, so here Jules is, waking up in a familiar stranger’s bed. All the moving around managed to wake up Anna, who’s immediate reaction is to check on Jules

**ANNA:**

_Whats the matter babe? Did you have a nightmare?_

_Babe?_ That sounds weird, and not in the good way

**JULES:**

_Uh- um yeah sorry, I’m still trying to process everything_

Anna smiles that wide, seductive smile that makes Jules feel like everything is ok, the same smile that greeted her when she exited that dreadful train

**ANNA:**

_Aweee its ok, I’m gonna get up and make some pancakes, you want some?_

Pancakes? What the fuck is Anna her mom or something? No Jules doesn’t want pancakes she’s having a pre-life crisis, her best friend is who the fuck knows where, oh my god how is her dad going to react? How is everybody going to react? Is Rue ok?

**JULES:**

_Yeah sure, I’ll have some_

Ok Jules is not the best at handling this type of shit, she’s had anxiety her whole life but holy shit if it isn’t the worst it’s ever been. Jules puts some clothes on and meets Anna out in the living room, where several drugged-out, 20-something year olds are passed out, holy shit that party was wild.

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-MORNING**

Status update: Rue is not ok. She’s thrown up 3 times within the last hour and she feels like it will never end. Nate ran off in a hurry after last nights “talk” or whatever the fuck that was, Lexi is also puking her brains out but that’s because she’s an alcohol virgin and her system does not agree. On top of that, Rue is depressed (I know what else is new), but for real this time She doesn’t know what the point is. The love of her life, the one person who managed to make Rue smile in the darkest of times, the light in her life… is gone. She’s not coming back, Rue could tell that by the pained look in her eyes, Jules made that decision to leave long before Rue suggested it, all she did was give her the push.

**RUE (V.O):**

_Honestly, I don’t blame Jules for leaving, all that shit with Nate and Tyler is just waaaaaaay too much for somebody like her to handle. But fuck me it still hurts, it’s like living the ending of Titanic, I’m Rose and Jules just let go, except I don’t think I’m moving on._

When Rue isn’t throwing up, she’s crying, crying not just about Jules but for her family, she can’t believe she just put her family through this again. She really did try to get better; she always knew she’d be an addict but with Jules by her side she didn’t need drugs to fuel the addiction. But, it’s different this time, Rue had to basically force herself to take that last pill, she truly didn’t want to she just wanted to stop thinking for a bit.

**RUE (V.O):**

_All I thought of that night was my family, I wanted to leave at first, but I couldn’t stop thinking about my mom, about leaving Gia, I couldn’t do that. I don’t know what the fuck my future holds now, but I’m going to have to get my shit together and get out of this uncomfortable bed_

Rue’s still struggling to speak due to the overload her brain experienced not even 24 hours before so basic phrases are pretty much all she can handle.

**RUE:**

_Lexi… water.. pllease_

Lexi lifts her head up from the toilet she’s been hugging for the past hour and gets up, vertigo is making her very dizzy and she almost falls over, but Rue needs her. Lexi successfully walks 10 feet to Rues bed and gives her a bottle of water. This water has to be the best tasting water she’s ever tasted, probably because all of the liquid in her body is basically gone but still.

**RUE:**

_Thank you.. Lexi… you’re the be---_

Rue’s sentiment is interrupted by the sudden urge to vomit out what she just put into her system, it’s like her body is punishing her for putting it through hell a second time. Lexi finally feels well enough to sit on the bed with Rue, the bed that smells like a drug addict just vomited on it. Lexi doesn’t care though, this is for Rue, although Rue doesn’t know it, Lexi would do anything for Rue, she doesn’t know yet if its love like she drunkenly admitted but its definitely something she’s going to figure out.

**LEXI:**

_There, there Rue, its ok, get it all out, you’ll feel 100 times better, trust me I know_

Lexi never thought she’d be drunk, or at least not when she’s a junior in high school, dealing with her sister’s, best friend’s, and everybody’s else’s shit before she can even figure out her own.

**RUE:**

_I KNOW LEXI, fuck I’ve done this before, what the fuck do you know? You had a little ever clear last night, that’s all!_

Lexi doesn’t even know how to feel, even though this is clearly the drugs talking, it still hurts to hear her best friend/maybe crush yell at her, it always has.

**LEXI:**

_Jesus ok, sorry I didn’t realize the hardened drug user was such a fucking expert_

Ok maybe that was the wrong thing to say because Rue’s crying now, oh god she can’t stop. Lexi thinks it was her comment but its really the realization that this is what Rue’s life will be now, yelling at her closest friends, taking anger out on them is sooo undeserved but she can’t help it because what the fuck else is she supposed to do with her miserable existence now that Jules is gone?

**RUE:**

_I’m sorry Lexi, shit I don’t mean to be a bitch, but, she’s… she’s—_

Rue doesn’t even need to finish for Lexi to know what she’s going to say, Jules’ is gone, and Lexi can’t do anything to help her because she barely even understands her own feelings.

**LEXI:**

_I know Rue, I know, trust me she doesn’t care about you, not for leaving you like this. I hope she comes back so I can kick her ass myself_

This manages to get a chuckle out of Rue, mainly because she knows she really would, after this slight bit of happiness, Rue starts to hurl… again. This cycle continues for the next 20 minutes or so until she finally falls asleep, thank god. Lexi is left to comfort a sleeping Rue, when her phone goes off for the first time since last night, it’s a text from Jules.

**INT-NATE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

It’s the day before the Winter Formal and Nate has completely lost his shit. This isn’t your typical breakdown; this is 18 years of your life spilling out all at once type losing your shit. Nate doesn’t know how to stop, this confrontation with his dad has completely broken him, bottling up all these secrets, these lies… it’s too much for Nate. Seeing his father on top of him like one of those boys, taking complete dominance over him, terrified him. Nate has spent most of his life, bottling up everything, his emotions have always been as controlled as possible so he can achieve what he’s sought, but now what the hell is he supposed to do? He can feel his brain rattling after every slam, every scream tears his throat further until he can’t anymore. Whatever happens, Nate knows he’s not going to be the same person, how could he? Nate hated who he was, he hated that he had to threaten Jules like that, he wanted to hold her, to kiss her and live happily ever after, but that was simply not possible. Jules was a threat to his father, and as much as he hated his father, Nate had to protect his dirty little secret. But not anymore. Nate doesn’t care how his father will react, but Nate’s done being his vessel for all of his fucked-up acts. God, what the fuck is Nate doing? He’s managed to stop the head trauma, but his arms are still flailing wildly, and he thinks he broke part of the floor. Holy shit, he never thought he was capable of that. How long has he been at this? Where’s his dad?

**INT-CAL’S OFFICE-NIGHT**

Holy shit what has Cal done? Has he pushed his son too far this time? He was afraid of this. Deep down Cal knew that Nate knew, but neither of them wanted to admit it. This was Cal’s dirty secret, his shame that he hid away, locked in a drawer that Nate clearly knew how to get into. The noise that came out of Nate was primal, he’s never heard such rage, such sadness, such heartbreak all at once. Cal checks his CD’S again, double-checking to see if THAT one is still missing… it is, where the hell did it go? The only person that could’ve possibly know was…. Nate. Shit, he has to have it. The noises have stopped, that ended with what sounded like floorboards breaking, holy shit how strong is Nate? Cal knows this is entirely his fault, he should’ve said something earlier, it’s his fault Maddy got hurt, one person can only bottle up so much before they lash out. Cal has to go out there, he needs to apologize, try to make this right even though he never can. He needs to snap out of it, so he does. Cal finally gets up from his chair and slowly exits his office.

**INT-NATE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Nate’s finally been able to stop himself from destroying his room, he’s still freaking out though. He has trapped himself in the fetal position, holding himself so tight every vein in his body is exposed. Three questions keep flashing in his mind: How the fuck is he going to look his dad in the eyes after this? Is he going to make things right with Jules? He owes her much more than an apology, and the third and most shocking question is: Why the hell does Rue Bennett keep coming up? Every time Nate goes out to do something he’ll regret, Rue happens to be there, like the center focus of a story. She’s the protagonist and he’s the antagonist, always meddling in her life, it’s always indirectly, after he threatened Jules at the lake, shortly after Nate discovered she had fled to Rue’s. He could only assume the two found a romance between themselves as they were practically inseparable at that point, for the few weeks they had together. When he threatened Jules a second time, she sunk to a low he hadn’t ever seen before, he saw it 1st hand at the Halloween party, a fallen angel quite literally. He saw the look on Rue’s face when he glanced at Jules, a look of confusion that ended in realization. Rue knew what was going on, but she kept it to herself. Once he was done making out with Maddy for the 5th time he looked up and noticed Rue was missing, a sopping wet Jules was dancing haphazardly on her self-made dance floor, but her partner was M.I.A. He tried not to pay much mind to it, but it kept nagging at him, worse than Maddy does and that’s hard to do. Finally, he spotted the suit-wearing Rue, who grabs Jules and coerces her to go home, even Nate has to admit Jules has had enough. He can’t help but feel relief though, seeing Rue take responsibility and get Jules out. He’s always seen Jules as the one with a bright future, but she doesn’t handle stress well. Not to say what he has done isn’t worth freaking about but drinking yourself half to death is not the way to do it. Shit, he’d rather she punch him or something. Nate never directly went after Rue because he had no problem with her, she was one of the few who went to his parties but never kissed up to him, she went as she pleased and did as she wanted. Nate couldn’t help but respect that, and then she overdosed and well you know the rest.

Cal finally musters up the courage to enter Nate’s room, afraid of what he’ll see. To his surprise, a part of the floorboard is definitely broken, either due to his head or his arms it doesn’t matter. Nate’s crying now, like a lost soul. He’s never heard such tragedy come out of Nate, Nate was always the one to remain calm. Cal remembers Nate didn’t even cry during his birth, he just looked up at everyone with those cold, calm eyes of his. Cal has to stop his son from beating himself up, so he does what any good father should do, and he embraces him.

**NATE:**

_GET off OF me you faggot!_

Nate has practically lost his voice from that hellfire of a release not even 10 minutes ago. Cal knows now that he can overpower Nate, so he does, hugging him tighter.

**CAL:**

_I’m sorry son, this is my fault, this is all my fault I’m so sorry._

Nate finally gives in and returns the embrace, grabbing onto his dad’s back tighter than he ever has before.

**CAL:**

_It’s ok, let it out, you know... you’re a bigger man than I’d ever hope to be. Where I fell you rose, who am I to lecture you on leading? You’re the best fucking quarterback I’ve ever seen, and I mean that in life. You bottled up all of this for so long, all because your coach could never admit it._

Hearing this from his dad leaves Nate confused, is he really admitting to this finally? After all this time.

**NATE:**

_Dad I—_

**CAL:**

_Shh shh shh, don’t speak, listen, I’m going to come clean with this, I’m sick in the head I know that, all I’ve done is destroy this family from the inside, I don’t know how it took this long for me to realize it. I am truly sorry Nate, I love you._

This causes Nate to cry harder, he hasn’t heard those three words in who knows how long, he’s never been encouraged before by his father.

**RUE (V.O):**

_Nate told me later that he cried for another 30 minutes straight, to be fair 18 years spilling out in less than hour is impressive. I never knew Nate was experiencing such pain, it didn’t excuse him for what he did, but it gave me a reason to understand._

**INT-NATE’S ROOM-MORNING**

It’s the day after the Winter Formal and Nate feels like shit. Not only is he hung over from all the booze he drank but he’s still coming to terms with Rue’s overdose. Is this his fault? Is it because of what he said last night? Where the fuck is Jules? Holy shit was Nate right? Did Jules leave? He simply doesn’t know and that scares him. He doesn’t even know why he wanted to go the hospital last night, it was just out of instinct, like he knew he had to be there for some reason. He touches his forehead and realizes how hot he is, shit he might REALLY be hung over. When he puts his finger down he notices something shining, right on the tip of his fingertip, it’s a star. One of those glittery stars you see on young girls, but this one is from somebody specific. What the fuck did Nate do last night for one of Rue’s stars to end up on his forehead? How drunk was he?

**INT-KAT’S ROOM-MORNING**

Kat wakes up from the best sleep she’s ever had. She feels like a giant pressure has been lifted from her now that Maddy and her are on good terms. Sure, Rue’s in the hospital and that’s, like really fucked up but right now she’s focusing on herself and her boyfriend. Holy shit, she has a boyfriend. Kat almost forgot because of the shit show that was last night. Kat reaches for her phone only to see a message from Ethan:

**ETHAN:**

_Good morning beautiful_

Followed by:

_ok that was cheesy, good morning, how are you?_

And finally ended by:

_Shit, I really am bad at this, just call me when you get these please_

These three messages were sent within the span of 10 minutes. God, he’s so awkward. Kat loves that about him though, she used to be the awkward one, stumbling with her words but ever since her “awakening” as Maddy would call it, she feels confident and Ethan’s stumbling is simply adorable. Kat decides she should probably call him, make sure he hasn’t died from embarrassment

**KAT:**

_Hey, its Kat_

Ethan picked up almost instantly

**ETHAN:**

_Hey! You got my messages! Good I was afraid I got the wrong number_

God he’s nervous.

**KAT:**

_Nope, you got the right one! Hey, I know this is abrupt but do you wanna go get breakfast? I’m starving and I really need somebody to talk to._

There are a few seconds of awkward silence, Kat can tell Ethan is trying to muster up the courage to accept, she must be his first.

**ETHAN:**

_U.. um yeah! Yeah sure, meet me at Keke’s in 30._

How assertive, Kat thought, she definitely needed a little more time though.

**KAT:**

_Make it 60 and I’ll be there, I expect you there exactly an hour from now._

Kat can hear Ethan stumbling, but she hangs up before he can respond. She can’t help but laugh, she really has a boyfriend! And shit, she needs to get ready like now if she’s going to live up to her words.

**RUE (V.O):**

_Kat really had improved since my “incident.” I almost want to take credit buuut I think I might be pushing it; I just wish I found somebody like that sooner._

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-AFTERNOON**

Rue wakes up to her mother and Gia waiting patiently. They were waiting for her to wake up.

**RUE:**

_Uh.. hi_

Really? That’s the first thing Rue says to them after overdosing for the second time? Fuck, maybe she does have brain damage.

**LESLIE:**

_Hi yourself, how are you feeling baby?_

Like shit, Rue wants to say, but she also doesn’t want to worry her mother any more than she has

**RUE:**

_Honestly, I was puking for like a solid hour, so I think it’s out of my system. In fact, I think we can go home actually I—_

One look from Leslie is all it takes for Rue to realize she isn’t leaving any time soon.

**LESLIE:**

_Sure, but first you need to tell me what happened, you were making so much progress! And then you threw it away? WHY?_

Ok that’s fair, Rue didn’t expect a warm welcome

**LESLIE:**

_Does it have something to do with Jules? I just got off the phone with her father and he said she hasn’t gotten home yet? Where did she go Rue?_

**RUE (V.O):**

_You see, I was going to answer that, but I was interrupted by a dramatic entrance from a good friend._

Before Rue can answer, the doors of the emergency room open and a gurney is hurriedly being escorted to the operating room.

**PARAMEDIC:**

_Get an OR prepped now! We have a male victim, 23 years old, gunshot victim, he’s bleeding pretty badly!_

Now that got Rue’s attention, so naturally she turned and looked to see who it was. That’s when she saw it, Fez was the 23-year-old bleeding out currently on a gurney.

**EXT-LEXI’S ROOM-AFTERNOON**

Lexi had taken Rue’s phone after SHE texted her. Lexi had no idea what to do but she knew that Rue COULD NOT see the message. She was afraid that if Rue even saw that it was from Jules she would worsen dramatically. Thankfully, Rue didn’t even notice that her phone was missing, probably because when she left her mother was coming with the “I’m going to kick your ass” look. Lexi was going to start heading back to Rue now, she needed to make sure she was ok. But first she needed to handle this, so she did what she thought was right. Lexi deleted Jules’ message and headed out to return the phone, coming up with some bullshit excuse as to why she had the phone in the first place.


	3. The Plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why is Nate in Rue's hospital room the night of her overdose? Whats the matter with Maddy? Where's Cassie? So many questions!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This may be a tad on the boring side, but hold out! You are not prepared for what's to come

**INT-RUE** **’S ROOM-NIGHT**

**RUE(V.O):**

_Ok seriously what the fuck is Nate Jacobs doing in my hospital room? You may be asking that question due to my history with Nate and honestly I didn’t know either until he told me everything_

**NATE:**

_Um.. hi rue, how are you feeling?_

Rue doesn’t even know how to respond to this, she just wakes up from a self-imposed drug nap only to see her worst enemy greeting her. Is this hell? This has to be hell, and this is her torture.

**RUE:**

_Wha.. what the fuck?_

Nate looks at Rue like he never has before, he looks sympathetic, he looks broken

**NATE:**

_Look I know you can’t really speak right now so don’t try to; I know I’m the last person you wanted to see right now and believe me I understand_

Rue seriously has no idea what the fuck is happening, she was about to ask where Jules is, but Nate beat her to it

**NATE:**

_But I need to know, where the hell is Jules? Is this about her? Did I cause this? Please I need to know that much_

Were those tears? Was Rue Bennett making THE Nate Jacobs crying? Holy shit she didn’t know he could do that, you know, experience empathy.

**RUE:**

_Um… she left… train station_

Just saying those five words made them reality, it finally sank in that Jules was gone and so she started crying… again. Jesus Rue was a mess, she’s pretty sure she’s worse off than Nate though, at least he’s fully coherent right now. Although Nate started to look like he was going to breakdown, so Rue motioned for him to sit and he obediently listened

**NATE:**

_What? Wh- oh that’s why, did she say where she was going? We can find her, Rue at least let me do that…_

He was saying a lot, yet he knew it didn’t matter, looking at the devastation present in Rue’s face made it clear, there was no coming back. Nate had never looked so devastated to Rue; he never showed this emotion so what the fuck?

**RUE:**

_What happened to you?... you threatened me?... and now you cry?_

That only made it worse for Nate, his emotional whirlwind just peaked, and he broke, instead of showing anger he only showed grief. The grief that was on display was the same her mother had when she OD’d the first time, absolute. Rue couldn’t help but feel sorry for Nate, although she hated him, for a guy like him to cry like this… something was up, she reached for his face and wiped a tear. Nate was utterly shocked, he didn’t expect that, especially from somebody he tormented for so long.

**NATE:**

_I’m sorry, a lot happened….._

**RUE(V.O):**

_He explained to me the freak out he had before the dance, the fact that he truly loved Jules and that he was sorry. And you know, I believed him, this didn’t excuse him don’t get me wrong, but I couldn’t help but believe what I was seeing_

After that long and emotional explanation, Rue finally understood. She knew about Cal but for everything else to have been going on, for him to know? Fuck that was a lot to put on somebody. Rue understood that he was truly repentant, he only wanted to repair the damage, but she didn’t know if he could. Rue did what she thought was right and embraced Nate, resting him on her chest for a few minutes, it seemed to calm him down and honestly the weight from his head felt kind of relaxing so. Nate really did not expect any of this, but he was pleasantly surprised.

**NATE:**

_Thanks… I ah needed that, look I can tell your friends are going to be coming back soon so I’m going to leave before Maddy says anything. Have a good night Rue, I hope you get better_

That was the most genuine conversation Rue ever had with Nate Jacobs, even though she did like 5% of the talking, and she definitely never expected for any of this to happen. He left and Rue was left to her thoughts again, the most dangerous locale. Before she could really do some thinking she realized how sick she felt and reached for the nearest trashcan. She didn’t even realize that her glitter stars landed on Nates face.

**RUE(V.O):**

_Nate coming in to apologize to me was like number 1 on things most unlikely to happen, I didn’t expect for our talks to continue, but I didn’t know that this was just the beginning._

Lexi is the first to come back with Rue’s mom and Gia, all three are stunned to see her awake so suddenly but thank god she is. Lexi tries to help Rue, but she suddenly has to urge to vomit too, she runs to the toilet.

**LESLIE:**

_Oh my god Rue what the hell happened? I thought you were doing better?_

Those words stung like a blade, she was right to ask that, hell she thought she was doing better too and yet look at where she is. Rue couldn’t get a word out for hours due to the expulsion her body was going through, so they had to wait until it stopped.

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-AFTERNOON**

They tried waiting until Rue stopped vomiting but then Fez had to get shot. Honestly his timing was impeccable, kinda saved Rue from that awkward explanation… for now.

**RUE(V.O):**

_Fez told me what happened later, but I still couldn’t believe it, like I knew he sold drugs obviously but for him to get shot because of it? Fez was always tolerant of me, even when I was swearing and screaming at his front door he still considered me a friend, there’s not many people like that anymore._

Ok seriously could Rue’s life get anymore fucked up? She tries to get up but to no avail, you know she just recently overdosed right? Her mom looks at her concerningly

**LESLIE:**

_Who is that Rue? How did he get shot?_

That’s a good question, how did he get shot? Rue really doesn’t know how to describe her relationship with her drug dealer so

**RUE:**

_He’s ahh a friend… an older friend_

Leslie knows she’s lying but there’s not much she can do, Rue’s been through a lot and a bitchy mom is the last thing she needs to be right now.

**LESLIE:**

_Ok sure whatever, well he’s going to be in surgery for a while so while we wait can you please tell me what happened?_

Shit that’s right, she still has to tell her

**LEXI:**

_Let me help with that, she’s been through a lot after all_

Rue was shocked to see Lexi speak up for her, she’d been a really shitty friend to her, and she thought sending her home to rest would make her realize how terrible Rue was. Yet here she stood

**RUE:**

_Lex what are you doing here?_

**LEXI:**

_Helping your dumbass, that’s what (smiling) don’t do anything like that again or I will personally kick your ass!_  
  


This made Rue genuinely laugh, the first time since… fuck, Jules. Everything compared to Jules, her happiness, her sadness, all these peaks would never be reached again because of Jules. Rue really appreciated Lexi though because she didn’t know if she could talk about this without breaking down… again.

**RUE:**

_I’ll allow detective Howard to explain, she’s the only other person I trust right now_

That sad reality caved in for Rue, Lexi, her best friend that she mistreated ever since she met Jules, is now talking about Jules for Rue. What the fuck is Rue’s life.

**RUE (V.O):**

_Lexi explained as much as she could, more like as well as she could, I told you, I’m not the most reliable narrator. Nate had woken up that afternoon confused, he remembered the what but not the why, why did he go to me? Hell, I didn’t know that until way later._

**INT-NATE’S HOUSE-AFTERNOON**

Nate spent the day after the Formal confused, not only about what went down but emotionally confused. How could somebody so secluded, so resilient to any positive emotion breakdown so passionately. Then he remembered he was eating breakfast awkwardly with his father and it clicked.

**CAL:**

_How did the Formal go last night? How was Nadia?_

Ok yeah this is fucking weird, his dad’s actually being.. a dad

**NATE:**

_Her name is Natalie, and it went fine, I saw Maddy and everybody_

Suddenly the news gets turned up by Nate’s mom

**MARSHA:**

_Listen you two!_

Breaking news, Tyler’s face appears on screen, shocking Nate

**REPORTER:**

_This afternoon we have breaking news where police can confirm Tyler Clarkson has been arrested for the assault of Maddy Perez. Sources say—_

The rest of the broadcast fades away as Nate can’t hear it anymore, Jesus Christ he really ruined that guy’s life, what the fuck is the matter with Nate. He abruptly leaves the kitchen table only for Cal to follow shortly behind.

**CAL:**

_Did he do it?_

All it takes is for one unsure look from Nate for Cal to realize, he’s raised a monster. Without any response Nate goes up to his room, trying to stop himself from shaking. Holy shit Nate really ruined somebody, not like high school pettiness, because of him someone’s in jail. He needed to fix it, but he needed to speak to Rue, maybe he could knock out 2 birds with 1 stone.

**INT-KEKE** **’S-AFTERNOON**

It is exactly 58 minutes from when Kat last spoke to Ethan, and she doesn’t know if he’s going to show up. She was so fucking nervous, she was really meeting Ethan, the boy she dodged for weeks, for breakfast/lunch, brunch whatever. God why was she so nervous, literally like a week ago she was squeezing her cash pigs out for cash, saying all sorts of demeaning things to them. But then THAT one bought everything for her, and he was disturbed. It wasn’t the actions he requested that were disturbed, stripping is pretty relaxed compared to what he could’ve asked but that voice. He distorted his voice to the point it sounded other worldly, she could feel his eyes leering onto her body, she felt disgusted. All this overthinking caused Kat to space out, she didn’t even see Ethan sit down in front of her

**ETHAN:**

_Uh hello? Earth to Kat?_

That startled her, but she quickly relaxed at the calming face of her lover to be

**KAT:**

_Oh my god hi! Sorry I_ _’m still processing last night_

That wasn’t exactly a lie, what the fuck happened to Rue? She amongst their self-made group was the most stable, and that’s not saying much

**ETHAN:**

_Ha, you’re telling me, only reason I know all of this is because of you, I’m not complaining though, they’re all quite lovely (smirking)_

Kat decides to fuck with him

**KAT:**

_Oh really? You think they’re hotter than me? I can call them up and set you up if you’d like_

Ethan almost spits out the water he’s drinking

**ETHAN:**

_No, I uh meant that uh—_

Ethan sees the shit eating grin Kat has on her face and realizes that she’s just fucking with him. To avoid any further embarrassment he stops talking, Kat bursts out laughing

**KAT:**

_(Laughing) oh my god you should’ve seen your face that was hilarious!_

Ethan decides he has to muster up all the masculinity he has left and respond

**ETHAN:**

_Yeah, yeah, don’t forget I’m the one paying, let’s go get our food Katherine_

That was oddly hot to Kat, nobody called her by her full first name except like her parents, she liked it. The two go off smiling, holding hands, Kat can tell Ethan’s the one and likewise. They couldn’t be happier

**RUE (V.O):**

_Kat and Ethan were like the most wholesome couple we’d ever seen, they complimented one another so well. I just wish I could have experienced that; I mean I did but Jules didn’t. I was in love in her, and she just loved me._

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-AFTERNOON**

After that long-winded explanation from Detective Howard (with some assistance from Detective Bennett), everybody had to sit down. Leslie honestly was in shock… again, she’d heard only good things about Jules, and when she met her she seemed like the perfect person, appearances can be misleading apparently

**LESLIE:**

_Oh my god Rue I’m so sorry, I’m so glad you didn’t leave but were the drugs necessary? You said you were doing better!_

That hurt Rue the most, she didn’t want to ingest that line of toxins and hallucinogenic additives known as an illegal substance. She just needed to get out of her head, the encounter with Jules was engraved in Rue’s mind as she walked down that cold, dark and lonely street. Nobody was there to stop Rue, she had absolutely no reason to live, she believed that at least, the irony was that she thought of her family when Jules attempted to board the train with her; The image of her mother and sister being abandoned by their daughter/ older sister was heartbreaking. Rue made the decision to stay with her family, she put them through enough, sadly Jules didn’t share the same concerns and left. She barely even looked at Rue, she blinked and said

**JULES:**

_Ok_

And walked to an empty seat, never looking at her again. Rue seriously needed help, from her friends and her family, she knew that the only way she could get better was to do it on her own, but for now some help would be nice.

**RUE:**

_I know… I was, or I thought I was, Jules gave an ultimatum, to stop popping pills or she would abandon me. I decided to stop for her, and I realize now that was a mistake_

Rue finally remembered Fez and had to ask

**RUE:**

_Oh my god, how’s Fez?_

Leslie knew she’d ask

**LESLIE:**

_Fez huh? That’s a weird name for a 23-year-old. He just got out of surgery, Gia checked, and the doctors said he would be ok. The bullet managed to miss his vital organs, he’ll be in the hospital for a bit, but he’ll live, do you want to see him?_

Rue needed to make sure he was ok, so of course she said

**RUE:**

_Yes! Can somebody just help me up?_

Lexi of course volunteered, overestimating her strength. Rue wasn’t that much taller than her but when you OD you tend to lose certain motor functions, in essence Rue was dead weight to a little Lexi. After quite some time, Rue managed to shuffle her way to Fez’s room, terrified of how he’d respond. Rue didn’t know how to explain her relationship to him, oh hey mom this is my drug dealer! She decided she was going to touch on that later, she needed to make sure he was breathing, losing two of her closest people in 24 hours was not acceptable. Fez slowly opens his eyes to see a frail Rue, a supportive Lexi and a confused looking woman and her daughter

**RUE:**

_Hi Fez, are you ok?_

****

****

**INT-MADDY’S HOUSE-AFTERNOON**

What the fuck is Maddy’s life? She finally makes a triumphant decision to dump Nate, again, but still she was sure this was the last time; Except she didn’t feel right. That formal would go down history as one of the worst the school had ever seen, at least to Maddy. Kat got herself a man finally, Cassie was all independent and shit, and Rue? Rue was in a hospital, free of responsibilities. What did Maddy have? A massive migraine and a hint of regret. She hated Nate, but she couldn’t get him out of her head, she could feel the tears coming from his eyes when she was breaking up with him, she was just too afraid to say anything. That was the most Maddy had ever seen Nate upset, sure he cried but she knew he was faking it to get sympathy. This was different though, those tears were genuine, another thing she was well acquainted with, she was just better at hiding it. Another thing that irked her was where the fuck was Jules? Jules was everything Maddy wanted to be, she just never admitted it to anybody because that would be weird. Jules was carefree, she conquered femininity as she said, it’s ironic that somebody like Jules had such a better handling of the female body than Maddy, but again that wasn’t any of her business. Maddy knew what she had to do, she was going to get all of the answers from the source, she was going to question Rue.

**INT-KAT’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

Today was the greatest thing to happen to Kat in a long time. She went on a date, which seemed like nothing to her because she had sex with several dudes, but this was different. Ethan didn’t just see Kat as an object, he appreciated her for who she was, and she loved him for it. Oh my god she loved him? All of these feelings just rushed to Kat all at once and it was way too much. All Kat knew was that she needed it to never stop, she was going to his house tomorrow actually, his parents wanted to meet her. Kat was freaking out, she definitely had clothing but everything she owned was slutty as hell (a difficult time in her life for sure), she needed a new wardrobe. Tomorrow Kat was going to get some normal clothes.

**INT-CASSIE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Cassie meant to go check on her sister and Rue, but she decided to let her younger sister handle it. She knew Lexi was practically in love with Rue, I mean come on it was obvious, so she figured this was her chance. Cassie had spent the entire day in her pajamas, laying about and watching shitty reruns of shows she didn’t even like; Her mom did though, and she wanted to spend time with her mom. Everything was going fine until she got the text, the text McKay sent her 3 hours ago and was too afraid to check it until she was in the safety and seclusion of her bed. It simply read “ Hey, are you doing ok?” It was sweet but it was also from McKay, the same boy who couldn’t show up when she needed him the most. She couldn’t even repeat the phrase, it was the most horrifying thing she ever went through and the supposed love of her life was too busy to check on her. So, she ghosted him for a few days… until the formal happened and because everybody had something dramatic her’s was McKay. Cassie really didn’t know how to respond so she just stared at the screen, contemplating what she would say

**EXT-THE CITY-NIGHT**

Jules had no idea where she was and that was not ok. After spending the entire day wondering when the fuck Rue would respond to her, Jules decided to go out partying. Which was normal to Anna, that’s all she wanted to do, Jules had nobody else at the moment, so she decided to follow along. Is this how Rue felt? Following somebody just because she loves her, no she can’t love Anna, she barely knows her. But she told Rue she did, so what the fuck does Jules want? Does she want to conquer femininity like Anna said? During that rave Jules hallucinated Rue and she said this wouldn’t end well. What the fuck is the matter with Jules? She’s seeing people now? She honestly was freaking the fuck out right now, she had no idea what she should do, Rue wasn’t responding, and she was too afraid to call her dad so… shit her phone just went off. Oh, shit her dad is calling, she doesn’t really have another option, so she picks up.

**JULES:**

_Hi dad! What’s up?_


	4. The Ship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Rue still in the hospital, what is Lexi going to do? Is she just going to exist solely for Rue? Cassie is unhappy with how Rue has treated her and a girls night out is planned. Nate is still figuring out stuff

**EXT- THE CITY-NIGHT**

Well that was awkward, how does one explain a situation like the one Jules is in? Her father just called, asking where the hell she was, and she couldn’t tell him. Not that she didn’t want to but she legit had no idea where she was, so she said the city.

**DAVID:**

_Why the fuck are you in the city? Do you even know what you did to Rue?_

What she did to Rue? What the hell does he mean? Jules is about to ask but her phone service must have cut off because he’s no longer on call, fuck. This is starting to be one hell of a night for Jules, this explains why Rue hasn’t responded though, what the hell happened? Anna turns around only to see a stationary Jules

**ANNA:**

_What’s the matter babe? Who called?_

Jules needs to figure this out, on her own, so she makes something up

**JULES:**

_Uhh, just a telemarketer, nobody important_

That was a terrible lie, Anna shouldn’t believe that

**ANNA:**

_Oh ok! Don’t worry I get them all the time too, well come on slow poke! We’re gonna miss the show!_

Jules completely forgot, Anna was making her go to some LGBTQ show, to express her sexuality or something like that.

**ANNA:**

_Let’s show you what it’s like to be a part of a community_

As nice as that sounds, Jules hated plays, shows whatever the fuck they’re called, either way they were so boring. Jules could never just sit still for a couple of hours and watch people act out ridiculous scenarios, she didn’t need a show to make her feel LGBTQ, I mean for fucks sake has anyone seen Jules? Nate of all people noticed the moment he met her, why is she thinking about Nate now? Jules was afraid to go to drug-induced raves anymore because of her lover/enemy. Jules still loved him, even knowing what he had done, and that scared her, this is like some beauty and the beast shit, except she doesn’t know who’s the beast. Jules knew what she had to do tomorrow, she’s gotta call Rue, make sure she’s ok.

**INT-FEZ’S ROOM-NIGHT**

**RUE (V.O):**

_Ok so note to self, when your drug dealer/friend/ whatever the hell just got shot, take it slow. I made the mistake of going to see him the day after my incident, so I obviously was still fucked up, Fez was also messed up. Except he was a different kind of fucked up, like a bullet in the gut fucked up. I should’ve waited because he freaked out like I’d never seen him before, telling me to get the fuck out, wow now I kind of know how he felt during our last argument._

Rue, after a failed attempt, enters Fez’s room again, this time by herself. He’s still sound asleep when she enters so she decides to wait.

**INT-LEXI’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Lexi hadn’t slept in 28 hours, she counted them as she had a lot of time to reflect. How could all this crazy shit have happened in such little time? Lexi seriously needed to sleep, otherwise she would be useless to Rue and that could not happen. The only other person who knew Lexi had feelings for Rue was Cassie and she was sworn into secrecy out of fear of getting suffocated by a pillow. Cassie laughed it off, but Lexi was serious, Rue couldn’t know, not yet anyways, she’s been through too much. God why can’t Lexi sleep? Maybe because she’s laying here, over thinking every little thing she’s ever said to Rue. Did she know? Does she like her too? No, that one had to be no, she literally almost killed herself over Jules, that’s love, albeit toxic. Lexi was going to keep her feelings to herself until she could figure this all out. There was one last thing she needed to do before she went into a coma, she needed to check on Cassie. Ever since the abortion Cassie has been acting reasonably different, she just wants to make sure Cassie is ok is all

**LEXI:**

_Hey Cass, everything ok?_

Cassie gives her that wide grin she’s known for, the mischievous kind

**CASSIE:**

_Of course, I’m fine! I should be asking YOU that question, hooows Rue?_

OK Cassie could be a bitch sometimes, but Lexi still loved her

**LEXI:**

_Ugh she’s fine, as fine as she could be anyways. I’m just afraid that I did something wrong_

Cassie looks at her younger sister concerned

**CASSIE:**

_What did you do this time?_

There goes that smile again, goddamnit Cass

**EXT-ROAD-NIGHT**

Nate is just driving aimlessly; he knows he wants to go to Rue but what the fuck is he supposed to say? It was already weird enough showing up on the night of the Formal but now? What does he expect to gain from Rue? He doesn’t deserve the time Rue would give up talking to him, she looked at him with sympathy, no one has ever done that before. All this time Nate was so conflicted over his feelings, he thought he loved Maddy but that quickly changed after Jules came into town. Jules was everything Nate was against initially; I mean she used to be a dude for fucks sake. Nate didn’t care though, once he accepted her for who she was, he became Shy guy. Which was ironic because he really was shy to talk to Jules. He loved talking to her, learning about her like no one else had. He knew who she wanted to be, and he couldn’t have been happier for her. Then the lake happened, and he decided to protect his father rather than her, that was the worst mistake of his life. Now though, after everything that’s happened, Nate thinks he’s found somebody else, as fucked up as it is, Nate thinks he loves Rue.

**RUE (V.O):**

_It was truly fucked up that Nate fell in love with me of all people, first off, I’m a bigger mess than him… second, how the hell could I just forget all he did to Jules? I felt sympathy for him, sure, but for me to fall in love with him? I thought it wasn’t possible_

**INT-FEZ’S ROOM-NIGHT**

After what seems like hours (it was really like 30 minutes), Fez wakes up again. Rue tries a different approach this time

**RUE:**

_Sup…_

Ok maybe too casual, he’s not freaking out though so that’s good

**FEZ:**

Sup kid… sorry about earlier, I didn’t even know where I was

God, what the fuck happened to Fez? Rue had never seen him as anything then calm, and quiet. How did he get shot first of all?

**RUE:**

_So uhh, you want to tell me what you’re doing in the hospital with a bullet wound?_

Shit why was Fez here, the last thing he remembered was Mouse. They saw the blood on the cash and Mouse knew who’s.

**FEZ:**

_Mouse, Nate ratted me out, so I had to flush the product he gave me, I needed to make the money back, and it failed_

Rue knew he was being vague for a reason, so she decided not to pursue that line of questioning, of course he had a question for her though

**FEZ:**

_Forget bout me though, why the fuck is you here?_

Fuck, what was Rue going to say? He knew she was clean for those few months; it would crush him to learn that it was his grandmother’s pills that caused her to relapse. Before she could respond, her mom comes into the room

**LESLIE:**

_She overdosed, and I know they were your drugs so do you mind telling me why the fuck you’re selling drugs to my 17-year-old daughter?_

Well shit, Leslie sure had a way with words, that was too much though, Fez looks like he’s going to cry. Shit why is Fez suddenly so emotional? Was he always like this? Was this how he acted when she was banging on his front door?

**RUE:**

_Jesus mom! The guy just got shot for fucks sake, go outside please, I’ll explain everything to you in a minute_

Leslie was reasonably apprehensive, she only figured out Fez was Rue’s drug dealer because she asked Gia. Leslie had no choice but to listen to her daughter, clearly, they’re more than just drug buddies. With the two of them alone again, Fez can speak for himself

**FEZ:**

_Well one things for sure kid, she is definitely your mom. Have you seen Ashtray around? He was with me before… yeah before, I haven’t seen him yet._

Shit, Ashtray really hasn’t been around, Rue didn’t know if they were legit brothers but clearly, he cared about him.

**RUE:**

_No, he hasn’t been around, do you know where he could be?_

There’s only one place he could be, and Fez dreaded thinking about it

**FEZ:**

_Last, I seen em was at my place, but he can’t still be there, Mouse fucking shot me, I don’t know where else the kid could be though, can you go check on him? Get somebody else too actually cuz you’re fucked up too_

That got a laugh out of Rue, no matter the situation Fez always ends up being the good guy, even though he does sell drugs to teenagers… but let’s forget that.

**RUE:**

_Well I’m kind of stuck here for 2 more days, the doctors say I have to take it easy because something happened to me? I’m sure you heard (smiling) I’ll ask around, see if somebody can swing by_

Fez had to give Rue credit, even after all that’s happened she can still keep a smile on her face, that’s why he protected her, he couldn’t see her in pain… Fez had seen enough pain in his life

**FEZ:**

_Aight thanks kid, if you don’t mind I’m gonna go back to sleep, you know bullet wound and all_

Fez smiles that half-cocked smile he always gives Rue and closes his eyes, he can hear Rue linger for a bit before she leaves.

**INT-KAT’S ROOM-MORNING**

It has been 2 days since the eventful Formal and Kat’s in love. Not only did she wake the fuck up and hook up with Ethan, but now Maddy’s going to help her pick some clothing, normal clothes. Kat grabs her phone and texts her friend, wondering if she’s up so early. To her surprise, Maddy responds almost immediately.

**MADDY:**

_R we still going to the mall?_

**KAT:**

_Ofc I’ll meet U there_

Kat was actually pretty nervous, this was the first time she would speak with Maddy since the Formal, and well everyone had their own shit during that. Kat gets ready and heads out to meet her best friend.

**INT-HOSPITAL-MORNING**

Ok, how the fuck is Rue going to explain Fez, she already knows he’s a drug dealer so could it get any worse?

**RUE (V.O):**

_Honestly if you’re going to do drugs at 17, you might as well introduce your drug dealer to your parents, because otherwise you’d end up like me. Awkwardly explaining how the hell I know a Man that shares the name of a fucking candy._

Well Rue gives it a shot, explaining to her mom how she met Fez and that she started buying drugs from him because he said he didn’t want her getting hurt. Fez always cared about Rue, she was just oblivious to it, I mean really why would she know, he sold her drugs, so she didn’t have to think about shit like that.

**LESLIE:**

_Ok well that’s nice but I don’t want you going anywhere near him, just being in his presence puts you at risk, now get your ass back in that bed, you’re still weak_

Rue wanted to protest but she was right, Rue felt like shit, so she crawled back into her coffin and passed out.

**RUE (V.O):**

_This was starting to get on my nerves, getting up for 5 minutes then sleeping for 5 hours I mean come on body! I know I haven’t treated you the best but quit being such a bitch!_

**INT-ANNA’S ROOM-AFTERNOON**

It wasn’t until 12 in the afternoon until Jules got back with Anna, it took them 12 hours to see a stupid show. Jules was seriously out of it, but she still knew this couldn’t go on forever. If they weren’t making out, Jules and Anna didn’t speak, she thought it was just them getting to know each other but Anna just looked at her like a kid, treated her like one too. She missed her dad, her friends, Rue… especially Rue. She thought that Rue was too feminine for her, that she could only date men… except that was wrong because there was Anna; But something was different with Anna, she spoke to her like no one else could, like a siren luring sailors to their death. Jules was under Anna’s spell, but now that she’s realized her mistakes, she needs to talk to Rue. It’s taken her 2 days to realize this but she’s in love with Rue. When she answered that question during the Formal she wasn’t sure but now she knows it. Jules wants to be with Rue for the rest of her life, she needs her.

**INT-MALL-AFTERNOON**

So, things are going well! Kat is finally fixing her dreadful wardrobe and returning to her old self. Maddy and Kat have finally gotten back to normal, that’s at least one normal relationship Maddy has now so that’s a plus

**RUE (V.O):**

_Honestly, I didn’t really know Maddy too well, like I knew of her obviously because she’s literally the topic of school drama 24/7, but I knew one thing, she didn’t give up. Whether this was for a toxic relationship like Nate or a positive one like Kat’s, either way Maddy was stubborn. She never intended on hating Kat for the rest of her life, she just wanted Kat to realize she was right. After that, the two could be friends again_

After hundreds of dollars’ worth of clothing, Kat and Maddy take a break, cheerfully sitting down on one of those weird lounge chairs you see in a mall.

**KAT:**

_Oh…my… god! That was so fun! Thank you Maddy I owe you big time!_

Of course, Kat owed Maddy, but she wasn’t just going to admit that to her

**MADDY:**

_Bitch! You needed this more than anyone! Now you won’t look like Anastasia Grey or whatever her name was_

This made Kat laugh

**KAT:**

_I did not look that that bitch! How do you even know who that is? I’ve never seen you read a day in your life_

This was an obvious answer but too funny not to say

**MADDY:**

_I didn’t! It’s a movie too you dumbass! I learnt some moves from that beeeelive me_

Maddy was something else, but she was Kat’s best friend, she told her the truth always, when Kat fucked up Maddy made sure she knew. The guilt from blowing Maddy off when she was in a full-fledged breakdown still hung heavy on Kat, so she decided she was going to do whatever she could do to make it up to her.

**KAT:**

_Well, in other news, we should get together with Cass and Lex and have a girl’s night out! It’ll be fun, I mean when was the last time we were teenagers?_

That was not the type of question Kat should be asking, especially with her history, but it made sense

**MADDY:**

_Of course, Kat! Cassie could use her two best bitches now more than ever! Why Lexi though? She normally doesn’t like doing what we do_

As true as that was, Kat knew Lexi was probably the most deserving of a break. Ever since the Formal, Lexi was spending day and night with a fucked-up Rue. That had to take a toll on a person, plus Kat was pretty sure Lexi had a thing for Rue, but she couldn’t exactly confirm that.

**KAT:**

_Maybe it’s time she learns to like us, make her an honorary bitch!_

That made Maddy laugh

**MADDY:**

_Oh my god you are such a bitch! I’m in, how about this weekend?_

**KAT:**

_Yeah, Saturday night sound good?_

Maddy nodded her head in agreement, it was a date. The two get back up, heading back to hunting for clothes, there was much more to find.

**RUE (V.O):**

_I really loved Kat’s little self-awakening and shit, and Maddy growing to be independent. I just really wish they didn’t involve Lexi, if she hadn’t gone out with them that Saturday night, everything that followed, wouldn’t have_

**INT-CASSIE’S ROOM-AFTERNOON**

Ok so maybe McKay might be a bigger problem than Cassie thought. Ever since she responded with

**CASSIE (TEXT):**

_I’m doing a lot better; I miss you though =(_

McKay has been wanting to meet. Now when she sent that text she thought that would be it, she truly wanted to get over McKay and his bullshit, but she loved him, in her fucked up way. Cassie fell in love with literally every boy she met but McKay was different, at the end of the day he still made her feel good, even though he also made her feel just as bad. She really didn’t know what to do about this, she couldn’t decide if she wanted to be with this bipolar mess of a college student or if she wanted to be the baddest bitch version of herself (As she once said to Maddy… while on Molly). Maybe she could meet with him, explain to him that she wanted to move on, admit that she basically cheated on him with Daniel, she owed him that much at least. Maybe she should just ghost him, eventually he’ll give up. Maybe… shit the phone just went off, is it him? What does he want? What does it… oh its Kat… thank god

**KAT (TEXT):**

_Hey bitch! Me and Maddy are dying to see you again! Wanna do something fun Saturday night?_

Cassie hadn’t been so relieved in her life; thank god it was just her friends. Of course, she responded with

**CASSIE (TEXT):**

_Ofc bitch! I’ll def be down for that!_

Kat quickly responded

**KAT (TEXT):**

_Yay! Maddy will txt you the deets, oh btw bring Lexi, she could use a girls night out_

At first Cassie didn’t know what Kat meant but then it quickly came to her: Rue. Rue was like the kindest person in the world, however the effect she had on Lexi was like a fucking drug. Lexi never showed it, she made sure Rue never saw but Cassie saw everything. She saw Lexi crying the night after they went roller-skating. Lexi was half-convinced that Rue was asking her out on a date, but the sad reality was that she was to be Rue’s third wheel to Jules. Earlier than that Lex had a panic attack when Gia revealed to her that Rue was in love with Jules. Cassie had to sit through all of that, trying to console her love-sick little sister like she had any idea what love was. Cassie really loved Rue, she was basically her 2nd sister, but she really hoped that Rue would get her act together, and maybe finally realize that someone like Lexi in her life would be for the best. “Rexi” as Cassie called it, was her official ship name for the two, and she prayed it would eventually come to fruition

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

So, after another wasted day, just existing in her small hospital room, Rue was getting bored. Lexi was about to come back with some lukewarm pancakes the cafeteria was serving, which was weird because it was like 2 in the morning and she didn’t know why either of them were up, or craving pancakes, but the thought was still there. Rue was stuck in her own head again, the memory of that night was slowly becoming less defined, like a distant memory, even though it was 2 nights ago. Maybe Rue’s mind was repressing that memory? Maybe her brain knew that any thought of Jules would lead her to drugs again, which in turn would attack her body. Her brain was like fucking Fort Knox, it knew all the risks its host could put it through, it was pretty smart though. Thank God Lexi’s here, with that silly smile of hers, that cute, awkward one she always had plastered on her face whenever she was around Rue. Rue never understood why someone like her, who was harassed by Rue more than anybody, could still hold such a bright smile. Rue was grateful for it, Lexi was her 2nd sister, she had no idea what she would do without her.

**LEXI:**

_I brought pancakes! They had a few left, and they don’t look that good but still! Pancakes!_

That made Rue genuinely smile, which was hard to do nowadays. They both dug into the messy sponge-like delicacy, it really tasted like a sponge. This was nice, the two of them gleefully sitting in silence, with the only breaks being one burping and the other laughing. This was what Rue wanted, to stay with her best friend/sister, and better herself, this was what she was going to do. Of course, this being Rue’s life, another visitor came, the giant surprise that visited her during the night of the Formal

**NATE:**

_Uh, hi Rue, is this a bad time?_

Nate looked as awkward as could be, with those sad eyes of his. Lexi’s appropriate response was to drop her pancakes in surprise (Come on Lex that’s a waste of good food!).

**RUE (V.O):**

_As I said earlier, this was only the beginning of our nighttime meet ups, thankfully this was a positive one, although pretty angsty._


	5. The Confrontations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What the hell does Nate want with Rue now? What's going on anymore?

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

**RUE (V.O):**

_So yeah, Nate returned to my room, day 3 of my forced recovery from all things drugs. And he came to talk about drugs, mine in particular_

Lexi was forced to stay in her shocked state a little longer, to get an explanation as to why Nate fucking Jacobs was visiting her best friend/crush/ you get the point.

**NATE:**

_I know that I need to stop showing up unannounced, but I need to talk to you, can we talk privately for a few?_

Nate looked at the two girls with apprehension, he knew this wouldn’t go well, hell he didn’t want to be here anyways. He did, but he knew that they wouldn’t want him here, nobody does, he was a monster. The saddest part was that Nate hated himself more than they ever could, he had to live with it.

**LEXI:**

_Excuse me? No, you can—_

Rue cuts her off suddenly

**RUE:**

_Lexi give us a few, this shouldn’t take too long. We can eat pancakes all morning_

Rue said that so genuinely, with that perfect smile of hers. Lexi couldn’t help but oblige, what, was she going to tell Rue Bennett no? So, Lexi left, and went to the chair outside, which was like a 10-foot difference, Rue knew they weren’t going to get any better than that

**RUE:**

_So, Nate, to what do I owe the honor?_

Honestly, Nate didn’t even expect to get this far so its take a few for him to catch his bearings.

**NATE:**

_Uh, um- I wanted to see you, make sure you’re ok. I also wanted to ask about Jules if that’s ok…_

Why the fuck does everybody want to talk about Jules? Rue literally almost died over this girl and everybody wants to talk about her. God she really should’ve taken more drugs.

**RUE:**

_Sure! Everybody else has already questioned me.. why not you too!_

The tone that she spoke in made it obvious that she didn’t want to talk about Jules, Nate didn’t blame her, but he needed to know.

**NATE:**

_I know I asked you already, I shouldn’t have that soon, but… was this because of me?_

“This” in this situation meant everything that had happened in both Jules’ and Rue’s life in the past months. Rue was starting to understand Nate, he was a broken kid, seeking an attachment he could never find. Nate had lashed out at everybody around him because he thought they weren’t good enough when in reality, they were the best he could’ve asked for. Rue even believed Cal could be a good father to Nate if they both allowed each other to coexist, Nate had always fought with his father, for good reason. However now that Nate had his breakdown, there was nothing stopping them from some good old family bonding.

**RUE:**

_As much as I would love to blame you Nate, this isn’t your fault. Jules was planning on leaving because of your blackmail sure, but she was going to leave no matter what. If you’re asking about me being in the hospital, this was my fault, nobody else’s_

Nate’s eyes began to water, Jesus he really was a different person, for such a big person he certainly seemed small at the moment.

**RUE:**

_Look, I know this is fucked up, but I don’t trust you Nate, you have to understand why. So why are you really here? It can’t just be about Jules?_

That’s the second person that has told Nate they didn’t trust him, the sad part was that he understood why they both proclaimed their mistrust

**NATE:**

_I.. uh.. I don’t know Rue, I’m fucking changing and its terrifying me, I’ve always bottled up everything, you are the only person to ever see this side of me and I don’t know how to feel. I think i—_

Nate wanted to proclaim his interest in Rue, that she understood him and that he would spend the rest of his days making it up to her. He felt something for her that he never knew he could, he thought he loved her. He knew better though, just like Jules did to Rue; she couldn’t return the feelings that he felt. No matter what Nate did, he would be the evil, deranged senior who almost ruined Rue’s life. He knew he was about to make a mistake by uttering the phrase “I think I like you” so he quickly caught himself, deciding on a safer response

**NATE:**

_I (cough cough) want to make it up to you, I know that I’ve fucked up to the extreme and I know that I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I feel that if I don’t try than I’ll always be that evil, evil kid._

This level of self-awareness impressed Rue, just 2 days ago he was threatening Jules and making Rue feel less than worthless but now he’s the worthless one. Rue couldn’t help but feel sorry for him, there was pain in his eyes, like his true self came out, only to witness the chaos he started. Rue couldn’t let go of that psychotic view of him, Nate wasn’t just massive size wise but in aura, in the way that you can sense if somebody was stressed or not; Rue could almost feel the sinister aura he had, the face to face conversation they had at the Formal was almost suffocating, how could somebody be that cold hearted yet so calm? The thing that scared her was that that feeling was gone, Nate seemed genuine, but she was too afraid to trust it.

**RUE:**

_Nate.. what do you expect me to say? Do this for me and your sins are forgiven? You did some really fucked up things, you have to live with that shit just like I do. You want my forgiveness? I can’t give that to you, I can see you are trying to change but you can only change so much_

This hurt Nate, he knew what her response would be before she said it, every word was truth. Nothing Nate did would make up for the damage he caused, he had to be alone for now. Just like she needed to be alone to heal, he needed to be alone to feel like a person, his entire life had seemed like a numb existence. Nate lived day by day, getting drunk, fucking Maddy, going back home only to be reminded of his father’s dark secret every time he saw them; Nate didn’t feel human, he felt like a fucking animal, so he acted like one

**RUE:**

_Although I could use your help for one thing, you could kill two birds with one stone; help two people you’ve wronged._

Nates eyes lit up

**NATE:**

_Anything! Just tell me what you need from me._

**INT-JUST OUTSIDE RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Maddy finally got over to the hospital, going shopping with Kat was fun but the questions she had burned through any real sense of enjoyment she should’ve had. Maddy needed answers from Rue, why was Jules fucking Nate’s dad? And now the most pressing question was, why the fuck was Nate leaving her hospital room, wiping his eyes like he’s been crying? Seriously what the fuck was that? Thankfully Nate didn’t see Maddy but now that was priority number one. Of course, right as she was about to make her entrance, Lexi walked into the room; So Maddy decided she was going to wait for a little bit.

**INT-KAT’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Kat was currently in a debate with her boyfriend. The question of this debate was whether or not she could come for lunch tomorrow morning with Ethan’s parents. This made Kat kinda nervous because they just officially got together and here they were planning out a parent meeting. She wanted to though, Kat knew Ethan was the one, so she knew she had to go.

**KAT (TEXT):**

_Yes! I will meet your parents tomorrow, lmk the time and I will be there!_

Kat was the happiest she could be, everything was going right in her life, thank god

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Well after that long conversation with Nate, Rue needed some time to herself. Rue needed to think everything through, god she missed Jules. Jules would embrace Rue and talk her through this entire shit show, except Jules was fucking gone and Rue had nobody. Scratch that, Rue had Lexi, god every time Rue manages to forget the best friend she’s always had. It made Rue feel like shit that she forgot Lexi, it was never intentional, but Jules had completely taken over any thought Rue had. God Jules really was a drug, Rue not only needed to get over her obvious drug addiction, but she needed to get over Jules, so she needed to stop thinking about her! Oh, thank god Lexi is coming back in, Rue needed her best friend to talk to

**LEXI:**

_Rue? What the fuck was that? Why was Nate Jacobs visiting you?_

Oh, fuck that’s right, how the hell was Rue going to explain this? Oh, fuck it she deserved to know

**RUE:**

_He wanted to talk about Jules but really it was about him repaying me or some shit._

Ugh this was horribly awkward for Rue, Lexi deserved so much better than Rue, yet she stuck around no matter what, it reminded her of her attachment to Jules.

**LEXI:**

_Ummm ok whatever, can we go back to eating our pancakes?_

Rue flashed that heart-warming smile that always got to Lexi and responded with a sweet

**RUE:**

_Of course, Howard, lets focus on the case of the spongey pancakes, do you think they’re just sponges or some kind of hybrid?_

The cute furrow in Rue’s brow was enough to make Lexi’s heart flutter, she just hoped it wasn’t revealing.

**LEXI:**

_Well Bennett, I really don’t know, I’m leaning on more of them being some kind of buttery hybrid._

The two are laughing like nothing has happened, like the event that almost killed Rue 2 days ago never occurred. This blissful night of forgetfulness was the best thing Rue could have asked for. For the entire night going forward, Rue didn’t think twice about Jules, she was beginning to move on.

 **INT-MADDY’S HOUSE-NIGHT  
** Well that was a failure, Maddy planned on questioning Rue like some kind of detective but Lexi just wouldn’t leave. Seeing those two laugh and smile like nothing happened only made it worse for Maddy because she couldn’t think of the last time that had been her. She needed to focus on herself, on her friendships with Cassie and Kat. Those two would follow her to the grave, they were her best friends and no matter what any of them did, they would end up back together. Maybe a call to Jules wouldn’t hurt though… yeah Maddy was definitely going to call Jules tomorrow. She still needed to have answers, and who better but the subject in question?

**INT-MCKAY’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

Cassie planned on meeting McKay tonight, at his house of all places. She knew what she was going to say, what she wasn’t going to do. A part of Cassie wanted her to forgive him, to lunge at him and make out with the face of the man she loved. But Cassie knew she couldn’t do that, she needed to move on for good, to become a woman she had to leave the man she loved. Arriving at his front door, Cassie had no idea what was going to happen, she hoped he would be there, he told her he would, but his word meant nothing at this point. Thankfully when she knocked, McKay answered with that sly smile he always gave her.

**MCKAY:**

_Hey Cassie, how have you been?_

**INT-FEZ’S HOUSE-NIGHT  
** Nate had no idea how this was going to go but he had to at least try. He promised Rue that he would check on Ashtray, to find him and bring him back to Fez. Now the difficult part about that was that he almost got the two of them locked up for drug possession, you know because he called the cops on them. Nate knew that the little kid, turned drug dealer would have ill-feelings towards Nate, like everybody else did. Except Ashtray had a gun, a gun that was pointed at Nate’s forehead

**ASHTRAY:**

_The fuck you want?_

Shit, how was Nate going to get Ashtray to trust him?

**NATE:**

_Look, Rue sent me, she says that Fez is trying to reach you but couldn’t. Could you please put the gun down and get in the truck with me? I’ll bring you to him_

This was a tense situation for the both of them, Nate because he had a fucking gun aimed at his head but for Ashtray this was a different level; He never killed anybody, yet here he was, pointing a gun at the man who got Fez shot in the first place. What the fuck were they going do?

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-MORNING**

The two girls had stayed up the entire night laughing and eating pancakes, Rue enjoyed every moment of their mania. They finally passed out at like 4 am and now Rue was being woken up by her mother.

**LESLIE:**

_Rue, Rue! Wake up, there’s some man here saying he knows you? He wants to make sure you’re ok_

Ok what the fuck, literally every time Rue thinks her life has calmed down, somebody else has to enter the fold and complicate it further. Except the person stood before her eyes was the last person she expected to appear, yet she was thankful he showed up when he did.

**ALI:**

_Hey kid, Rough couple of days?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this one is a little shorter but I promise chapter 6 will make up for it!


	6. The Redemption

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who is that strange car following Nate and ashtray? What's going on with Lexi Howard? Does Rue know?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for such a long wait but its here finally! I hope you enjoy

**INT-THE JACOB** **’S HOUSE-MORNING**

**RUE (V.O):**

_You may wonder why I_ _’m talking about Nate Jacobs yet again, but this isn’t his story; This is the story about his younger brother Calvin, you know the kid in the photo that I failed to mention before? Well this is why:_ _Nate loved his younger brother Calvin, he was funny, he cared about others, he felt like the only person Nate could talk to in that suffocating household. It was ironic that his brother was named Calvin, he was junior to the man Nate hated the most, yet he loved his brother. Nate was only 10 when Calvin was 6, he was protective, he was what he wanted his older brother, Aaron, to be, a brother; Somebody he could talk to. Calvin had Asthma, really bad asthma, the kind that could kill you if you don_ _’t be careful_ _. So Careful they were, every time Calvin even looked like he was breathing weirdly, he rushed to his side with inhaler in hand. The boys would be left alone at the house at night because their mother worked an overnight job and their father, well we know what he did. Nate did too, and it only made him hate his father more, from a young age Nate had to be a grown up; Instead rather than his father being a raging alcoholic who needed to be taken care of, Cal fucked little boys out of his free will. Although he hated being alone, he liked being alone with Calvin, they would always find something cool to do, whether it be imaginary stories or video games, the two boys stayed busy. There was not a care in the world when they were left alone because Nate could finally be a kid, Calvin was the best little brother he could_ _’ve asked for. One night the boys devised an elaborate story where Nate was a supervillain holding the hostage (which was really a pillow) from Calvin, the superhero who would save the day. Nate didn’t like being the villain, but he_ _did it because it made Calvin happy. So, the boys played, and played, until they were out of breath. Nate thought nothing of it because well his lungs were healthy, but this one time it didn_ _’t dawn on Nate that Calvin couldn’t breathe. It took Nate exactl_ _y 6 seconds to realize his brother was dying, that the air in his lungs was nonexistent and that he needed his inhaler. Nate didn_ _’t know where it was though, the usual location of the kitchen drawer was empty so where the fuck was it?_ _Nate wouldn_ _’t know th_ _e answer to that until the funeral, where his father belligerently admitted that he was refilling it that same night. Where was Cal that night? Having sex with one of his many escorts, away from the family that needed him. Nate never forgave Cal for that, and he never will; without Calvin, Nate had nobody to talk to, it would lead him to becoming the man we knew him as, the angry, violent, borderline psychopathic Nate. His father would spend the rest of his natural life trying to make it up to Nate, but he never could. So, when I sent Nate to get Ashtray, I had no idea how much it would hurt him, because I didn_ _’t know, nobody did until his second breakdown._

**INT-THE CITY-MORNING**

Jules was depressed, or at least she thought she was. Sure, she was living it up in the city, living her “best queer” life as Anna described it; But something was missing, or somebody more specifically. She thought leaving Rue that day was for the best of the both of them, Jules was stressed about Nate and his psychotic demands as well as the overwhelming pressure that she was responsible for Rue’s sobriety. Jules misinterpreted what Lexi said during the skating rink that “it’s because of you, you know” Jules took it as “you’re responsible for Rue now, don’t fuck up”. Anybody realistically would think this, Rue was an addict up until the ultimatum she was given, and she chose Jules. Jules stressed the fuck out, believing she needed to take care of Rue, so she resorted to that drunken display at the Halloween party to cope, which wasn’t the best idea because Rue looked really upset after that. Jules had really fucked up, she realized that all Rue needed was a friend, maybe something more along the line but she just wanted a person to rely on. That happened to be Jules, so to learn Rue was in the hospital due to a self-inflicted kidney infection, she freaked, once again believing this was entirely on her. Sure, she probably had a big part in Rue’s depressed week, but she was bipolar, so Jules didn’t need to be too worried, she just needed to be there for Rue. She then failed to do that because Anna kept texting her, and the oh so hot Anna was eating up all of her time at the Winter Formal; This prevented her from spending time with the person she really should have been caring about. Of course, at the time she thought nothing of it, it seemed fine to Jules that she was talking to Anna, nothing too serious had been established between the two and quite frankly Jules didn’t know if she wanted anything too serious. Well, it turns out she does… now, after ditching her love on the train station. Jules hated herself now, the one truly good thing in her life and she just fucking leaves? She once told Rue that “I hate everybody in the world except you” and yet she did what she did out of blind lust. Anna at the time seemed like the best thing to happen to Jules, at the moment that is. Now Anna is passed out, drunk, again for like the 5th time today after yet another drug/alcohol fueled orgy. All Jules was to Anna was sex, that was clear now, and she had enough. Jules wants to go home, to hold Rue and tell her how sorry she is, how she’ll never ever leave again and love her forever. She bets that Rue is laying in her bed, crying, she hopes that she’s still sober, in fact she knows she still is… because Jules wasn’t the only reason for her sobriety… right? Jules leaves the filthy apartment of her manipulative ex-lover, prepared to return home except she’s interrupted by a phone call: Is it Rue? Dad? Who could it be? It’s Maddy, why the fuck is Maddy calling Jules?

**INT-RUE** **’S ROOM-MORNING**

**RUE (V.O):**

_So yeah, Ali came back to visit and scold me about how much of an idiot I was. How I should_ _’ve listened to him from the start and I have only myself to blame. Of course, I_ _cried like the emotional child I am, but everything he said was true, no matter how much I loved Jules, she was going to leave. I never expected to experience such heartbreak at such a young age, I mean this is some Romeo and Juliet shit, but I_ _’m glad I di_ _d now, with friends and family to support me after my fuck ups._

After yet another eventful morning (Rue really needs to get a do not disturb sign), Rue has only her mother and Lexi to comfort her. This isn’t a complaint on her part, Lexi has become her spiritual Jules in a way, she feels like she can talk to Lexi just as she spoke to Jules; Lexi is just so welcoming, that brightness to her makes her seem warm and comforting, like a parents embrace. She still doesn’t understand why Lexi still comes every day, Rue was a bitch to her to for the last few months, intentionally or not she knew it hurt Lexi; Every time she meant to apologize and make it up to her, Jules would get involved. And this wasn’t Jules’ fault, Rue would include her accidentally, believing at the time that there was no problem inviting her, except this resulted in Lexi awkwardly third wheeling. Rue played oblivious to this, but she knew, she felt horrible for doing it but her new drug took over any and all thoughts. This isn’t to say Jules was a terrible person, she wasn’t, Rue just depended on her too much . She didn’t realize this until she was snorting another row of whatever the fuck she found right after the Formal. Lexi didn’t demand sympathy though, Rue admired that, she smiled through the tough bits and made the good times great. There was nothing Lexi could’ve done that would’ve upset Rue, she had experienced the worst a teenage girl could have experienced, or at least she thought.

**LEXI:**

_Rue are you ok? Ever since that guy came in you_ _’ve been quiet as hell_

Oh, shit that’s right, Rue’s been in her thoughts the past 5 minutes, at least she can be trusted to her thoughts now.

**RUE:**

_What? Oh yeah, I_ _’m ok Lex_ _it_ _’s_ _just a lot being woken up every single day with some kind of revelation_

Rue tries to laugh away this awkward tension between the two, it kind of works

**LEXI:**

_Yeah well, OD_ _’ing for the second time tends to change some things_

That was a risky joke on Lexi’s part, but to her surprise Rue starts to laugh, a genuine laugh. That couldn’t have made Lexi any happier, her best friend was getting better!

**RUE:**

_Yeah well Howard, how else can a girl get some attention these days!_

The two both start laughing, Lexi just looks at Rue with that adoration she always gives her. Lexi is finally at peace, Rue is ok now, for the most part anyways. She’s going to watch over Rue for a little while longer, then she thinks the two could use some distance, she doesn’t want to make herself too obvious. Rue on the other hand has kicked into full detective mode, she’s noticed something quite dire… Every time Lexi looks at Rue, it reminds her of the look she gave Jules. It doesn’t just end there though, Lexi has always stuck around, through the worst of Rue’s life, Lexi has been the one there for her. Why does she do this? Why would somebody put themselves through that much pain unless… Oh my god, Lexi is in love with Rue. She has to be, that’s the only way somebody would put up with her shit to that extent, she would know because she was the same. How was she going to bring this up? Would she at all? Before any more internal questioning could be brought forward, Rue’s phone rings. She checks it and sees that Nate is calling her, shit she forgot she gave him her number when she sent him after Ashtray, well… better answer

**RUE:**

_Hey Nate, you find him?_

**INT-NATE** **’S CAR-** **MORNING**

**ASHTRAY:**

_Yes, the fuck he did! You wanna tell me why this prick is bringing me to a hospital?_

Well, that’s definitely Ashtray

**RUE:**

_You know why dumbass, Fez got shot, I_ _’m sure you were there when it happened. Look just get down here, try not to kill each other._

Nate was having a seriously rough time here, but he owed this to Rue

**NATE:**

_Yea, the traffics shit right now because of the holidays so this might take a bit. We_ _’ll see you when we get there._

Nate hung up before Rue could respond, he felt awkward casually talking on the phone with the poor girl. Nate never saw himself in a situation like this, driving a kid for a drug dealer across town to visit his other drug dealer/ brother? Nate didn’t know if they were blood, but they sure acted like it. What was really freaking Nate out was seeing how similar Ashtray was to his brother Calvin. Calvin died young but he sure as shit looked a lot like Ashtray, even acted the same to a point; Just minus the foul mouth and pre-mature tattoos.

**NATE:**

_Look kid, I don_ _’t know you and you kind of know me but still,_ _let_ _’s_ _just get over there as peacefully as possible_

Ashtray of course was being as annoying as humanly possible, putting his feet on the dash, opening up all of the compartments looking for food

**ASHTRAY:**

_I don_ _’t know what you’re talking about, I’m as calm as can_ _be_

He motions to the still loaded gun in his pocket, Nate figures he won’t actually use it but if it gives the kid some peace then so be it. Although Nate’s trying to be a better person this kid is getting on his nerves, no level of empathy will allow Nate to stay calm. Nate had actually forgotten about his little brother for a while, being so wound up in drugs, Maddy, the occasional assault of Tyler. Everything Nate did strayed him farther away from the kid he once was, he was blind to it all until the Formal. Everything rushed out at once and Calvin came right back to his life, he felt like he could feel his little brother looking down on him in disapproval, and now he has to drive a kid who looks just like him? This feels like god’s way of punishing Nate, he’s trying to repent for all of the fuck ups in his life, but will it be enough? Nate practically ruined Tyler’s life, turned Maddy into some wacked out, obsessive abuse victim, and Jules… he couldn’t forgive himself. Nothing Nate did now would allow him to forget what he did then, every good action would be compared to a bad one, he would never be good enough. The amount of self-hatred Nate had for himself was insurmountable, it would never end… at least he thought that. When he visited Rue those two times, he felt like he mattered, like no matter what happened, Rue would be there to at least comfort Nate. This was such a bizarre feeling to Nate, of all people he never expected Rue to even bat an eye at his pain. He caused her so much, she lost the love of her life essentially because of him, no matter what she tried to say. Nate didn’t know how to feel, he didn’t know if what he felt was love but he sure as hell felt something. Bringing this kid back to the hospital was Nate’s only goal, except he could tell there was a car tailing him, it’s been following him the past few blocks so they’re not even trying to be subtle.

**  
NATE:**

_Hey kid do you know who that car is behind us? They_ _’ve been following us since I picked you up_

Ashtray looked at him with confusion but decided to look anyways, his eyes widening immediately

**ASHTRAY:**

_Shit! That_ _’s Mouse yo! Pick up the fucking pace pretty boy, and don’t call me kid_

**NATE:**

_Who the fuck is Mouse? And you don_ _’t call me pretty boy… kid!_

The two look at each other with such frustration but this situation is dire

**ASHTRAY:**

_That_ _’s our supplier, he’s the one who shot Fez!_

  
Well, fuck… now Nate has a drug dealer after him

**NATE:**

_Alright well stay cool, he_ _’s not gonna do something in a public road like this, the plan stays the_ _same, we go to the hospital. This_ _“Mouse” isn’t going to do anything in a public hospital, I doubt he’s that dumb. I’ll take care of him when we get there_

That didn’t exactly sit well with Ashtray, but he didn’t have a choice, he lowered himself back into his seat and goes quiet. Who knew it would take the possibility of death to finally chill Ashtray out… ah well, now Nate had to figure out what the fuck he was going to do.

**INT-KAT** **’S ROOM-AFTERNOON**

Kat just got back from the best lunch of her life and she can’t wait to tell the girls. Kat reaches into her purse and texts the newly formed group chat

**KAT (TEXT):**

_Hey girls! I know its early but let_ _’s meet up now! I have to tell you guys some stuf!_

Within a minute of her text all the girls reply with a decisive

**MADDY,CASSIE:**

_OK!_

Cassie just has to go get Lexi from the hospital, she’s probably either asleep or in deep conversation with Rue so she’s going to have to be physically removed.

**INT-RUE** **’S ROOM-AFTERNOON**

Cassie rushes into the hospital room to witness the two girls in joyful bliss, as usual. This is a good thing though, maybe Rue’s realizing what’s good for her.

**CASSIE:**

_Hey you two! Good to see you_ _’re doing better Rue!_ _Well I hate to interrupt this lover_ _’s quarrel, but we’ve got a date to attend L_ _ex!_

That comment made Lex blush a crimson red, she really hopes Rue doesn’t notice her vibrant facial features, so she uncomfortably stands up, facing away from Rue

**LEXI:**

_What? I thought that wasn_ _’t until later?_

Lexi’s awkwardness was so cute to Cassie, she could tell she really embarrassed her there

**CASSIE:**

_Well Kat just texted me and she wants to meet up now, I know you want to hang out with your best friend, but you need to get out and live your life! No offense Rue Rue!_

Rue agreed, Lexi needed to hang out with somebody other than her for at least a couple of hours. Plus, she needed some alone time, she needed to figure this all out. Plus, she was tired as fuck sooo.

**RUE:**

_Yeah, yeah none taken! Lexi, you go have fun, text me later if you want and stay safe!_

Well that was the most awkward sentence Rue has ever uttered to Lexi due to a multitude of reasons. A: She is sleep deprived, so her English is a little fucky, B: She was already certain Lexi was in love with her so C: Cassie practically confirming this with that “Lover’s quarrel” comment only solidified her theory. Why would Lexi be in love with Rue? Of all people, why choose the shittiest? Rue couldn’t think of any logical reason but then again was love logical? The person you think you love is often not “the one” it’s often the person you overlook, the one you think couldn’t possibly express their feelings to you. Rue wasn’t an expert on love, her only real “relationship” if she could call it that ended in an O’D so there’s that. The next question was: Did Rue love Lexi back? She was just getting over Jules, but she felt 100% better the moment she woke up and saw Lexi there, smiling at her. It was a shock that such a tragic event could still evoke that heart-melting smile, the one that makes you feel like everything is going to be ok. Strangely her first memory that came to her before she snorted that chemical fuckery was of Lexi and her, on their 6th birthday, the wish that Rue had made; Rue wished for her and Lexi to be friends for the rest of their lives, that she wished they could always rely on each other and grow old together. That was surprisingly deep for a 6 year old but it rung true even now, she thought of Lexi differently, where Jules was the daring love, the one that was almost dangerous, how she could turn on the drop of a dime; Lexi was the exact opposite, she felt safe to approach, like there wasn’t anything Rue could do that would cause their friendship to end. Even when Rue cursed Lexi out in the bathroom, she immediately felt like scum, she knew she fucked up but thankfully Lexi forgave her. It never dawned on her how much she depended on the small, awkward Lexi. Rue needed some time to think it all over, was it too soon to start seeking somebody new? How would everybody react? Does she even like Lexi like that? Fuck she had a lot to go over.

**EXT-HOSPITAL-AFTERNOON**

After what seemed like an eternity, Nate finally managed to get to the fucking hospital. Ashtray is still freaking out about their unwanted guest who did actually follow them the entire way; Nate had to give this “Mouse” guy props, not just anyone would chase somebody down into a hospital.

**NATE:**

_Ok kid listen, when I shut this truck off you are going to wait, you are going to watch me go over to this piece of shit and when he puts his hands on me, you sneak over to the front desk, you find Fez and you get back to him_

**ASHTRAY:**

_What and just leave yo ass? You don_ _’t know this dude, he’s seriously fucked in the head_

Nate smiles at this

**  
NATE:**

_Clearly, you don_ _’t know me_

Without another word, Nate steps out of the truck and walks slowly over to the shitty little car that’s been following him for the past hour and a half. Cautiously, Nate taps on the window of the driver’s seat and is greeted by the ugliest looking fuck he’s ever seen. Tattoo’s draped across his face like some kind of fucking awards, Mouse really did look like a piece of shit, so he explained that to him

**NATE:**

_Well aren_ _’t you fucking ugly_

This clearly offended the man as he quickly steps out of the vehicle and points a gun at Nate’s head

**MOUSE:**

_Da fuck you say Bitch? Do you know who I am?_

Yeah, Nate did know who he was

**NATE:**

_Mouse right? The notorious drug dealer who supplies every wannabe start up in the state? I_ _’m honored to finally meet the guy who’s responsible_ _for so much pain_

Getting on people’s nerves was Nate’s greatest trait, He found it a lot harder now because he wasn’t that piece of shit anymore, but he could still get the job done. Little did Mouse know, but at this point he has turned on his phone and hit record, hoping he could get Mouse to slip up

**MOUSE:**

_So you_ _’re giving me titles huh? I must be sum kind of legend on dese streets den Yeah that’s_ _me, Mouse, the one and only pimp in these streets_

God he was so full of himself

**NATE:**

_So what was your plan exactly? Chase me down? Shoot me? In front of all these potential witnesses? Not only do you not have it in you, but you can_ _’t aim for shit apparently cause the last guy you shot is resting comfortably up there_

Nate points to the very top of the hospital, Fez is located on the second floor.

**MOUSE:**

_When I_ _’m_ _done with your white ass I_ _’m gunna make sure to finish off ya boy Fez too, all ya’ll gonna regret fuckin with me!_

This was laughable to Nate, ever since he realized how much of a monster he was, no one else could even compete.

**NATE (LAUGHING):**

_Really? That easily huh? I_ _’m supposed to be afraid of a dude named after a fucking rodent? You are worthless, you grew up on the streets thinking you could be gangster number one_ _, and when you became that, you chose MOUSE as your street name_ _… god you are pitiful!_

Nate had already shut the phone off at this point because he knew things were going to get violent, he wanted to hurt Mouse; So when Mouse swung the gun at his head he simply backed up, grabbed Mouse’s head and smacked it into the hood of his shitty car. Dazed, Mouse tries to swing at Nate again, but he fails, Nate catching his arm and pinning it behind his back.

**NATE:**

_And now a kid just beat your ass and broke your car, not having a good day huh?_

The blood dripping from Mouse’s mouth prevented him from speaking but the fear made it clear

**NATE:**

_Now listen closely because this next bit is where it gets REALLY bad for you. You just admitted to the attempted murder of Fezco, and threatened a minor on video, now you could try to say that isn_ _’t you saying these threats but Let’s be honest all of the cops in the area want your head on a platter; They would do anything they could to jail you and now they c_ _an. Buuut I don_ _’t want to do that if I don’t have to, you_ _see all you have to do is get back in that shitty little car and drive off. Never go near me, Fezco, Ashtray or anybody else related to us, or you will go to jail for a very long time._

Mouse didn’t have to respond for Nate to know the message was clear, He compliantly goes into his car and drives away. Nate decides it’s a good time to make sure the kid got to Fez’s room safely, so he starts to walk to the front desk. He realizes he’s smiling, he’s finally proud of something he did, rather than threatening somebody for his benefit, he did it for the right reason. He walks into the front desk and realizes that Ashtray is just sitting there in the lobby, practically jittering out of his seat.

**NATE:**

_Hey, the fuck you still doing here kid! I told you, go see Fez_

Ashtray practically jumps out of his seat when he realizes Nate is alive and well

**ASHTRAY:**

_Yo what the fuck happened? You good?_

This was strange to Nate, Ashtray actually seemed kind of concerned about his health

**NATE:**

_Yeah I_ _’m good kid, now let’s get y_ _ou to Fez he_ _’s probably losing his shit right now, I’ll tell you what happened on the way._

Ashtray nods and smirks, Nate’s warming up to this kid. What Nate couldn’t do for Calvin, he did for Ashtray, he thinks this is his way forward, his repentance for all the heinous things he has done. Nate doesn’t know how long he’ll have to endure this pain, but he’ll do it as long as he has to. Nate takes the Kid’s arm and walks him over to Fez’s room, glad his day is done… for now.

**INT-THE HOWARD HOUSE-NIGHT**

The three girls arrive at the Howards residence, deciding that their night would consist of the trio spilling tea. They all sit down around the very table where Cassie asked the girls about Daniel, where Maddy cursed out Kat; This table had interventional powers so they decided this would be the best area to talk.

**KAT:**

_So since I called you guys over here in such a rush, let me go first, so I met Ethan_ _’s parents today!_

**INT-ETHAN** **’S HOUSE-MORNING**

Kat explains to the girls her wonderful meeting with Ethan and his parents. How it was a dream come true.

**ETHAN:**

_Well you look lovely Kat, as always_

Kat blushed, she finally picked out some normal looking clothes due to Maddy’s help, so she felt good. His parents were nice; they were quiet just like him; It made sense as to why he why as shy as he was. Kat liked this though, it was nice. Kat explains to the girls how they had such a great time. The story felt a little boring because it was, nothing out of this world happened to Kat for once, she just simply went to see her boyfriend’s parents and further fell in love. Compared to the shitty past few months, Kat couldn’t complain about a few days of peace, she enjoyed every minute of it.

**INT-THE HOWARD HOUSE-NIGHT**

Kat’s short yet sweet story was just fucking adorable, all the girls sitting at this table had experienced heartbreak, even poor Lexi.

**MADDY:**

_Awwee bitch! I_ _’_ _m so happy for you, I_ _’_ _m glad at least one of us is living their best life!_

Now Lexi thought this was great too, except it also depressed her further. Why couldn’t this be her? She was beginning to get angry with herself, with Rue; this was difficult for Lexi because she loved Rue, she would do anything for her, but she knew that Rue couldn’t return these feelings. Lexi was caught in an impossible situation, she wanted to admit her feelings, but she was too afraid of Rue’s reaction. Would she turn her down? How would Lexi survive that? She was afraid of how her emotions would alter her, she saw Rue’s reaction to Jules, how she was locked in her room for a week, how she ended up in the hospital for love. Lexi barely understood how she felt as it was but with the risk of literal depression, Lexi is afraid.

**LEXI:**

_Hey guys can I ask you all something?_

The other girls all nod their heads; Cassie knows where this is going.

**LEXI:**

_What do you do when you really like somebody, but they definitely don_ _’_ _t like you? But like you know what’s best for them, and they make your days’ worth going through, even if they end up in the hospital_

Before any response could be made, Cassie interrupts

**CASSIE:**

_She_ _’_ _s talking about Rue by the way_

Fuck, now that it’s out there it made it real, Lexi really did like Rue. The girls don’t look even a little surprised though so what the fuck is going on?

**MADDY:**

_Oh we know, Lexi is literally the most obvious person in the world, look We_ _’_ _re probably the worst people on the planet to be asking about love advice. All I can say is with rue, let her heal first. She_ _’_ _s obviously still messed up from like all the drugs and shit, so I_ _’_ _d give her some space, be there when she needs you but don_ _’_ _t be too clingy._

**CASSIE:**

_And another thing Lex, Rue likes you, she always has, I mean come on why else would you two still be friends if there wasn_ _’_ _t something more to it?_

Cassie’s rebuttal was meant to reassure Lexi because she knew she was getting upset, she hated it when Lexi got upset over Rue. There was only so much Cassie could do to quell the overwhelming feelings Lexi had but she tried her best when she could, the only problem was that recently her problems seemed to eclipse Lexi’s. Meeting McKay and hooking up with him seemed like the best thing to ever happen to her, dating a college freshman who wasn’t a complete asshole was rare. Except he was an asshole, the worst kind, McKay wasn’t aware that his words hurt her. Cassie knew that the things she did weren’t good, she didn’t want to sleep with all those boys, but it made them happy and that’s what she thought mattered. Cassie thought McKay was different when he was actually the same. So when she got pregnant and he didn’t support her, Cassie knew it was over. He never even bothered to text her until after… during the Winter Formal, when she was trying to be happy.

**LEXI:**

_I don’t know… I’m not good enough for her, I don’t know if I ever could be_

There was that look, the look of utter heartbreak. It broke Cassie’s heart into a million pieces, knowing that somebody like Rue could have such an impact on her little sister. The reality was that Cassie wasn’t sure if Rue deserved Lexi, after all Lexi had been put through she didn’t know exactly if she WANTED them to be together.

**CASSIE:**

_That’s what I thought with McKay, that’s why I confronted him last night and finally put an end to it_

This shocked the girls

**MADDY:**

_What? You met with McKay last night?_

Shit, Cassie forgot that was what she was going to tell them about

**CASSIE:**

_Yeah, that’s what I wanted to tell you guys_

**INT-MCKAY’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

Entering McKay’s house, Cassie didn’t know what to expect. He greeted her with that signature smirk he was always known for, like nothing had happened. Clearly he was trying to keep his composure because Cassie could see his hands shaking when he was walking her up to the stairs. Thinking he was trying something, Cassie asks

**CASSIE:**

_Um- what are we doing up here?_

McKay looks at her with a somber look, she doesn’t think she’s ever seen that face before

**MCKAY:**

_Just trust me Cass, I_ _’_ _m not going to do anything_

The weird thing was that she trusted him, even now. McKay had nothing to gain from harming her now, they weren’t together anymore, she didn’t know what they were actually. Following McKay, he motions to the floor, to where they first met.

**MCKAY:**

_Please Cass, sit with me, I just want to talk_

This was strange for McKay, never before had he been so vague, so calm. This side of McKay was difficult to read, Cassie couldn’t do anything other than oblige, so she could get the answers she wanted. So Cassie sits down next to him, astonished by the rush of emotions that’s hitting her

**CASSIE:**

_So what is this McKay? I made it clear that we were done_

McKay winces, clearly that hurt him

**MCKAY:**

_I know that, that’s not why I called for you to meet me. I wanted to apologize personally, for everything I have done. Nothing I did was acceptable, I should’ve been more caring, I should’ve been honest. I shouldn’t have judged you for who you are, I had no right to, i—_

**CASSIE:**

_I forgive you McKay, we’re just kids; No matter how much older we try to make ourselves seem, we are children. I don’t blame you for everything, I should’ve confronted you sooner, than maybe we could have fixed this, maybe if you said what you wanted to, we could have fixed this. No matter how many “maybes” we come up with, we still have our mess in front of us. I love you McKay, I always will, but what we had was toxic on both sides; We need to be away from each other for a while, let me figure out myself and you do the same._

McKay didn’t know how to respond, he thought he was going to have to plead for forgiveness, to proclaim how sorry he was. Cassie knew by the look on his face that he already was, she hadn’t been the best girlfriend either, the moment things got hard she would run to another boy, that wasn’t love. She had some form of love for McKay, but she couldn’t be sure yet, as she said, they were just children.

**INT-HOWARD’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

**LEXI:**

_Then what happened?!_

Lexi asks with surprise, expecting something bad to have happened.

**CASSIE:**

_Nothing happened Lex! We hugged, we cried for a little bit then I left, we left on good terms_

Lexi admired her sister for that, knowing that she would get hurt, Cassie still went to McKay and admitted her feelings. Albeit these were feelings that led to their breakup, but Cassie is a better person for it. She was glad that she joined in on this little girl chat, it was helping Lexi figure out what to do about Rue. She could tell after their last chat that Rue was getting suspicious, with those detectives eyes in place; Lexi felt like she was being analyzed. That’s why Lexi started the Howard and Bennett joke, Rue had those eyes that felt like she was hyper aware of everything in the room, like a detective. Lexi loved that about her, Lexi just wanted to come out to her, but she was afraid.

**MADDY:**

_Well y’all ain’t gonna believe what I did this morning!_

**EXT-THE CITY-MORNING**

Why was Maddy calling Jules? It obviously must’ve been important, so she answers right away

**JULES:**

_Hey Maddy, what’s up?_

Jules could hear Maddy’s sharp breath

**MADDY:**

_What the fuck do you mean what’s up? Don’t you have any idea what the fucks been happening these past few days? Where the fuck did you go?_

Jules was beginning to feel nervous

**JULES:**

_I went to the city, I’m sure Rue told you? What do you mean, what’s been happening these past few days?_

Was Jules really that clueless?

**MADDY:**

_RUE IS WHAT HAPPENED! She fucking overdosed after you left, she said she kept a little bit just for safe keeping? How the fuck do you not know this? Haven’t you been texting her?_

WHAT? Rue… overdosed… again? This couldn’t be happening, she was getting better, she wasn’t that dependent on Jules was she? Oh my god Jules did this, she fucking left the love of her life at the train station, the same person who 6 months prior overdosed, the same person who struggled with her sobriety up until she met Jules. This couldn’t be happening, Jules was finally making herself feel better about this, she was going to go back and find Rue, she was going to smother her with kisses and apologies. This couldn’t happen now, how the fuck was Jules going to see Rue now?

**MADDY:**

_Bitch! Are you still there?_

Oh my god she’s been talking to herself

**  
JULES:**

_Yea.. I’ve been trying to text her for the longest and haven’t been getting any replies… is she ok? Oh my god is she awake?_

**MADDY:**

_I wonder why she hasn’t been responding, oh I know why! Yes she’s awake, I need you to come back, I have a lot of questions for you about Nate’s dad_

Ok WHAT? How did Maddy know about that?

**JULES:**

_I was about to come back anyways! The next train is going to be at 5 pm so I’ll be back by 7, oh my god how am I going to see her?_

Hot tears were running down Jules face, she ran away to leave her problems behind; Yet she created an even bigger one by leaving.

**MADDY:**

_Well, first you’re going to explain yourself to me, I don’t think you should see Rue immediately, wait until she gets released. She needs some time_

Jules understood

**JULES:**

_Ok, I’ll be there as soon as I can_

**INT-HOWARD’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

Well tonight turned out to be quite eventful for the four girls. The new panic was how they were going to handle Jules when she arrived, it was 7:01 now which meant by now she had to have been off the train and getting ready to call Maddy. She was going to tell her she was at Lexi’s house and to meet them but that couldn’t work for Lexi.

**LEXI:**

_Um guys I have something of my own to admit to_

The girls waited in anticipation

**LEXI:**

_The reason Rue wasn’t getting any texts from Jules… was because I deleted them_

The girls looked at her with utter shock

**CASSIE:**

_You did what?_

Lexi was clearly upset

**LEXI:**

_I didn’t know what to do, I figured if Rue got a text from her the same night of her O’D, she would only get worse. I couldn’t let Jules hurt Rue anymore! I love her for fucks sake_

Just then Lexi gets a text

**RUE (TEXT):**

_Hey! They just released me early! Can you come by? I rlly need somebody to talk to rn_

Perfect timing

**LEXI:**

_Umm.. she just got released, she wants me to come by_

The girls all motioned for her to leave; they knew that this was Lexi’s chance. Lexi quickly grabs her stuff and leaves the house, speeding over to Rue’s house.

**RUE (V.O):**

_What I didn’t tell Lexi was that I wasn’t just being released. You see after just 3 days, normally you wouldn’t be released after a second overdose, the doctors have plenty of tests to run and observations to make; In my case, we made a deal. The hospital let me out that night on one condition, that in 2 days I would be admitting myself to rehab… again. I agreed because I needed rehab, I actually wanted to go this time. I had a purpose now, I didn’t need my sobriety for just one person, I wanted to live. Why now suddenly? Lexi Howard, her dedication to me showed just how loved I am, I never realized it until now. I didn’t know if I LOVED her, but I certainly was considering it. Plus I needed to stay away from Jules who would inevitably come back, however I didn’t get so lucky. The night Lexi came to my house is one shit show of a night, I just wish I knew how bad it would’ve been._


	7. The Revelation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The long awaited revelation! How will everybody handle this? Lexi is at Rue's house, Nate is at the hospital. Jules is at the Howard's residence. What's going to come of this horrid night?

**INT-HOWARD’S HOUSE-**

**RUE (V.O):**

_Lexi grew up an only child, she wished she had a sister, one that was there for her anyways. Now she did have a sister, as you all know, however she never felt like she was her sister. When Lexi came to Cassie asking for advice, she was shut off; Because Cassie had her own shit to deal with. Now this wasn’t Cassie’s fault, nobody asks for these types of issues, Lexi understood too, she just needed somebody. Her mom wasn’t much help either because she was always drunk, too drunk to ever give advice on literally anything. So where do you go if your family is basically adviceless? You find a best friend, one that’s normal, caring… helpful. So she found the exact opposite in me, The unstable, borderline bipolar me. I didn’t understand at first why Lexi picked me of all people to be her best friend; But eventually we grew on each other and were inseparable until high school. Lexi was happy because she had somebody, a single fucking person in the world who talked to her and acknowledged her; And I was happy because she was a good person in general. Of course when high school began people change, and we already know what happened there sooo; Lexi was also changing, she realized that she didn’t want to be like her sister: To share her shitty taste in guys. Lexi loved her sister wholeheartedly, Cassie had a big heart, she just gave it away too often. Lexi realized however that she didn’t share her sisters taste because she didn’t even like guys, she didn’t even know if she liked girls for that matter. When she was asked out to Homecoming, I was the first person she called, thinking I was some sort of love guru or something. I tried to help the best I could, showing her how to French kiss, acting like I had a single fucking clue what love was. The thing she didn’t explain to me that night however was how awkward it made her feel, not because she was kissing her best friend casually type of awkward; but I’m kissing a girl I like type awkward. Of course I didn’t know this until way later so at the time I thought nothing of it. Funny how things work, I just wish she had spoken up sooner._

**EXT-RUE’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

What the fuck was Lexi doing? Rue just gets released and she plans on putting her emotional mess on top of everything else she has experienced? Rue doesn’t deserve this; she doesn’t deserve to have her heart fucked with any more than it already has; But when do you let this all out? Let it ball up and destroy you? Never tell her and live a depressing life without Rue? What would life be without Rue? Lexi couldn’t even begin to imagine how depressing that would be. Rue was literally everything, for being a drug addict she sure was addicting herself. When Rue overdosed, Lexi’s heart sunk… she was afraid that she lost her world. That dramatic wait for 4 days, while she lay unconscious in a goddamn coma were the scariest days of her life, almost scarier than when her dad got in the accident. Then everything was at a standstill, when Rue got out of rehab, Lexi wanted to run to her, to make sure she was ok… but she didn’t, she stayed away out of fear; Afraid that she would say the wrong thing, afraid that Rue wouldn’t want to see her, but Rue came to her… looking for her urine. Not exactly Lexi’s idea for romance but she knew Rue needed her help, and Lexi came to her rescue. No matter what Rue did, whether it be screaming at her or ignoring her completely, Lexi couldn’t help but love her. Rue was far from perfect, but neither was Lexi, she was in love with probably the most psychotic person she knew. It wasn’t Rue’s fault of course; she was just a little crazy sometimes. But everything turned out ok because she met Jules, and Jules did for Rue what Lexi thought she never could… she made her happy. As much as it hurt Lexi, she couldn’t help but feel happy for them, knowing that Rue was finally happy. She went manic, however when Jules got shit faced at the Halloween party, she locked herself in her room for a fucking week. Texting or calling Lexi at 3 AM in the morning was not ok… but it was ok if it was Rue. Lexi put up with her shit because they both needed each other; Plus Lexi thought it was cute that Rue remembered their nicknames. Watching somebody unravel like that is terrifying, especially when you know you can’t stop it; Lexi couldn’t do anything but watch. The Formal went pretty well… for the most part, Lexi got drunk for the first time, Cassie gave her some actual good advice; Overall that night was great. Until Rue Overdosed again, Lexi’s world crashed… again. It’s only been 3 days since the Formal and yet it feels like a lifetime ago. Lexi got to spend more time with Rue in the hospital than she has in years. Although it wasn’t the best of circumstances, Lexi still got to repair her friendship with Rue, to comfort her where nobody else could. It wasn’t exactly romantic, but it didn’t have to be, those three days woke Lexi up, she realized she needed to say something now, or never. Except here she was freaking out at the doorstep of the Bennett household, with absolutely no idea what to do: Should she confess? Tell Rue that she’s always loved her and that she always will? How would Rue respond? Would she tell her that she shared those feelings? Would she cry? Oh god Lexi couldn’t see Rue cry again; Watching Rue cry was like a piece of her soul was dying, Rue rarely “CRIED” cried, like the type of crying that is meaningful. Everybody cries, but to really cry is to give up, to give in to those dark thoughts everybody has and surrender control. Rue always tried to cry alone; she didn’t want anybody to see her as a “burden” like she said during the party. When Rue woke up and saw Lexi, she cried, and that made Lexi cry because well, they were an emotional wreck. Lexi felt that Rue was opening up to her, letting her see a side of herself that no one had seen before, it was melancholic beauty. Ok Lexi needs to stop rambling because she’s pretty sure that she has been standing here for like 10 minutes just staring. Shit the doors beginning to open, she must have knocked on the door subconsciously; Shit, shit, shit what the fuck was Lexi going to do? What would she say? What—

**RUE:**

_Hey Lex, please, come in I’ve really needed you_

Rue gives her that perfectly awkward smile that could melt the fucking ice caps. Lexi has to snap the hell out of it, so she accepts the invitation and walks in.

**INT-HOWARDS HOUSE-NIGHT**

After Lexi’s sudden departure, the girls had no idea what to do. One thing was for certain though, Jules was heading over to the house as they spoke, and they had no idea what to do. What would Jules say? What would the girls say more importantly, Jules had a lot to answer for: leaving rue in such a horrible state, fucking Nate’s dad, why did she go to the city in the first place? The three girls were so fucking confused, ever since the Formal everybody has been acting so fucking weird. Nate suddenly has a conscious, Kat’s not being a slut for once, Cassie’s been weird since the Formal (Maddy has no idea what happened); Rue’s well, Rue and Lexi’s suddenly love struck? What the fuck does Maddy have to show? She still doesn’t know what she wants to do with Nate, she doesn’t know what she wants to do with her life, what the fuck? The only thing Maddy has going for her is her sudden detective work against Jules. She just didn’t understand why somebody so confident in herself would just fucking leave; Why she would jeopardize Rue’s life like that. During the Formal, a giant alarm went off in her head when Jules declared Rue’s sobriety of 3 months… when she’d been out of rehab for 6. Rue was clearly dependent on Jules, Maddy thought so anyways.

**MADDY:**

_Ok what the fuck are we going to do?_

That was a good question

**CASSIE:**

_Well one things for sure, Jules is going to have to explain herself_

The girls all nod their heads in agreement; Jules was going to have to answer for a lot, and the night was still young.

**EXT-HOWARDS HOUSE-NIGHT**

Ok how the hell was this going to work? Jules just got off that horrible train ride, contemplating everything that has happened the past few days and holy shit, there’s a lot to unpack. She needed to ask the girls some questions; She was sure there was some for her too. Jules was exhausted but she knew this needed to be done, for Rue. Walking up to the door of the Howard’s household, Jules had no idea what was going to happen. Jules was scared, scared of what she’s done, scared of what still has yet to happen; This night would just be one big fucking mystery, slowly being unraveled until the climax. The person answering the door was a surprise, it was a very upset looking Maddy, she did not look welcoming.

**MADDY:**

_You’ve got a lot to explain to us_

Jules was too nervous to respond so a simple nod would have to suffice, Jules uncomfortably walks into the Howard household, into the unknown.

**INT-RUE’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

Shit, how was tonight going to go down? Sure Rue invited Lexi over, but she didn’t expect her to come so soon; Rue was still in her hospital gown, not the ideal outfit. Lexi didn’t seem to mind though, she still looked at Rue with that look, goddamnit why does she do that? She always has this way of looking at you with complete empathy, like she understands the pain you’re going through; Except Lexi is too smart to ever get involved with the shit Rue has. Rue has fucked up a lot of things, it’s a miracle Lexi has even stuck around considering how she’s acted recently. Thank god she has though because without Lexi, Rue would have nobody to talk to right now. Shit, that’s right they’re supposed to be talking

**RUE:**

_Sorry to text you so suddenly, the doctors just came in and told me I’m ok_

This seemed a little suspicious

**LEXI:**

_3 days after your second “you know” and they say you’re ok? Are you sure the doctors were ok?_

Shit she’s not buying it, time to create a diversion

**RUE:**

_Well you know, there’s plenty more people who need doctoring other than me; Hey are you hungry?_

Lexi was uneasy but

**LEXI:**

_Umm, yeah do you still have that pancake mix?_

Lexi wasn’t sure why pancakes were the go-to with them, but it always was. Ever since the two girls were young, they would have pancakes for breakfast together whenever they could; Of course this was when they were inseparable… the good days. This was before either of them had to worry about dead or drugged out parents, when life was simple… when it was good. Even now though, traditions always stood out, occasionally the two would have pancakes, just not nearly as often. To be quite honest, Lexi didn’t even really like pancakes, they just tasted like sugary sponges, but Rue seemed to love them so as long as she liked them, Howard would too. Grabbing the pan, the two got ready for their sugary delights, it didn’t matter how late it was; Subconsciously the two knew that after tonight, things would be different.

**INT-HOSPITAL-NIGHT**

Ok so the kid is finally with Fez, Nates’ job is complete. He’s taken his resident spot behind the window that’s apparently in every hospital room and just watched. Those two must have been through a lot together because they almost look like brothers. Nate remembers what it was like… to have a brother, to enjoy the company of another human being; It’s been far too long. Fez hasn’t even noticed Nate until now, looking at him with those empty eyes, It’s a look Nate has never seen before, he’s unsure if he’s happy or mad right now. All Nate can determine is that Fez wants him inside the room because he’s motioning to get the fuck inside.

**INT-FEZ’S ROOM-NIGHT**

**FEZ:**

_What’s up playboy, Ash tells me you helped him out today_

Alright well for now he’s calm at least

**NATE:**

_Umm, yeah. Rue told me what happened, and I owed the both of you, I—_

**FEZ:**

_Look me in the eyes when we talking Nate_

Why is Nate so nervous? Usually he’s able to remain calm but knowing what he’s done to this man is too much, avoiding eye contact was the only way Nate could talk to Fez, looks like he was going to have to try

**NATE:**

_I’m sorry Fez, I regret what I did, for real; I’ve tried to set things right but-_

Fez smirks

**FEZ:**

_Don’t worry about it playboy, we good, you helped Ash and I can’t repay you, so take dis as my forgiveness_

Fez offers his hand and Nate shakes it, Nate walks out of the hospital room satisfied, he’s finally making things right. The only thing that scared him was what would come next. Nate thought of those he loved: He really wasn’t sure who that was anymore. Obviously his parents had to be on that list: His father was beginning to act like a father, albeit the two haven’t had much time together since Rue’s “incident”, god he hated calling it that but what the fuck else could it be called… anyways his mother on the other hand he had no relationship with, he barely saw her and when he did he just grunted and would occasionally say good morning and goodnight. Other than his parents who did Nate consider a loved one? Maddy? The girl he manipulated for years? The one he thought he loved, the one he almost did, but still hurt her the most. Nothing Nate did could ever forgive what had happened, he damaged Maddy, she would never be the same even if she was all independent and shit, Maddy would never recover from the damage he caused. Nate promised himself that he would never go near Maddy again, at least if she was alone, he never liked hurting her, he nearly burst into tears every time afterwards, it was like some other person was taking over; His anger just exploded in these tiny little supernovas that would unravel into bigger and bigger plumes of chaos. Every bad thing Nate did would only create bigger issues for those around him, and Maddy was almost always involved; He just hoped it wasn’t too late for her to have some type of future. Moving on… Jules? The girl he hurt to the point that she is now in an unknown city? The girl that he fell in love with… for real in love, the girl he practically stalked for weeks, well not really stalked she talked to him as much he did her however she didn’t know WHO he was like he did. Every morning and every night the two would talk for hours, he didn’t pay as much attention to Maddy and she, Rue, however the latter really caused a rift in their relationship. Nate knew that Jules would hate him when she found out who he was, but he tried anyways, he finally mustered up the courage to meet her at The Lake… that was the biggest mistake he could’ve made. He made himself vulnerable to his feelings for once in his life, he opened up to a complete stranger… and it failed horribly. The first half of that fated encounter Nate truly showed himself, admitting his love for her, trying to comfort Jules, however he saw her reactions, he saw her disgust, her fear. Jules was afraid of Nate, and that hurt him, it hurt him so much that it festered into fury, and much like how he grabbed Maddy that night, he grabbed Jules, with threats. Allowing himself one last bit of happiness, Nate kissed the girl he loved, he embrace her for all she was, and it was the greatest 12 seconds of his life; Then he ruined it permanently. The rest is known, he was hurt by the way she looked at him, so he lashed out, threatening her, promising to ruin her entire life if she ever said anything about her encounter with his Dad. His father was the only person he hated more than himself at that time, but he wanted to hurt Jules, and sadly he did. He couldn’t consider her a loved one anymore though right? That would only be cruel for the both of them. Nate didn’t know what Jules would do if she saw him again, he knew she wouldn’t understand that he was different, he barely even understood it; Nate only wished for her well-being, more-so than he did Maddy; Because no matter what, Maddy still had that ruthlessness to her. She would do whatever it took to achieve what she wanted; Jules was too pure, too kind to ever show any form of negative emotion. Nate hoped that after everything was over, once he did what he had needed to do from the start, that everybody could move on and live happy lives… except there was one more person that just couldn’t escape his mind. She kept nagging at that part of his brain that shouldn’t be nagged at, the girl that was forever a mystery to Nate, the same girl who had Od’d 3 days prior; Nate needed to see her one last time, to make things right. To tell Rue everything, Nate had to see her in person, thankfully she just got released, and the only reason he knew that was because he just tried to go to her hospital room only to find it empty. Nate had a mission, one of redemption, he just hoped that she would listen to him.

**INT-HOWARD’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

Well wasn’t this a pleasant night, Lexi has run off and Jules has entered: The past love and the possible love never saw each other thank god… who knows how that might’ve gone. There was much to discuss, too much, the girls didn’t even know where to begin, so Jules initiates.

**JULES:**

_So, I know you all have a lot of questions, probably more than I do, so let me tell you what’s happened these couple of days and then all questions will hopefully be answered._

The girls looked at Jules uneasily, how could she seem so calm in a situation like this? Maddy was shit at hiding her emotions and she seemed particularly upset, Cassie was upset because Rue was practically her second sibling, so to see the girl that hurt her appear so unfazed… it really upset her. The only one who seemed to have her shit together was Kat, but that was only because surprisingly, out of all the “hot girls” sitting at this table, she was enjoying her life, no matter what has happened. After an awkward pause, the girls collaboratively nod their heads, accepting that this is the best course of action.

**INT-RUE’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

After a very messy and dysfunctional hour, the two girls had a plate of pancakes each to themselves; They kind of looked like pancakes at least, neither of them knew how to make pancakes so they winged it. The two were satisfied however, with the knowledge that they spent an hour in complete silence, working hard on pancakes, yet they felt closer to one another in that instant than either could remember. Rue was slowly opening to the idea of the two being together, spending the rest of their lives in an apartment somewhere, no matter what happened, even if the two were dating other people, at the end of the night they would sleep in the same bed.

**RUE (V.O):**

_The thought of us being together felt a lot like how I envisioned myself with Jules: except it had a few key differences. In that perfect future, I could still see myself fighting for her attention, trying to make sure that I was the one she loved, it felt like worth fighting at the time however that’s not how relationships are formed, or at least not how they last. As much as I loved Jules, I always had this creeping thought that I wasn’t good enough, I wasn’t “gay” enough for her. That was increasingly apparent until she met “her”. Jules praised Anna like she was some fucking messiah, like she woke her up and showed her the way. Nothing had made me more uncomfortable than when she talked about Anna before the formal. I figured she had found somebody else after we hadn’t spoke for almost 2 weeks, the look in her eyes when she apologized to me… I knew. But enough of that self-loathing, I was looking forward for once with Lexi. I could see myself with Lexi now, even if it took some time I truly appreciated what we had; I didn’t want it to end, but you know what they say._

After devouring what seemed like hundreds of sugary goodness, the girls laughed; Genuine laughter filled the room to the point that they almost forgot the circumstances of this meet… almost

**LEXI:**

_You know, we haven’t done this in years… yet it still feels like it did back then, us being kids. Back when everything was… easier. Back when—_

Lexi catches herself, she almost said too much.

**RUE:**

_Back when what? Don’t leave me hanging Howard_

Lexi gives Rue her best attempt at a non-awkward smile, which fails horribly, shit she might as well tell her because what’s there to lose?

**LEXI:**

_It’s nothing, I was just thinking about Homecoming, about when you taught me how to French kiss…_

Lexi drifts off, clearly trying to change subjects but Rue won’t let her

**RUE:**

_Annnnnnd? A lot happened that night, you’re gonna have to remind me_

Right now might as well be when Lexi admits it, she needs Rue to know one way or another and what better time than now?

**LEXI:**

_That’s when it hit me, that I liked you Rue… like more than a friend. That’s why I asked if it was awkward for you because I wasn’t sure if that was the reason, but-_

Rue simply smiles

**RUE:**

_Lex, you don’t have to explain yourself to me, you’ve made it increasingly obvious these past 3 days (smiling) I think I like you too Lexi._

**INT-HOWARD’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

After what felt like an eternity (It was really like 15 minutes, Maddy kept a mental note), Jules was done explaining herself. The responses she got were… unexpected

**CASSIE:**

_So… let me get this straight, because Rue, being the unstable, basically bipolar person she is, suggested to you that you run away together? And you thought it would be a good idea?_

Jules expected Maddy to react this harshly but not this time

**JULES:**

_It’s complicated, look I-_

Cassie was furious at this point

**CASSIE:**

_No you’ve had your time to talk, she backs out last second… because she has a brain… and you decide to leave anyways? All alone so you can have fun with this new girl? Do you realize how much that hurt her?_

The sad reality was that Jules knew exactly how much it hurt Rue… because it hurt her more to do that. Jules didn’t want to leave, she wanted to scoop up Rue and get rid of all their problems, live out in an apartment somewhere, away from Nate Jacobs, away from responsibility. When Jules saw Rue break down in front of her, it killed her to turn around and sit on that goddamn train; She wanted nothing more than to step off that train, but she couldn’t. Jules was under so much pressure, from Nate, from the fact that she lied to the fucking cops, from Anna, who she barely knew but for some reason couldn’t get out of her head. It was all too much, she needed an escape, as short-sighted as it was, leaving town for those 3 days were in her best interest. Jules couldn’t control Rue, she knew that it would break Rue, but she intended on coming back, she really did. That’s why she texted her the morning after, trying to make sure she was ok, when there wasn’t a reply Jules just assumed Rue had ghosted her for a bit; The next couple of days were a complete haze, it took her father finally calling her to wake her up. Maddy’s call only solidified Jules’ worst fear, that Rue had Od’d again. Learning that had shattered Jules, she tried everything in her power to be a good person, to put others before her; The one time she puts herself first and the love of her life almost fucking dies because of it. Nobody understood how shitty Jules felt, she felt like less than human, like she was fucking scum that deserved nothing but pain and sadness for what she did; Except the girls wouldn’t let her off that easy.

**MADDY:**

_Cassie chill out! Can’t you see she’s fucking upset?_

Cassie didn’t realize how harshly she spoke; Jules was a fucking wreck by the time she was done

**CASSIE:**

_And? Rue almost killed herself over Jules’ stupid mistake, don’t you think she should be a little upset?_

For once Maddy was being the empathetic one

**MADDY:**

_Ok, I’m sure she feels shitty enough, I didn’t see you saying shit when I was practically destroying myself over Nate or when YOU couldn’t decide between McKay or Daniel. We all fuck up, it’s our job now to pick up the pieces and move on_

Maddy rushes over to Jules to embrace the clearly upset girl, Jules jumped at first, not expecting such warmth from them. Jules has officially broke at this point, shaking so horribly she was afraid she might break a rib, there was practically no air in her lungs, so every breath felt like a uphill battle; This must’ve been what Rue felt like that night. Jules understood now, how it felt to love somebody so desperately that it hurt to see them upset. Jules wished she could hold Rue, to apologize so much that her voice gave out, only then could she ever forgive herself; Jules deserved pain she thought, as if she wasn’t in enough.

**JULES:**

_I—just—really fucked up guys, I don’t know—what to do_

The reality was that there was only one thing she could do: The girls didn’t know if she had the strength though

**MADDY:**

_There’s only one thing you can do Jules, you know that_

Jules looked up at Maddy, she understood… but could she?

**INT-RUE’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

Time felt like it froze when Rue declared her shared feelings for the smaller girl. Lexi felt small in this moment ironically, she never in a million years expected Rue fucking Bennett to say that; Every scenario she played out ended up in Rue breaking her heart, by reminding her of her one-sided feelings. Except, that didn’t happen: Is Lexi dreaming? She definitely has to be in one of those lucid dreams

**RUE:**

_You ok Howard? You’re freaking me out here_

Rue simply smiled, she knew Lexi was there, the news was shocking. Rue didn’t even expect to say that out loud, but it was true: Lexi Howard was always there for her, she ALWAYS supported her, even through her worst times. Rue had always felt something subliminally for Lexi, it was obvious that Rue was gay in some form, that’s why she was so comfortable kissing Lexi that night: It felt right. Except she couldn’t spend too much focusing on that because she had drugs, what Rue lacked in affection she filled with plenty of drugs. When drugs weren’t enough, Jules appeared, she descended from the heavens like a fucking angel, except it was too good to be true. Jules was a good person, there was no denying that, but they were meant to be friends, the only reason Rue felt so attracted to her was because she felt like the only one to understand her in years. Jules was an eye opener, Rue couldn’t hate her, she understood why she left; Rue was fully responsible for the fuck up that occurred shortly after. With Lexi though, spending those 3 days with her in the hospital when she should’ve been doing teenager things with her friends; It felt good to know that somebody genuinely cared. That wasn’t to say that Cassie or Maddy or any of them didn’t, but this was different: Lexi was the Jacob to her Bella (She seriously hated using Twilight references for anything but in this case it worked), Rue may have fallen for her Edward, but Lexi was always there to support her, to be there for her when she needed it the most. Rue saw a future with Lexi, one that was free of pain, one that was genuine love.

**LEXI:**

_Yeah—um can you repeat that Bennett there may have been some static_

Lexi’s continuation of their childhood trope was seriously adorable

**RUE:**

_I SAID, I like you too Lexi Howard, how many more times need I say it?_

Lexi bursts into tears, she heard her correctly, oh my god Rue likes her back? This was too much for Lexi to handle, she falls to the floor in sheer emotion; Happiness, surprise, fear of the unknown, they all crowded Lexi’s mind. There was still something tugging at her though, she needed to tell Rue everything if they were to have something genuine.

**INT-NATE’S TRUCK-NIGHT**

Nate was almost at Rue’s house, thank god for google maps, He felt oddly perverse for finding her address like this, but it had to be done; Unlike Tyler, Nate had a good reason to track down Rue. Two more blocks and he’d be there.

**INT-RUE’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

**LEXI:**

_Rue- You have no idea how happy this makes me- you really don’t… but there’s something you need to know; you need to know that I’m not a good person_

What could Lexi possibly be talking about? Nothing could change the pure heartedness that was Lexi Howard

**RUE:**

_Lexi there is nothing you could tell me that would change how I feel about you_

That only hurt Lexi more, but she had to say it

**INT-NATE’S TRUCK-NIGHT**

One more left turn and Nate would be there, he would finally be there. It felt like Nate had been driving all night, being trapped in his thoughts: How would he go about this? Just casually admit everything he’s been thinking about for the last couple of days? No way! But what else could be done? This was eating Nate up, knowing that he felt so strongly about her, when he had no right to.

**INT-RUE’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

**LEXI:**

_Just listen! When you were unconscious, you know like the night of the formal… I took your phone because I didn’t want a nurse or something to steal it… and that night Jules texted you_

Rue knows what she’s going to say but she understands that Lexi has to say it herself

**LEXI:**

_I didn’t know what to do because I thought that would only upset you more… so I deleted the texts_

Forcing those words out were some of the most difficult to express, but Rue doesn’t look surprised.

**RUE:**

_Lex, I know, I wasn’t fully unconscious you know, I told you, there is nothing you could say that would ever change how I feel_

Hearing that changes everything, Lexi can finally succumb to her feelings, she can let it all out and finalize their relationship. Lexi doesn’t even have to say anything for Rue to know what comes next.

**EXT-RUE’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

He’s Here! After what seemed like an eternity Nate’s finally at Rue’s house! Now the problem was, what the fuck was he going to say. He couldn’t help himself from walking forward, up the driveway; There was no plan, Nate just kept going, he had no choice. He would let everything out, if he wanted to change he had to admit it, make his feelings real. Nate was almost entirely sure Rue would deny him, but that was ok… right? The feelings would be out there, he could move on after that… right? Arriving at her doorstep he could hear muffled laughter, followed by what sounded like somebody collapsing. Shit! Was that Rue? Is she ok?

**INT-RUE’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

Suddenly the girls approach each other, closer.. yet cautiously. They were afraid of their feelings before this moment, Lexi had envisioned this kiss for years, how it would be under the perfect settings: How they would go on the perfect date and it would end in the best first kiss ever, except that wasn’t tonight. After haphazardly making that mess they regarded as pancakes, Lexi stupidly confessed her feelings, and to make it worse she made a fool of herself by breaking down into tears. Rue couldn’t be falling for her mess right? Except she was, the two were so close they could practically smell each other’s sugary breath. It didn’t smell good like most rom coms might explain it, but it didn’t matter, the two suddenly meet in the most unorthodox kiss mankind has ever seen. Emotions spilling out into this long-deserved moment, the desperate nature of it made Lexi feel like she might die if it ever ended. She never knew just how much she needed this, how much she needed Rue, she loved her whole-heartedly; Rue felt the same. Where Jules’ kisses felt empty, like her attention was elsewhere, Lexi was the exact opposite. Rue was desperate for this as well; she could tell how emotional this made Lexi because this was a kiss of absolute passion. Those 5 seconds felt like an eternity, the door behind them was practically shaking due to the passion involved, except it wasn’t passion that made the door open, it was Nate fucking Jacobs.

**NATE:**

_Rue are you ok? I heard a—_

He understood in an instant, how wrong he was; Rue wasn’t in any trouble or pain, she was experiencing love with… was that Lexi Howard? He never paid much attention to her, but he could definitely see why she was Rue’s choice.

The two suddenly break away, why the hell was Nate breaking into Rue’s house?

**RUE:**

_What the fuck are you doing here Nate?_

Nate wanted to respond, but he simply couldn’t; Everything hit him at once: How could he be that stupid? Of course Rue didn’t love him, nobody did! Of course she went for somebody else why the fuck would she ever even consider enemy number 1? His brain was like fucking mush, he couldn’t even process his surroundings, he barely even heard what Rue said. Before he knew it he was on the floor, crying. Why the fuck was Nate crying? How selfish could he be? Ruining her moment like this? He was a fucking child. Nate felt utterly alone at this moment, He knew then and now that he would forever live alone, in torment for what he had done.

**EXT-RUE’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

It took a lot of courage and convincing, but Jules finally made the move she needed to: She was practically running to Rue’s house. What scared her more was seeing Nate’s truck, his white fucking truck that only empowered his ego. Why was he speeding over to her house? Oh my god does he know that she knows? What’s he going to do to her? She finally crosses the street and arrives outside the house. Nate suddenly busts into the living room and within an instant Jules was up the driveway. She was going to save Rue from Nate, no matter what. Approaching the front door at what seemed like the speed of light, the first thing she hears is a massive BANG. Nate just fell to the ground.

**INT-RUE’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

Holy shit, this was not how Rue envisioned her night. Nate was on the floor, curled up like a fucking child, crying his eyes out; Lexi was hurriedly running to him, trying to make sure he was ok. Rue was frozen, not because of Nate, not because of Lexi.. but because Jules was at the front door. Suddenly within that instant, everything went black, Rue collapses and the world shuts off.

 **RUE** ( **V.O):**

_Like I said that night was a shit show, nothing I expected to happen.. happened. I just wanted a simple conversation with my best friend, and yet like true movie fashion, every person that impacted my life popped up at once. They could’ve at least given me a warning; my heart can only handle so much. I promise this has a happy ending… or at least for some; I just really wish things could’ve been different._


	8. The Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is it, the grand finale of the Aftermath, appropriately titled as the chapter as well. Almost everything will be revealed. Is Rue ok? Is anybody ok for that matter. How will the story end for our favorite characters?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is long overdue and i apologize for taking such a long time to finish but i sincerely hope everybody enjoys. I put as much time and effort as i could to make sure this was the best fucking story i could and i loved having the opportunity to write for such an audience.

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

**RUE (V.O):**

_I suppose there should be some kind of explanation as to why I blacked out that night; Why did I just fucking shut off after seeing Jules? After I explicitly said I would be ok with moving on. That’s a good question, I have an answer: When Nate broke down, and Lexi started to run… I was already frozen, the randomness of this was almost like a goddamn movie; I was shocked by that, but I was still ok, I could recover and talk to the both of them… then SHE appeared. Like a fucking angel (I know this is redundant) she appeared out of thin air, I thought she was still in the city, I thought she moved on; Just that quick look I saw of her I could tell: Jules was there to apologize, and I would accept stupidly because I could never stay mad at Jules. I don’t want to seem like some kind of freak but within those 5 seconds of consciousness, like 10 different things played out in my mind in light speed: Do I still love Jules? How would Lexi feel? What the fuck was I going to do with the both of them? I couldn’t break Lexi’s heart, but could I break Jules’? The only thing I could seem to focus on was of our best memory, or at least what I consider to be the best memory between me and Jules._

**INT-JULES’ ROOM-NIGHT**

This had to have been the happiest day of Rue’s life, her and Jules were finally in a place where neither of them were uncomfortable with their feelings; They both accepted that they had feelings for one another, or at least Rue believed they did, and that’s all she seemed to think of. The two had spent the entire day together, doing all of their favorite things, discovering WHAT their favorite things were. The day was magical, neither of them had a single worry the entire day, even though Rue was questioning just what the fuck happened during the night of The Lake, she didn’t pry, she knew that something clearly bad happened, but it wasn’t her business unless Jules made it. Jules was in a state of bliss, even though Nate had seriously freaked her out with his threats, she knew nothing would happen because she had no intent on going back to hurt his dad, she didn’t need to when she had Rue. Jules felt so dumb, not realizing that Rue had feelings for her, it was blatantly fucking obvious when she kissed her in her room the week prior, but Rue tried to stifle it and move on. Thankfully she didn’t because now the two have someone to complete them, Rue was happy after who knows how long, Jules was the same, neither of them had to worry about a thing because they had each other.

**JULES:**

_Rue.. that was the best day of my life, and that’s saying something_

Rue was glad to hear that, she shared the feeling, never had she experienced such a perfect day

**RUE:**

_I’m glad I could cheer you up, a day without the typical monotony of high school_

Jules thought it was adorable when Rue spoke like she was a 30-year-old grad student, Rue seemed to be smart whenever she actually applied herself. Jules could simply smile, the beauty of today simply masked any worry she had.

**RUE:**

_I hate to spoil tonight but I need to say something to you_

Jules looked at her quizzically

**JULES:**

_What?_

Rue didn’t want to spring this upon her so early, but she needed to, it was practically eating away at her

**RUE:**

_Look… I hate to be a downer or anything but… I need you to promise me something_

**JULES:**

_Rue… you couldn’t possibly put me down, just fuckin say it girl!_

Here goes nothing

**RUE:**

_I just need you to understand that you’re like the best thing to happen to me in a long time… and I never thought you would feel the way I do, so just please promise me that no matter what, we’ll stay the way we are_

Jules was confused

**JULES:**

_What are you talking about?_

Rue didn’t know why this meant so much to her, but it did, her face was beginning to show it because tears were welling up; Jules must’ve seen it because she was rushing to her, arms outstretched. The two embrace and suddenly Rue has a voice

**RUE:**

_I.. just want us to never hate each other… like even if shit goes down and we break up or whatever… that no matter what we always be friends… because I don’t think I could handle us hating each other, there’s so much bad in my life that I’ve caused and I just know that I would be the one to fuck this up and—_

Jules pulls away just enough so she can look into the eyes of her manic best friend/ maybe more/ you get the point.

**JULES:**

_Rue, you’re acting crazy, why would I ever hate you? You could never fuck this up, I’ve never felt this way about anybody before, especially for a girl, you must be pretty fucking special because I could never hate you Rue Bennett_

The two simply smile, standing there in absolute stillness. It felt like time had frozen, like they could feel the air molecules around them. Neither of them had experienced such euphoria, it was so intense yet calming, the love they shared for one another at that moment was like nothing they expected. They just stood there, basking in the warmth that came from the both of them, even when it got uncomfortable, they couldn’t break away out of fear, fear that they would always fight to match this moment; It felt like the peak, the peak of their love. Jules phone must’ve never shut off because music was still playing, the quiet yet beautiful tone of “A Song for You” was echoing throughout her room. The song was somber, yet it had a beauty to it just that they couldn’t simply explain; So that stillness turned to a slow movement, which turned into what would be called slow dancing. The two were inseparable, they could’ve never seen each other apart, and in that moment they made a silent promise: To always, no matter what, remain friends. The promise was sealed with a tender kiss, the two from that point on loved each other, until things changed.

**RUE (V.O):**

_You have to understand I’m a sucker for romance, especially memories that involve it. When I saw Jules that night, staring with such heart break, I simply shut off. I knew that she thought I hated her, that I had moved on so quickly and that I wouldn’t want to see her. Nothing had caused me more pain, not even her fucking leaving, because she might’ve been right. At that moment I simply couldn’t explain if I could love her again, if I could love Lexi at all; It was a complete crossroad, I couldn’t handle it._

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Well tonight was quite the event, for literally everybody involved. Lexi was spilling her emotions out for the first time; Nate freaked the fuck for the second time; And Jules… she messed with Rue’s emotions for the who knows what time. Lexi surprisingly, was handling this the best, although the love of her life had just collapsed on the goddamn floor; She took charge, made sure Rue was still breathing (she was, thank god), and tried to carry her to her bed. That’s where the problem was, Lexi was 5’4 and Rue was a tall 5’10, she wasn’t that tall but for fucks sake was she heavy. The only person capable of lifting the unconscious Rue without having a fucking hernia was Nate; Except he was… unavailable. Unavailable as in curled up in a fucking ball, silently muttering to himself. As confusing as this situation was, Lexi had to take control of it, and that meant snapping Nate out of his weird fucking trance. It didn’t seem like Jules was going to help because she was frozen on the couch, she has been since Rue’s collapse; So Lexi was going alone. Approaching the shaking boy, Lexi was nervous, in front of her was a person she had never met, never spoken to, yet knew so much about. Lexi knew what he had done to Jules, because it affected Rue, Lexi wasn’t dumb… she just didn’t worry herself about people like him. When Rue was in that weird manic state, playing Detective Bennett, she learnt the full truth. Nate was like a fucking legend in their school, everybody knew the tale, but they were too afraid to ever cross him. Lexi didn’t talk to many people; she tried her best to keep to herself and her sister, it was less dramatic that way. Getting back on task, Nate was still in his ball, practically shaking with whatever the fuck was going on inside his head. The only way she could get his attention was through physical contact, shouting at him seemed to do jack shit so she smacks the top of his head. The shakings stopped, but he’s frozen in place now, shit maybe getting his attention wasn’t the best idea.

What the fuck was this night? Nate came here tonight expecting to see Rue alone, trying to recover from her “Incident”. Maybe her mom would’ve been there, but she seemed alright, so he was sure she would’ve let him at least talk to Rue. That’s what he really needed to do right now, talk like at all, he was too busy being dramatic, wrapping himself in a goddamn ball. Nate didn’t understand what the fuck happened to him, but seeing Rue with Lexi just shut him off, he couldn’t explain why, he could barely explain his own feelings for fucks sake. This was different than his previous meltdown, this felt like it was completely his fault as in he was overreacting. Rue didn’t love him, he knew that, he understood that the chances of her sharing even positive thoughts about him were slim to none. Nate tormented Jules, which in turn tormented Rue, and now he was tormenting himself. He wasn’t really thinking, there wasn’t much to consider, Nate knew now that Rue had chosen Lexi; He couldn’t blame her. Lexi seemed like a really down to earth person, the times he went to the hospital, Lexi was always there like some kind of personal nurse. Whenever Rue needed anything, Lexi was there, taking care of her. Nate understood right there that she was in love with Rue, who else would torment themselves so much for someone so oblivious. The truth was, Nate had no problem with Rue not liking him, it seemed childish for him to consider it. He saw the way Lexi looked at Rue, even at school she was fucking obvious; She melted whenever Rue smiled at her, Rue was oblivious to Lexi’s true nature, but it still seemed like she cared about her. It was bound to happen, Nate knew Rue would find somebody good for her, somebody that could actually help her; He never stood a chance. Nate needed to get up, he needed to help Rue, she was fucking unconscious on the floor; Lexi was shouting at him to get up, but he couldn’t. He guesses she’s fed up with his lack of response because she’s stomping over to him. She smacks him pretty hard for such a small person, it almost hurts. It does the trick however because he’s finally stopped shaking like a sick dog; He finally musters up the courage to lift his head.

**LEXI:**

_HEY! Can you even hear me Nate?_

He could hear her; he just really didn’t want to move; Nate would’ve stayed right there for the rest of his life if he could.

**NATE (BARELY AUDIBLE):**

_I can hear you goddamnit_

Well at least he’s talking, that’s a good sign

**RUE (V.O):**

_Thank god Lexi wasn’t freaking out; I expected her to freak out like I did… well maybe not EXACTLY like I did. I of course was unconscious, so I didn’t witness any of this firsthand however her recollection of it later went a little like this: Nate finally got up, he carefully picked me up and put me in my bed. From what she told me, he was very uncomfortable; That Is a discussion waiting to happen, and it did happen later on. Lexi tried to seem like she was perfect the entire time, however I got her to admit that she cried about 3 times out of fear of my health. It was fucking adorable, she was afraid I had seriously hurt myself, surprisingly I didn’t. Jules on the other hand…_

Jules was fucking stunned, after finally building up the courage to see Rue, to apologize to her and all that; Nate fucking Jacobs ruins it, again! Jules was fucking terrified to see Nate zooming by, heading right towards the one girl he hadn’t directly hurt yet. The real reason she was scared though, was that she wasn’t AFRAID of Nate; When she saw his concerned face in the 2 seconds it took to pass her, Jules was in love again. She remembered ShyGuy, she remembered the instant chemistry she had with this mysterious boy, someone she had never met seemed to understand her so well. Learning later that he was Nate had absolutely shocked her, but it didn’t completely kill the feelings she had for him; It only managed to repress them when she was threatened. Jules thought that after The Lake that she would never want to see Nate again, and for a while she didn’t; Jules was with Rue, the one person who seemed to truly care about her. Rue was the best thing that had ever happened to Jules, and the same could be said for Rue. The two were inseparable, that is until Nate meddled again. Blackmailing her with those pictures, it was too much; She just freaked out. Jules didn’t want to just up and abandon Rue, but she did… and now what the fuck is she doing? She’s sitting on Rue’s couch, frozen, with Nate Jacobs and Lexi Howard. Nate was calmed down at least, Lexi snapped him out of whatever the fuck he was doing this time

**NATE:**

_Hey_ _…_ _are you ok Jules?_

Well Jules was going to have to snap out of it too

**JULES:**

_Uh... um yea, are you? Ok?_

Why is she talking to him so casually? That monster is the reason any of this is even happening… Except that’s not true; Sure Nate threatened her, and he was a piece of shit, but he didn’t force Jules to leave, that was on her. Why was he acting so casually? Rue fucking collapsed when she saw Jules, shouldn’t Nate be stunned at least?

**NATE:**

_Look, I know this is a lot for every one of us, as much as I would like to talk about it I think we need to focus on Rue right now_

He was actually making sense tonight

**JULES:**

_Yea_ _…_ _ok, what do you want to do?_

Lexi decides to intrude

**LEXI:**

_Well WE_ _’_ _RE not going to do anything, haven_ _’_ _t you both done enough to Rue?_

**JULES:**

_All I did was walk into the room after HE fucking kicked down the door!_

**LEXI:**

_Ok? And now she’s fucking unconscious in the next room over, because you two have your fucking issues. She just gets out of the hospital and you two decide it_ _’_ _s_ _the perfect time to stop by? Both of you are to blame for this anyways!_

Ok that may have been too much

**NATE:**

_Yes! I am fucking aware Lexi! Why do you think I_ _’_ _m here? Do you think I want to torment Rue any more than I have? Do you know how much it hurts me to think of what I did? How much of a fucking monster I am?_

The room was fucking electric, everybody was yelling at one another, the built-up and repressed emotions they all shared just blew up in each other’s faces. Each one had a major part in Rue’s life, for better or for worse. Jules was yelling and Nate, Nate at Lexi, Lexi at the both of them; Everybody was pouring out what had been eating them up the past few days. That is, until Rue stepped out.

**RUE:  
** _Can somebody please tell what the fuck_ _’_ _s going on?_

**INT-REHAB-**

**RUE (V.O):**

_So I feel like some truth should be spoken for once, after that night with the 3 fuck ups of my life, I submitted myself to a rehabilitation facility, the one I had previously gone to; Except this time was different, this time I wanted to get clean. I_ _’_ _ll spare you the boring details because well its rehab, but I_ _’_ _ve been there for 3 weeks so far and I_ _’_ _m feeling great, I_ _’_ _ve been talking to people about my shit; I_ _’_ _ve realized that people have gone through much worse than me. For once though it felt like somebody understood me, like they understood what I was going through, and they actually helped me through my shit; I still have a long way to go but things are looking great. My girlfriend_ _…_ _god it feels fucking weird calling her that_ _…_ _anyways she_ _’_ _s going be able to visit soon and I can_ _’_ _t wait to see her. I know they say an addict shouldn_ _’_ _t be involved with anybody for a while, which is why we are taking things extremely slow, I don_ _’_ _t want a repeat of last time._

**INT-RUE** **’** **S HOUSE-NIGHT**

Rue heard everything the 3 psychos had been screaming for the last 10 minutes, she really didn’t know how to respond, so she questioned just what the fuck was going on.

**LEXI:**

_Uh- um- Rue! You_ _’_ _re awake! Are you ok? You didn_ _’_ _t hurt your head at all did you?_

Clearly they were talking about her because the 3 were frozen pale; She wanted to talk to the 3 of them eventually but fuck it might as well get it over with.

**RUE:**

_No-I_ _’_ _m- I_ _’_ _m fine just a bit confused, what the hell_ _’_ _s going on?_

That was the question of the night wasn’t it? Jules and Nate were frozen, likely because they had no explanation for why they were even at her house; Why the fuck would those two be here? Nate wanted nothing to do with anybody, that was clear by his threats and his demeanor, but he was still so attractive; Personality wise Jules thought Nate could be better. Talking to him as Shy Guy, Jules came to understand that Nate was living a double life: Raging jock by day, emotional sweetheart by night. Jules had never felt so conflicted in her life, during the rave she fucking saw Nate, or she thought she did, it must’ve been the drugs; Or her inner psyche telling her that she’s still in love with Nate, or at least the idea of him. She really didn’t need that reminder, because there was always going to be that attraction; that cruel idea that she could love even the idea of somebody so EVIL. She needed to talk to him as much as she did Rue; She honestly could not give either of them a straight answer about how she feels. This drop in her gut, like a fucking boulder just held her back. Telling Rue back at the Formal that she was in love with Anna was basically her way of saying “I love YOU I just wish you’d change”. Rue’s reaction to that was heartbreaking, truly, Jules wished she didn’t feel that way, but Rue wasn’t perfect; Jules wasn’t either, she just couldn’t be the sobriety Rue was looking for. The complicated part was that when Jules went with Anna to the rave, she fucking saw Nate; Anna was the one actually there but she SAW Nate, this had to be her bodies way of saying “Hey you still have feelings for this person” But what the fuck was her body going through to think that. She never really had too much time to think about her feelings for Nate because well, he was fucking blackmailing her but… she still had to think about it. The three all try to explain their story at the same time, resulting in a jumbled mess.

**RUE:**

_Ok no, one at a time, you!_

She points at Lexi

**RUE:**

_You, with me now_

Rue motions to her room, they need to talk.

**INT-RUE** **’** **S ROOM-NIGHT**

To say the atmosphere was tense was an understatement, Lexi was still freaked out by what occurred less than 30 minutes ago, and Rue was just fucking freaked out in general. She goes home after her 2nd overdose, meets who she now considers her best friend in hopes of clearing the air, only to fucking kiss her. Literally the worst thing that could’ve happened was that because now Rue doesn’t know how to feel, she thought she loved Jules, shit she still might; Regardless of her fucked up conflicting feelings about Jules, there was Lexi. The girl who was always there for Rue, the girl she spent little of a decade with, liked her. And Rue wasn’t sure how she felt, the usual raging hormones aside, Rue was pretty sure she liked Lexi too, but she also thought that about Jules. This was where the hard part came in, should she risk her sobriety another time in pursuit of another love, or remain friends and make sure she can stay clean.

**RUE:  
** _Ok soo what the fuck was that?_

There wasn’t going to be an easy way to explain the events that occurred less than 30 mins, hell Lexi could barely explain it to herself. What was meant to be a nice night, ended in a distraught display of affection for 3 unfortunate people. Lexi worked up the courage to confess her lifetime torment, her very true affection for the one and only Rue Bennett; And it was ruined by her ex and her worst enemy. Lexi didn’t understand why, now SHE decides to show up, she was living her little fucked up life in the city. But god forbid Lexi have some form of happiness in her life, so of course Jules shows up now, she’s barely even spoken yet it seems she’s made more of an impact on Rue than Lexi ever has. I mean she fucking collapsed the moment she saw Jules, then again Nate was also freaked out so maybe it was the mixture of all three revelations.

**LEXI:**

_Oh you know the usual, Jules came in and fucked everything up_

Well that was a jarring way to start

**RUE:**

_For real Lexi what happened?_

**LEXI:**

_I AM being for real, we were… and Nate came in suddenly and started fucking freaking out; We went to check if he was okay and Jules was waiting outside… that’s when you-_

**RUE:**

_Yea yea I get it I collapsed, how long was I out? Is everybody okay?_

That was the million-dollar question wasn’t it? Lexi didn’t want to talk; she wanted to hold Rue and make sure SHE was okay; If anybody wasn’t okay it would’ve been her.

**LEXI:**

_Yes Rue, everybody’s fine, the psychopath is the one that brought you to your room and SHE just watched_

Pretty hostile but given the circumstances Lexi though she was justified

**RUE:**

_Look I know tonight has been a disaster so far but please, I’m trying to not hate anybody now_

**LEXI:**

_Yeah? And what about Jules? She hasn’t spoken a single word since she freaked you out and yet you seem to be just as distant as you were when…_

Lexi wanted to finish that sentence, but she couldn’t hurt Rue any more than she already was. It just so aggravating for Lexi, watching her best friend fall for this person who was THAT toxic for her, who had good intentions but left Rue in a state worse than death. Lexi was afraid that Rue would break at any moment, like a porcelain doll, one wrong move or word said, and she would be lost forever.

**RUE:**

_Yea I know Lexi, I realize that I act different when she’s around, but you have to understand, when I finally stopped taking drugs, Jules became my new one. The happy moments were some of the best I thought I’d experienced; the sad moments were some of the worst. When she left, it felt like I’d lost myself forever, so that’s why I did what everybody is so afraid to say, I OD’D BECAUSE OF HER_

Rue said that last bit especially loud so the two waiting outside could hear her (She had the right to be a little petty).

**INT-OUTSIDE RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Jules was already hating herself, knowing what she’s done, knowing that it was for fucking nothing. Her escape to the city lasted a few days and it’s novelty ran out, Jules realized that her place was here, to be with Rue. But did she share the same feelings? It was clear that Jules left an impact on Rue because she landed in the fucking hospital, Rue actually just reminded Jules of that a second ago. Did Rue still love Jules as she did? The sad inevitability of Rue’s rejection only made Jules want to run away and never come back. The childish side of her wanted to run, to leave like she did but permanently this time; Except Jules couldn’t do that, she needed to make sure Rue was ok. She also needed to talk to Nate so thank god he’s right next to her, looking like he wants to start a conversation but is clearly too nervous to start one.

**JULES:**

_Nate, are you ok?_

He looks at her awkwardly

**NATE:**

_No, not really, are YOU ok?_

This was going to be fucking awkward.

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

It never dawned on Lexi that Jules had that much of an impact of Rue; She understood everything she said though. To love somebody so wholeheartedly it hurt when they got hurt. She just wished Rue had opened up to her sooner, this whole shitty situation could’ve been avoided.

**LEXI:**

_Rue, you are one of the strongest people I know, not many people can survive what you’ve been through the first time much less the second. You have nothing to worry about now, there’s nothing she can say or do to hurt you anymore._

Thank god Rue had Lexi, she always knew what to say no matter how fucked the situation was. Rue for what felt like the first time in a while, cried, but not tears of sadness, those of joy, of comfort. Rue felt totally at peace, knowing that she had somebody like Lexi to be there for her; It felt healthy, it felt right. The two didn’t even have anything more to say, Lexi had explained it perfectly, Rue had nothing to be afraid of. No matter what her talk with Jules would be about, Rue wouldn’t panic, she wouldn’t get upset. All the tears had already been used up the past few days, the girls were happy with one another. They simply looked at each other, knowing full well the chaos that was waiting for them outside, and enjoyed the moment. They didn’t need to speak, they didn’t even move, they just looked up into each other’s eyes and smiled. A warm embrace followed, what felt awkward before felt normal now, the two could get used to the feeling, they just needed to sort some things out

**RUE:**

_We should get back out there, make sure everybody is alive_

Rue’s dark sense of humor never failed to entertain, the girls smile again and opened the door.

**INT-OUTSIDE RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

The girls walk out of Rue’s room, interrupting the conversation between Jules and Nate.

**JULES:**

_Look Nate, I’m glad that you’re a better person but—_

The look on Jules’ face when she realizes that there’s an audience is a mixture of shock and an awkward attempt to stifle her voice

**RUE:**

_What are you two talking about?_

Jules freezes up but thankfully Nate swoops in

**NATE:**

_We had some things we needed to iron out, no big deal… can we talk?_

Nate’s assertiveness never fails, changed or not. He awkwardly enters Rue’s room, almost hitting his head as he does.

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

The atmosphere between the two teenagers was interesting to say the least; No matter the circumstances, the thought that Rue would be talking to Nate in a non-hostile way was impossible. She had such deep hatred for Nate, she hated him for what he did to Jules, for how much of an asshole he was, she just plain hated him. Of course, this hatred changed after her second OD, Rue in a way woke the fuck up, she realized that there was no sense in hating anyone really. Her life was too short to be concerning herself about what Nate Jacobs is doing, or for that matter, what Jules was doing. Sure It hurt, being left like that, but Jules had her own fucked up life, with her own fucked up reasons. It didn’t make it ok, but it gave a reason at the very least and that helped. Nate on the other hand, still scared Rue, although he cried and said he changed, she was still unsure; Rue was paranoid that at any moment he would switch back and fucking attack everybody. The odds of that dark scenario were pretty low, but in Nate’s case, still very possible. Looking at him now however proved her wrong, those cold eyes have been replaced by warm ones, he genuinely seems like a different person. Rue hopes that this is to stay, not only would it be easier not having to worry about a psychopath plotting his moves against her; But to see him improve as a person only inspired her to improve herself. The only mystery was , why was he here, at her house of all places?

**RUE:**

_So Nate, to what do I owe the honor?_

Nate shifted uncomfortably; he knew he wanted this conversation, but he didn’t really know what to say

**NATE:**

_I just figured I’d come by after I dropped off Ashtray—_

**RUE:**

_Wait you found Ash? Is he ok? Is Fez ok?_

Nate took a long sigh, this was going to be a long night

**INT-OUTSIDE RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Lexi was in extremely deep thought, leaving Rue’s room she had way too many things on her mind and no time at all. First off, she hated Jules, and she hated the fact that she hated Jules because she never hated anybody. Lexi made it her goal to never have such strong feelings against a person, it just wasn’t right to dislike a person that much. The reason she hated Jules was selfish, she was afraid that she would never be as good as Jules; She would always be compared to her. Lexi would always be insecure about this, Jules was the first, she changed Rue for better or for worse. Lexi hated that she was insecure, she hated that she kept using the word hate but fuck It; Lexi was conflicted. The saddest part was when Lexi thought back to her earliest memories with Rue, when they were in elementary school and swore they would be bestest friends forever. The two could always make each other smile and laugh, no matter how bad of a day they had, Rue could be her own person. That didn’t last long past high school however, where Lexi was only useful for her pee and the occasional punching bag. Lexi hated being yelled at by anyone, but when Rue did it, it felt much worse. Lexi understood why, Rue needed somebody to yell at, to take her bottled up rage and pain out on a person, and the person just happened to be Lexi. In some fucked up way, Lexi saw it as she being the only one Rue was close enough to, to be able to yell and hurt her but still have her bounce back unscathed. In their own little fucked up way, the two were friends, was it toxic? Maybe, but it worked, like most friendships there were problems; But there wasn’t nothing they couldn’t fix. Lexi felt horrible the days after having their friendship put into question, when Rue asked the rhetorical “What makes you think we’re best friends?” She knew Rue didn’t mean it but it still fucking hurt. Lexi spent the next couple of days with only negative thoughts, questioning why she was even trying, why she bothered being friends with Rue only to be shot down so horribly. But she realized the reality that Rue needed her as Lexi did; And that was enough encouragement to keep trying. Thankfully she did because Rue needed her now more than ever; Lexi put on her happy face and tried to make Rue feel better. To be completely honest, it helped Lexi out a lot, sitting there in the hospital room, comforting Rue. It helped her sort out her feelings, it allowed her to get closer to Rue; At first she thought she was manipulating Rue but in actuality, Rue was getting closer to her by herself. Rue seemed to realize right away that Lexi liked her, maybe because for the first time in god knows how long Rue actually had to just sit there and talk to her. Cassie always teased her about her crush on Rue, saying how obvious it was and how it was only a matter of time. Lexi never seemed to understand until her time at the hospital, how tripped up on words she got, how awkward she was in general. Rue told her that was cute, and it made Lexi feel a lot better in all honesty. The threat of Jules’ return still scared Lexi however, she wasn’t sure what would happen if they ever reunited. Lexi saw the way Rue acted with Jules, she practically depended on her, this was increasingly apparent especially at the Halloween party; Lexi saw the way Rue broke after Jules had her little episode. Whenever Jules was happy, Rue was too, but whenever she was upset, Rue followed. It wasn’t healthy, her dependence on Jules was toxic, neither of them deserved it. Lexi couldn’t necessarily hate Jules, she hated her actions, the mistakes she made; But on the other hand, Lexi had made plenty of mistakes. Most of them had occurred not too long ago, deleting those text messages, lying to Rue, confessing now of all times… Lexi had made too many mistakes. That’s the part that scared her, would her mistakes prove to be more detrimental than Jules’? Could any of the damage done be repaired? For either of them? Lexi had loved Rue for what seemed like forever, but she ever let her go? These questions rattled her brain, like setting off a BB gun in a bottle and quickly closing it… ok that was a pretty shitty analogy but so was her thought process, jumbled and confusing.

**JULES:**

_So… are you two like, a thing now?_

Lexi’s chaotic thoughts gets interrupted by the one and only Jules, it’s like she knew she was thinking about her extensively.

**LEXI:**

_What… do you mean by… a thing?_

Jules’ innocent yet inquisitive smirk spread across her face

**JULES:**

_You’re together right?_

Hearing somebody say that out loud is was what freaked Lexi the fuck out, all this time, even when they kissed, Lexi wasn’t sure of what they were; She was too afraid to assume so she just went with whatever Rue wanted.

**LEXI:**

_Umm, yea I guess we are, is that going to be a problem?_

Lexi may have been a tad too aggressive there but damnit she was nervous, not only of the fact that she just confirmed that Rue was her girlfriend (Which hasn’t even been confirmed by her yet soo) but also of the fact that Jules, Rue’s first fucking love is the one asking the questions

**JULES:**

_I’m glad, I kind of figured you liked her, if Rue chose you, she made a good choice_

Such kind words from Jules was frightening, Lexi assumed there had to be some kind of ulterior motive, sabotage maybe?

**LEXI:**

_Thanks? Um is that ok with you Jules?_

She couldn’t be a complete asshole to Jules, the girl wasn’t evil for god’s sake

**JULES:**

_Yea… yea that’s fine, I figured I kind of broke things off for good, so it was only a matter of time. As long as Rue’s happy right?_

Lexi could sense that this wasn’t ok with Jules, the sadness in her voice gave it away. This was bound to happen, Jules making her feel bad, but it was warranted, this has all happened extremely fast, but maybe it’s better that way

**JULES:**

_Maybe it’s better that this happened so fast, that way she can recover, I just hope I can be friends with you two_

Ok this whole mind reading thing doesn’t seem so farfetched, Lexi understood what she wanted, she wanted to be in their lives, one way or the other

**LEXI:**

_Of course we’ll still be friends Jules, I just hope Rue will be as accepting…_

Lexi didn’t want to say that, but the reality was that she didn’t know how Rue would respond, she only hoped that she wouldn’t hate Jules

**LEXI:**

_You know, I used to hate you, or at least I thought I did… I realized that i didn’t though, so_

**JULES:**

_Oh.. well that’s good to hear, then there should be hope for Rue_

Jules felt awkward talking to Lexi but there wasn’t much else to do while they waited, so they continued.

**INT-RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Nate’s explanation of his day with Ashtray and Fez took a whopping 10 minutes to explain, but It really felt like 5. He was struggling to talk about himself so proving to Rue that he did good helped a lot. Taking care of the situation with Mouse certainly freed up Fez but he still had to worry about his explanation for showing up in an ER with a gunshot wound; Nate wasn’t too concerned because he knew Fez was smart, he’d find a way out. The scary part was to come

**NATE:**

_So Ash and Fez are ok, everything is taken care of…_

Rue was still waiting for more; he didn’t just come to her house to tell her all this

**RUE:**

_And? How does this relate to you being at my house in the middle of night?_

Yup, the scary part, Nate really didn’t really know what to say but he had to say something.

**NATE:**

_Seeing Ashtray rush to Fez like that reminded me of my little brother, how I used to have somebody that depended on me, somebody that helped me. You sending me to save Ashtray had to be some kind of sign, for me to meet Ash like that, it reminded me of better times, and I wanted to thank you_

Rue felt really guilty about herself now, Nate had told her about his little brother, it truly was horrific what happened to him; In a way It was probably a good thing he did that though, maybe it gave it some closure

**RUE:**

_Shit, Nate I didn’t even think about that, I’m so sorry for making you do that I—_

**NATE:**

_You don’t need to apologize for anything, I should be the one apologizing for everything_

Getting that off his chest really helped, truly he wanted to tell her how he felt but he decided against it. His talk with Jules really woke him up, Nate realized that he didn’t need to be in a relationship to feel complete, he just needed to accept himself for who he was. Nate grew up with the fucked-up mentality that he wasn’t a man until he conquered somebody, like he saw his father do to all those boys in the videos. That’s why he always had to have a girl by his side, otherwise Nate didn’t know what to do with his life. Nate asked Jules how she was doing and all that generic shit you ask somebody you’re uncomfortable around; He didn’t know how to act around Jules. The time he spent with her as ShyGuy helped him a lot, he realized that he wasn’t perfect that he wasn’t the toxic straight male as Maddy described it. He didn’t view Jules as that girl who used to be a guy, he just saw her as a beautiful woman who deserved far better than him. He still asked her if she wanted to give it a serious chance, being with him. She seemed to understand his change, she said she had been through something similar when she transitioned; That wasn’t what scared her away. It was what he had done that really affected Jules. Before their conversation was interrupted, Jules had said “but”, that one word already gave him the answer he needed, she couldn’t be with him, and he realized that he couldn’t be with her either. It wouldn’t be good for either of them right now to date anybody really, Nate was still sorting his shit together and Jules had to get over Rue; It made sense that she was turning him down, but it still hurt. Plus the fact that he probably wasn’t going to be around much longer didn’t help, you can’t be with somebody where he was going. Nate was going to apologize to Rue, that was all, he needed to know she forgave him, to the best of her ability anyways; Anything more than that was asking too much. Nate could move on, he wanted to move on, the plan was being set into motion already, all he needed to do was go.

**NATE:**

_Everything I did these past months was wrong, threatening Jules, hurting Maddy, I’m a monster, changed or not-_

**RUE:**

_You’re not a monster Nate you—_

**NATE:**

_I am, there’s no pretending, what I did was horrible, and I am truly sorry for it; I will spend the rest of my life regretting my actions so just know that if you need anything, anything at all… no matter where I am I will try to help_

Rue was stunned, he’d talked about how apologetic he was, how regretful he was but never had it seemed so genuine as it did now. Nate was truly moving forward, she didn’t know what he meant by where he was, but she decided it was probably best not to ask.

**RUE:**

_Well that was far more emotional than I expected Nate, I forgive you, if that’s what you need to hear to move on than just know I forgive you for what you did_

That’s all Nate needed to hear, he smiled, genuinely, he was content with himself. No other words needed to be said, the two just looked at each other, as two fucked up equals, but equals, nonetheless. Rue puts her hand out, extending for a handshake; Something formal was what they needed to end things on. Nate awkwardly connects, easing into the shake and they end things there, no matter what happens now, the two once rivals will leave as equals. Nate walks out first, the blood rushing to his face, he doesn’t want anybody to know what’s coming next.

**INT-OUTSIDE RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

With Nate leaving the room, Lexi froze, when he entered Rue’s room she had doubts about the conversation that would ensue; Seeing him leave now, she could see how changed Nate was, he truly was a different person.

**NATE:**

_I’m gonna head out, got some things to take care of_

Nate looked at the 3 girls somberly, this was going to be the last time he saw them, he wanted to get one last good look. Rue was finally improving, for real this time; Lexi seemed like a pretty decent person and he wished her the best. Jules was his biggest concern, but he could see by her smile that she was going to be alright, it almost seemed like she knew what he was going to do; The girl was smart, but could she know? He decided he would leave it at that, knowing that the damage he dealt never broke them, he could be content with that. The girls waved goodbye as Nate left the house, it took everything in his power to not buckle his legs, he was fucking nervous. He understood he had to do this but fuck if it wasn’t scary, trying to maintain that calm composure was difficult, but it was nothing compared to what came next. He reaches for his phone as he gets in his truck, scrolling down to Maddy’s number

**NATE (TEXT):**

_I’m done, go down there and tell them everything, I’ll meet you_

Maddy got the message instantly and knew what to do, she leaves the Howard house quickly without a word and heads down to the police station; Maddy steadies herself, everything was going to come out, would it be too late? Who knows, but she had to try.

**INT- RUE’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Now for the moment of truth, the finale of Rue’s triad of difficult conversations, it will certainly be the hardest to have. Rue doesn’t even know where to begin, the other two Rue at least had some semblance of a coherent thought but with Jules… all logic flew out the window. Jules was obviously nervous too; this was the first time the girls had met in… shit it really hadn’t even been that long, but it felt like it had been months. Rue wasn’t necessarily scared, she had moved on, it was fairly soon but the faster the better in her eyes. Jules thought that it was probably best that Rue moved on this fast, so she didn’t have second thoughts and leave in a conflicted state. It was clear who Rue chose, it didn’t need to be said, Jules was content with this, she thought she’d be upset but really it was for the best. They were better off friends, and that was fine by the both of them. They just needed to verbally confirm this.

**RUE:**

_So… how have things been? How was the city?_

**JULES:**

_Well, it didn’t work out, I realized that my place was here, with you and everybody else_

**RUE:**

_Look Jules, I thought it was obvious that me and Lexi were—_

**JULES:**

_No that’s not what I meant, I know you two are a thing, we were talking all about it; I meant to be with you as a friend… if that was ok_

That was good to hear, but Rue still needed to vent

**RUE:**

_Well, I want that too Jules, I just really, REALLY am trying here, to not be hurt, to not remind myself of how much I loved you, of how much I wanted to be with you_

It felt good to let this out, the two girls understood why it had to happen, Rue was obviously hurt still but spilling this out let her move forward.

**RUE:**

_I really did love you Jules, never forget that, I certainly won’t; of course we can be friends Jules, I would like nothing less_

Hearing that put into words made Jules cry, a mixture of sadness and relief; Of course Jules too was hurt by this whole situation, but it only made sense that they remain friends, they were complete opposites of one another. Jules hated to think about it, but it was true; Jules was too open, too polyamorous, no matter how much she loved Rue, it would never be enough. That wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, Jules just had a lot of fucked up things happen in her life to turn into the person she was today, she sought constant attention, and even when she got it, it wasn’t enough. Enough about her little fucked up psyche, Jules understood that this all had to happen, and was glad that it did. Rue rushed over to Jules to hug her, to hold her and make sure she was ok, which was far more than she felt she deserved. Nothing had to be said in those moments, the two girls accepted at that moment that they had moved on, they COULD move on. Who knows, maybe Jules will find someone out there as “open” as she was, it would be hard to compare them to Rue, but if Rue could do it, Jules could too.

**JULES:**

_I hate everybody else in the world but you_

Rue smiled brightly and repeated the phrase the two had created for one another, leaving her room, Rue felt calm for the first time ever. Gone were the thoughts of “what if?” and constant buzzing of anxiety. Rue’s head was clear, she could feel comfortable in her thoughts, it was an amazing feeling. Rue knew that this moment would be a happy one, but it had to end in sadness, because Rue had to go to rehab the next day, she would get one final day with everyone, then the road to improvement would begin.

**INT-THE COUCH-MORNING**

That night had been the most emotionally chaotic the girls had ever experienced; it didn’t end until 1:30 in the morning. Jules had called her dad and had him pick her up, of course he had questions and was concerned about her well-being, but he also understood she needed sleep, so he waited until the next morning to inevitably interrogate her. Rue and Lexi on the other hand were too tired to really move anywhere so they decided the couch was comfortable enough. The bed felt too intimate for a relationship that just started so the couch was a nice medium. They passed out in each other’s arms almost instantly, waking up to the best sleep of their lives. Rue’s mom had gotten home to the two girls unconscious, so she decided to leave it and go to sleep as well, Gia was soon to follow. When they finally woke up, Rue almost forgot she had a deadline to follow, she was going to visit Fez and announce to them she was going to be in rehab for the rest of the school year, then spend the rest of the day with Lexi. She didn’t know what they were going to do but it was going to be fucking amazing because Rue had one more day and goddamnit it needed to end on a high note. All of this was going according to plan, Lexi had actually woken first and started making pancakes; And then Rue woke up to a startling news report. In bright red letters was the headline: “Nathaniel Jacobs, son of Calvin Jacobs, arrested for assault, and multiple other charges”

**RUE:**

_What the fuck is this?_

Lexi knew, Nate told her the night previous, he trusted that she would keep it a secret until the next morning, he wanted her to explain it to Rue personally.

**LEXI:**

_Nate knew that no matter how much he changed, he would be a fraud unless he came clean, he planned this all out with Maddy to free Tyler and put Nate in jail. He didn’t know how long he would be there but, he didn’t seem to care_

This was a fucking shock for Rue

**RUE:**

_So he’s just going to rot in a cell for the rest of his life? That doesn’t sound like redemption to me_

Lexi walks over to Rue, pancakes in hand

**LEXI:**

_It’s what he wanted, it’s what he thought was right, trust me it was a shock to me when he told me, but I agree with him, he needs to pay for his actions, one way or another_

Rue understood this, it wasn’t right that Tyler was in jail for something Nate did, but it wasn’t right that Nate was going to jail either. In some fucked up way, Rue envisioned a world where no one was in jail and everybody was their best selves, it was clear that wasn’t going to happen. She couldn’t do anything but accept it, she didn’t know how long he would be in that jail, but she hoped he could still live some semblance of a life afterwards. The two girls share pancakes one last time, Rue silently freaking out about how Lexi would react.

**INT-FEZ’S ROOM-AFTERNOON**

Fez woke up to Rue and Lexi’s warm smiles, the two were unusually close to each other, which only meant one thing

**FEZ:**

_Yo, whats up? You two a thing now?_

Lexi laughed

**  
LEXI:**

_Why does everybody call it a thing?_

Rue laughed at that; “thing” was the only way to describe it

**RUE:**

_Yes Fez, we are dating, now its official_

Fez was delighted by this news

**FEZ:**

_Shit… I’m happy for you kid, you two both deserve happiness_

Rue was happy to hear of Fez’s approval, she always thought of him as her older brother. The shitty thing was that now the bombshell had to be dropped, she didn’t want to ruin this moment but

**RUE:**

_Look, I know you’re going through your own shit Fez, and Lexi I’m so glad that we can be together, but I have something I need to tell you both_

**LEXI:**

_What is it?_

Rue was uncomfortable but fuck it

**RUE:**

_I’m going back to rehab…_

Rue shut her eyes, expecting some loud “WHAT?”, the typical response when something this monumental is announced

**LEXI:**

_Well I kind of figured you’d have to_

**FEZ:**

_Yea me too kid, you go back and help yourself for real this time, I don’t want you near no kinds of shit for now on_

This was probably the better outcome that Rue envisioned

**RUE:**

_Well, way to ruin the moment guys, I was really hoping for something on the dramatic side_

Lexi laughed and Fez tried to, wincing at the still present bullet wound

**LEXI:**

_Well with you it’s always dramatic so what do you expect?_

Rue nudged Lexi for that, it was true but still funny

**RUE:**

_Well Lexi, we still have a lot to do today, Fez I don’t want to waste anymore of your precious time_

She goes in for a hug and he holds onto her tight

**FEZ:**

_Be strange, but don’t be a stranger kid, I love you_

**RUE:**

_I love you too Fez, I’ll see you in a while_

Fez smiled as the two girls walked out, he knew they would be ok; He was going to be as well. Rue held onto Lexi’s hand tight, expecting to spend the rest of her day with the new love in her life, not thinking about anything but forward. Would Nate ever get out of prison? That wasn’t a question Rue could answer for herself, she just had to wait and see. She knew Jules and Cassie, and everybody would be fine for the few months she’d be gone, Rue couldn’t wait to see herself, fully sober. The future was scary, but with Lexi at her side, Rue knew she would survive, all she had to do was live for herself

UNTIL THEN,

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope you guys enjoyed this end, just know that this is not THE end. There may be a continuation some where along the line, i would just like to know if it is wanted. Any comments or critiques would be lovingly accepted, i always love advice. Look out for another work i will hopefully be putting out within the next couple of weeks (the quarantine really helps writing). I sincerely loved having this opportunity, i never thought i would get this far with my first fic, i began this story for me, but i ended it for you guys.


	9. The Return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 3 Months later...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo I know i made the last chapter seem like the ending but... i didn't feel like ending it. Sooo more chapters will be coming hopefully soon.

**RUE (V.O):**

_First thing, yes I know I made it seem like we were ending our little adventure at the 8 th outing… shit I thought so too. Turns out though, my life is never going to be calm, or normal, or any semblance of happy. “Rue, what the absolute fuck are you talking about?” you might ask, well we wouldn’t have a story without a beginning, so let’s all turn to page 18 in our fictional textbooks and start another grand adventure! Believe it or not, this odyssey of oblique teenage lives is worse than the last! Yes It CAN actually get worse than me overdosing a second time…_

**INT-REHAB-**

Rue stared out the frosted window of her room, thinking of the warmth she would soon feel. The facilities A.C unit kept the entire building at a near fatal 69 degrees, this was meant to stimulate the senses, it wasn’t really that cold to everybody except Rue; This was due to her embarrassing muscle to fat ratio that was damn near 1:1. It has been 3 months since her voluntary admission to the Southern California Rehabilitation Facility, which was heralded as one of the best in the area.

**RUE (V.O):**

_The funny thing about Rehab facilities is they all claim to be the best… you’re basically admitting you’re the best at being the worst. Nobody likes Rehab, I certainly have had my experiences with it, but this is for me this time. The first time I went was involuntary, not like I had a choice I mean overdosing tends to rid you of your decision making; This time though, I wanted to get better. I wanted to get better not just for myself, but for my family… for Lexi. 3 months into our relationship and it still feels fucking weird saying her name, like her name has some power now that we are together._

Today was exactly day 80, 10 days left and Rue could leave, the scariest thing though was that she didn’t know if she wanted to leave; She wanted to leave because she wanted to see Lexi more than 5 minutes at a time, she wanted to leave so she could be with her family. But what terrified her was if she could handle the outside world, if any little thing would send her into a spiral eventually into relapse… that COULD NOT happen. Rue would rather die than see this happen a 3rd time, hell she was sure she would just die looking at drugs now. Today would be exactly as it was yesterday, she would wake up, shower, try to look presentable, attend whatever scheduled meeting was for the day, then she would have some sort of free time, usually spent thinking about how she would be outside the walls of her self-imposed prison. Thankfully, there was one change to today, something that happened once a week that made it worth living, she would get to see Lexi, albeit for like 10 minutes max but goddamn did it make the other 10,070 minutes worth trudging through. Mostly they talked about what they were going to do once she was out, or what Lexi had been doing the rest of the week. It’s refreshing to hear about the outside world from another person’s perspective… despite how pretentious that sounds.

**RUE (V.O):**

_Cause I know you’re curious, everyone sounds to be doing really good. Cassie has handled her breakup with Mckay fairly well, she still cries every once and a while when she sees something that reminds of her of him but that’s just girl problems. Kat from the little I’ve heard is still living her dream life with Ethan… who by the way seems to be like literally the coolest boyfriend in the world. It’s sad that the one guy I don’t really know seems to be the only decent one in all of East High. Maddy is actually doing arguably the best, she’s in a support group for abuse victims (she can finally admit that what Nate did was abusive) and they’ve been nothing but good for her. She’s also remained single, which is an achievement in its own right, let’s hope her next man doesn’t share the negative qualities of her last. Speaking of the man himself, Nate… He’s awaiting his trial actually. You see his fucked up little decision to turn himself in has caused quite the controversy for his father. I personally think the only reason his dad cares is because it’ll make him look bad, having a son convicted of blackmail and assault. One of the first things I’m going to do when I get out of here is talk to him, because I need to know if the newly changed Nate Jacobs, the guy who isn’t actually a complete shithead, is going to go to jail for the majority of his life. This might be jarring to some, but I don’t want to see him rot in jail, no matter what he did in the past, he has fought tooth and nail to prove me wrong. If you asked me pre-OD2, I would’ve imagined him burning, tied to a chair with me and Jules shooting him to death… now I just want everyone to be ok; Call me sappy but I’d love nothing more than for everybody to get along with one another. It might be the Rehab talking, but there’s no benefit to us living in the past, we just have to live with it and make sure never to repeat our mistakes. Where was I? Oh yeah! Lexi! Where the fuck do I even start with her? After I voluntarily admitted myself to this joyous facility, Lexi has made every attempt to see me; Every week she gets to see me face to face, it’s not for too long but It means the world to her, so it means the world to me. Her whole demeanor has changed since she decided to start… dating me: Even after 3 months the notion that I am dating Lexi Howard is so fucking foreign to me, like who the fuck would willingly be in a relationship with me? Surprisingly, I Seem to have a good influence on her because I’ve never seen her this happy, her smile rivals even the original smiley face itself (from now on Lexi Howard will represent the smiley face emoji)._

**LEXI:**

_Rue! Are you even listening?_

Amidst all that rambling to herself, Rue failed to realize she was sitting down with Lexi, already wasting 3 minutes of their time.

**RUE:**

_I’m sorry Lex, what were you saying?_

The understanding yet annoyed girl sighs

**LEXI:**

_I was trying to plan out our first official date when you get out.. which is in 10 days right?_

Rue didn’t deserve Lexi, somebody this pure could not possibly love somebody as fucked up as her right? The funny thing was that Rue really didn’t think of herself as fucked up anymore, she’d met people that were worse off than her in high school and ESPECIALLY in rehab; Compared to Lexi though, anybody would seem unworthy. She was the best thing that could have ever happened to Rue, this sounded redundant considering she thought the same about Jules, but now Rue could live her own life. As much as she loved Jules, Rue didn’t live, she simply occupied the same space as Jules, it was always about Jules; And this wasn’t her fault necessarily, Jules didn’t have the emotional intellect to register the affection Rue gave her. Thankfully, they had both moved on, in fact Jules was currently making plans to become a fashion designer someday, Rue knew that if anybody had the potential, it was Jules.

**LEXI:**

_Goddamnit Rue are you talking to yourself again?_

**RUE:**

_Nooo definitely not I’m a hundred and twelve percent committed to this conversation…. So what were we talking about_

That managed to crack a smile out of Lexi.

**LEXI:**

_You know, if you weren’t at risk of another relapse, I would dump your ass_

The two girls break out into love-struck laughter, alerting the staff, thinking something was wrong. The two shut up quickly only to laugh even harder.

**INT-HOWARD HOUSE-NIGHT**

Cassie is completely clueless as to what she wants to be when she grows up. She never really thought past anything other than what her boyfriend at the time wanted; But now being the single independent bad bitch as Maddie would call her… she was clueless. The past ten days Lexi had been fantasizing about what she was going to do with Rue once she got out of rehab, of course asking her big sis for advice on the do’s and don’ts. This kind of gave Cassie a sense of how she had been all those years talking about all those useless boys who would never equate to anything: God was it exhausting. They’d run through hundreds of different scenarios of potential dates and none of it seemed to be good enough for Lexi

**LEXI:**

_Are you kidding me? Picnics are sooo cliché! Rue would hate it!_

Was her response when Cassie suggested a simple picnic at the park

**LEXI:**

_I don’t think Rue just wants to hang around our house Cass! She’d been over here more times than any of your boyfriends combined!_

Was a rather rude comment Lexi made when Cassie suggested that they just simply chill out at their house and watch Netflix. The girl was impossible to console so Cassie just gave up and decided to start looking at careers. It was a boring process but eventually Cassie would realize just what the fuck she wanted to do for the rest of her life.

**EXT-UNKNOWN BUILDING-NIGHT**

Maddy was currently in the process of leaving her 5th visit to Abuse victims Anonymous or AVA for short. She never thought that talking to a bunch of strangers about her relationship with Nate would ever help… but it did help…a lot. Maddy went from completely denying it to opening up and actually understanding that they were both really fucked up human beings. Nate’s psychopathic behavior was due to his “unusual” circumstances growing up with his father; and Maddy certainly didn’t help being the girl she was 3 months ago. They were both shitty people back then, Maddy wasn’t sure if she could ever fully recover from the trauma Nate put her through but she could sure as shit try. Nate’s trial was starting in a few days and that was stressing her the fuck out. Maddy couldn’t decide if it would be better for him to spend the rest of his life in jail or if he deserved a second chance. Nobody offered him a second chance, but did he deserve one? Maddy couldn’t help but feel guilty because the whole Tyler situation was because of her, if she hadn’t lied to Nate that night would any of this have happened? Would Rue have OD’d a second time if Jules hadn’t left due to the stress of being blackmailed by Nate? Maddy had to life with this, that she had almost ruined all those lives due to her own selfishness. The scary part was that she wasn’t sure if she could ever not be in love with Nate, in some fucked up way she still did even now, even talking about the abuse he put her through.

**GUY:**

_Hey, Maddy right?_

A random boy walks up to Maddy, slightly out of breath because he ran to catch up to her, this will be interesting.

**MADDY:**

_Can I help you? You do know walking up to a girl in the middle of the night gives off major stalker vibes right?_

That caught him off guard, the boy’s face flushes white.

**MADDY:**

_I’m joking dumbass! What do you want though because I’m kind of trying to leave_

**GUY:**

_Sorry… I didn’t mean to seem creepy… I just wanted to introduce myself, the name’s Darian I go the same group you do_

Ok maybe Maddy still is a bitch, this poor guy just wants to say hi.

**MADDY:**

_Oh my god that’s right! I’m sorry I made you all pale and stuff_

**DARIAN:**

_(laughs) it’s alright I get the whole paranoid thing especially with you dating.. Nate? Was his name?_

Maddy nods her head.

**DARIAN:**

_Ok well I’m gonna cut to the chase, maybe after next week’s meeting we can go for coffee or something? Get to know each other?_

He’s pretty straight-forward, ok she’ll bite.

**MADDY:**

_Sure, Next week, I like really have to go now though so until then!_

Maddy starts walking away before Darian can respond, the two walk away smiling, could he be the one?

**3 MONTHS LATER**

**EXT-HOTEL-NIGHT**

A car parks at the nearest spot of a random hotel in the middle of nowhere. Rue steps out of the front seat, in a panicked state. Her mind was numb, was she dreaming? All she knew was that she had to meet him at the hotel, he needed to know. She was walking up to the room now still in shock, she knocked on the door lightly, she hears muffled noises of someone getting out of bed. Nate opens the door, completely dumbfounded

**NATE:**

_Rue what the fuck are you doing here? its 2 AM in the morning_

Before he can inquire any further he notices the streaks of tears that Rue had clearly created before she got there. Her outfit was disheveled, she clearly got here in a hurry.

**RUE:**

_She’s… dead Nate, she’s fucking dead_

Before he can even ask who, Rue runs into his chest holding onto him tightly. The sobbing frame of the tiny girl was so fragile he was afraid to hold her, her sobbing continued, uncontrollable sadness had taken over her masked calmness. Nate was completely baffled, who the fuck could have died?


	10. The Mistake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rue is finally getting out of rehab after quite a while away, how will she acclimate to life? How has Nate's prison life been holding up?

**CHAPTER 10:**

**RUE(V.O):**

_So while I was somewhat enjoying myself for the 85 th day, still debating whether or not I was a threat to myself, Nate was having a very different experience._

**INT-PRISON-MORNING**

Today was day 85 of Nate’s lovely prison experience… he hated it. He knew he probably deserved it, out of all the jocks who did terrible things Nate wasn’t exactly the worst, he heard of plenty of football players getting locked up for things like rape and shit; To him however, he was a monster. It didn’t matter how much he thought he changed or how others saw him, at the end of the day he would be a terrible fucking person. His only hope of change was to take responsibility for his actions, which is what he did exactly 85 days, 12 hours and 34 minutes ago (yes he kept track) and accept the consequences. Sadly, these ‘consequences’ were taking extremely fucking long to go through because of his dad: Whose lawyers kept delaying the trial. Nate just wanted this to be over, but his father insisted he was innocent; Actually it was more like he was so ashamed by his own actions that he couldn’t admit that maybe he had a part in Nate’s fucked up actions. The look his father gave him after his meltdown showed it all, Nate wasn’t to be saved, he was to be dealt with. No matter how much his father apologized, no matter how much he wanted to not be him… Nate would forever be the boy who almost ruined several lives. He held himself in contempt for this, he would never allow himself to forget that what he did hurt so many people. Nate naively thought that he could change, he thought that if he did enough good it would completely outweigh the bad he did… it didn’t.

**RUE(V.O):  
** _Nate was noticeably more pessimistic during his stay in prison, I mean I don’t blame him. Being trapped in your thoughts for one day is bad enough but for several months? I’d rather be dead. I truly wanted Nate to get better, I realized that night when he showed up at my house that he cared for me; It was fucking weird because prior to that he was blackmailing Jules and insulting my I.Q. I never brought it up because if I did, he would’ve broke… further than ever before. Why did I know that? Because I’d been there, I cared for someone so deeply that I could barely contain myself, they didn’t ever seem to notice. The next week was the same stagnated existence as the last except this had a celebration in mind… I would be leaving rehab in 5 days. Could Rue handle it? I’m sure everybody asked, hell if I knew, all I knew was that I desperately needed a change of scenery, one can only stare at the same chipped drawing of a river so many times._

**INT-REHAB-MORNING**

Today marks day 90 of Rue’s wonderful stay in rehab, there wasn’t a thing in the world that could make her want to stay a second longer. Her mother was on her way to pick her up, hopefully Gia wasn’t, Rue didn’t want her to have to go through this a second time, no one should have to. Rue really hoped Lexi wasn’t coming because she looked like shit, having only gotten about an hours’ worth of sleep due to overthinking everything imaginable; They had made plans to go on their first official date tomorrow, that way Rue would have some time to readjust to normal life. Grabbing what little personal belongings Rue had, she thought only of the future: How was the denizens of East Highland going to react to Rue’s second resurrection (everybody said she died again), how was she going to graduate more importantly and most important of all: How the fuck was she going to date Lexi Howard?

**EXT-REHAB-MORNING**

Lexi was anxiously waiting outside the rehab doors hoping to see Rue, she couldn’t wait another day… it had already been 90! Lexi thought she would want to see her now anyways because this would be the first time they could physically interact since their… yea since that night. It’s funny, despite how passionate and somewhat cheesy their first kiss was, Lexi still found it too awkward to openly mention. Like both of them knew they were together, but this was different due to Rue’s place of residence the past 90 days. Their relationship was just beginning shit they hadn’t even had their first date yet, which reminds her: She finally knew what they were going to do! It was going to be a surprise so in order not to spoil it Lexi decided not to think about it, because with her luck she’d spit it out as soon as she saw Rue. It was exactly 10:01, Rue was supposed to get out at 10; Ok maybe Lexi’s over thinking this, it’s been only a single minute she’ll be out of here any—

**GIA:**

_Rue!_

Gia shouts her sisters name cheerfully, apparently nobody listened to Rue when she insisted that only her mom pick her up. Lexi damn near jumps out of her skin due to the sheer volume of Gia’s shouting. Rue looks visibly pissed, she was trying to hide it under a thinly veiled smile, but she didn’t want to see them, more like she didn’t want them to see HER like this. Lexi decided to wait back, give Rue some space, the last thing she wanted was to overwhelm the poor girl.

**RUE:**

_Aren’t you supposed to be at school?_

Gia rushes over to Rue and damn near tackles her to the ground in a hug. So much for giving Rue space…

**GIA:**

_Today’s Saturday stupid!_

**RUE:**

_Oh yea that’s right… well you didn’t have anywhere better to be?_

**GIA:**

_Where else could I be Rue? You’re all better now!_

That was possibly an overstatement, the truth was Rue was scared beyond belief. Sure she had the reassurance that she went in herself and actually paid attention to all the meetings; But it didn’t guarantee her sobriety. She was afraid that any little thing would send her right back to where she was, that could never happen again. Thank god she had Gia and Lexi and everybody else, if she were alone she’d probably be dead.

**RUE:**

_Yea well I might have a few cracked ribs, you been working out sis?_

That made the two laugh, it had been too long since the two saw each other. The truth was that this was the first time they’d seen each other in 3 months. Rue didn’t want Gia to see her in Rehab, it was already bad the first time but with Gia’s own dabbling into drugs, she couldn’t see Rue withdrawing from what felt like decades worth of shit put into her body. The first two weeks were miserable, her O’D felt like a fucking tutorial compared to what she endured, but Rue did it.

**GIA:**

_Here and there, Roy’s been taking me to the gym every once and a while._

**RUE:**

_Oh reaaally? He’s not pushing any more drugs on you is he?_

**GIA:**

_Nooooo Rue I could never, he’s actually quit all together, I think something happened to him during the Halloween Party, but he won’t tell me_

Lexi smirked at that, what happened to Roy that night would be a secret only her and Rue would know. They did what any drug PSA couldn’t do, they got him to stop doing drugs.

**RUE:**

_Well if you say soooo, I’ll be keeping an eye on him… Who’s this beautiful girl you’re hiding behind you? Is that Lexi? Couldn’t be_

Lexi damn near blushed, since when did Rue learn how to sweet talk? All of Lexi’s courage just drained seeing Rue in person. Despite her outward appearance, Rue was still has charming as the last time they had seen each other, the difference was that Lexi was sober now. Truth was that Lexi had taken a shot or two of whatever her mother drank before she went over to Rue’s that night “liquid courage” as it was called. It wasn’t enough to influence her decisions, but it sure made admitting her feelings that much easier. No amount of alcohol in the world could save Lexi Howard now, she had to commit to her feelings and make this relationship work; But first she needed to actually fucking move because she had to have been standing there for like 5 minutes and it has to be getting weird for the Bennett sisters.

**LEXI:**

_You must be seeing things Bennett; the only beautiful girl here is yourself… maybe if you showered now and then._

Rue cracked an actual smile at that one, Lexi’s snarkyness was one of her best qualities

**RUE:**

_Well in that case…_

Stepping closer to Lexi

**RUE:**

_Could you direct me to my stunning girlfriend Lexi Howard, because I only date the most beautiful… you know being beautiful myself and all_

Ok yea Lexi was definitely blushing now, she could feel every nerve in her cheeks light up with heat. She couldn’t process any words to spill out of her stupid mouth, so she was probably just standing there like some kind of idiot.

**LESLIE:**

_Alright girls that’s enough lovey dovey for this morning, Rue and Gia get in the car; Lexi I’m sure you’ll be seeing us later but right now I’ve got to get Rue situated so drive safe and see you later!_

Thank god for Mrs. Bennett, if Lexi were there for even a second later she would have melted. They all waved goodbye and drove off quickly leaving Lexi to herself, which wasn’t a bad thing. She needed time to unfuzz her mind and focus on the date they would have tomorrow.

**INT-PRISON-MORNING**

Today was day 90 of Nate’s adventure in self-hatred, in other words he was still in prison. Nothing had really changed in the past week: Nate woke up, ate whatever they threw at him for breakfast, went back to sleep, woke up again and exercised a bit… it was a pretty boring routine. He slept as much as he could because there wasn’t anything else to do other than think about how his life would go. It didn’t look bright to say the least, he couldn’t imagine that they would just let him go, he assaulted somebody, that at the very least they could charge him with. The only thing of any interest today was that his father would be meeting with him, probably to try and get him to plead not guilty… he wouldn’t. No matter what his father said, Nate would take the stand and plead guilty to all charges, he had to if he had any hope of a real life afterwards. The guards were taking him there now, Nate couldn’t wait to see the shock on his father’s face; Despite the change his father was trying to make, it would still be satisfying to see the man responsible for Nate’s fucked up childhood in despair. The lawyer would be there too, completely dejected to the fact he wouldn’t be getting a paycheck for defending Nate Jacobs. As he turned the corner, Nate was speechless, it wasn’t his father waiting for him like he thought, it was Maddy.

**INT-BENNET HOUSE-AFTERNOON**

Jumping into your own bed after 90 days of rehab had to have been the most therapeutic thing Rue has ever felt. Forget the group sessions and the various other activities, knowing that by the end of the program you can go back to your normal bed is the real end goal. The facility was obviously not funded as well as it was supposed to be so the bed she slept in was as good as a wooden plank with some feathers thrown on top. Sinking into that bed, Rue forgot about her problems, her anxieties; She almost forgot that she has almost 3 months of school to make up and the school year ends in 2. What she didn’t forget however was the two people she needed to see within the next 24 hours, the first was Nate Jacobs, she had to make sure he was ok. The guy was in prison, he couldn’t be ok, but she had to make sure he was at least alive. What Rue really needed to do was to truly forgive him, her acceptance of his actions 3 months ago was really just to prevent him from breaking down again; Because then she would have again, and she probably wouldn’t have gotten with Lexi and… yea. She had a lot of time to think and she genuinely forgives him now. The second person Rue had to see today was—

**LESLIE:**

_Rue! There’s someone outside who really wants to see you!_

Ok well the point has been made; Lexi Howard was going to come first. As Rue approached the door she had to remember, they were dating now, this wasn’t just them hanging out, this was two people in a relationship hanging out. God this was fucking complicated but what else was new? She opened the door to see the bright smile of detective Howard, this wasn’t even a metaphor she literally was dressed as a detective.

**LEXI:**

_So detective Bennett, ready to start the best day of your life?_

Rue could dig this, Howard threw Bennett’s outfit at her, she didn’t know how she got it, but she didn’t care. They were going on their first date, and damnit it was going to be the best day of their lives.

**3 MONTHS LATER**

**INT-MINI MART-NIGHT**

Fezco was preparing to close down his shop just as he always did when a seemingly random number calls him.

**FEZ:**

_Yo who is dis?_

Heavy breathing could be heard on the other end of the phone, somebody was freaking out

**DARIAN:**

_Ay Fez? It’s Dare, I really fucked up… like really REALLY fucked up dude I—_

**FEZ:**

_Shut yo ass up right now, I’m heading over there now so stay put_

He knew this dumbass kid would get into some kind of trouble, why couldn’t he have just fucking listened? He threw the keys towards Ash, hoping he could handle the closing, it was going to be a long fucking night.


	11. The Date

**EXT-STREETS-NIGHT**

It’s fucking cold in California; Fez didn’t know if this was due to an abnormal change in the weather or because of his fucking nerves but it was fucking cold. He sped down to the street Darian texted him, nervous of what he would find. That kid has only been working with him for 3 months and he’d already managed to fuck up, Fez didn’t know exactly what he did but Darian sounded really fucked up. Ash could handle closing up the shop, he knew that the kid could handle himself; It’s pretty sad that a 14 almost 15-year-old kid could be more trusted than this fuck up. Exiting his car Fez was filled with dread, the smoke was blocking almost all view of whatever the hell was happening, the air was filled with an almost electric energy, but he knew one thing… Darian had caused an accident. Darian’s car was smack dab in the middle of the other car, whoever was in there really couldn’t have survived. It was 2 am in the morning yet Fez was as awake as could be, probably because he knew he would be the one to handle this. Darian was huddled on the edge of the road still freaking out, it didn’t take a genius to see that Darian did this. Fez normally doesn’t lose his shit but tonight would be an exception.

**FEZ:**

_Yo what the fuck did you do?_

Darian must not have heard Fez drive over because the kid nearly jumped out of his skin.

**DARIAN:**

_Uh—umm I-I-I was just d-driving and… I hit them_

The kid had to have gone half fucking brain dead, this was really pissing Fez off.

**FEZ:**

_Who? Who did you hit Dare? Why the fuck did you call me and not the cops?_

That was the most important answer Fez needed, what made him so special that he overrode the fucking cops?

**DARIAN:**

_Because you know them, at least I’m pretty sure you do… I’ve seen them hang around your place a couple of times_

Somebody he knew? Darian was gonna fucking die if it really was somebody he knew.

**FEZ:**

_Then who the fuck was it?_

Darian was clearly in shock because he didn’t even hear Fez yelling at him, Fez runs past Darian and finds the other car; He looks inside, and he knows… somebody’s dead. Darian was right, he did know them, Fez felt like he was going to throw up.

**FEZ:**

_WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO DARIAN? YOU CAN’T TELL ME THIS WAS AN ACCIDENT!_

Darian still couldn’t hear him so Fez goes for his phone and calls the first person he can think of: Rue

**3 MONTHS EARLIER**

**INT-LEXI’S CAR-AFTERNOON**

**RUE (V.O):**

_Lexi really wasted no time in setting up this date of ours, I truly had no idea what she planned. All she said was to prepare to have the best day of my life and then I changed into my detective outfit. Sure it’s cheesy, sure we almost don’t fit into the outfits (I may or may not have put on a little weight… not too much), but we were happy and that’s all I needed. Truth be told I was fucking nervous, I know that I may come off as the confident one, but I’m really a nervous wreck when it comes to stuff like this. I didn’t really have to be that confident with Jules, I just kinda followed her lead; With Lexi I felt that I had to take charge in a way, like I would be the “man in the relationship”. Lesbian relationships are fucking weird ok? Why can’t we both just be really feminine and talk about makeup and shit?_

Lexi truly couldn’t wait to spend the whole day with Rue Bennett, she had to make sure today was amazing because well.. first dates are supposed to be right? Lexi has always kind of felt really critical of really minor things, she just overthinks every possible option; It’s a blessing and a curse. On one hand, if Lexi just takes this casually, Rue could either follow along and it would be a really chill day, or Rue would be bored out of her mind and this date would be ruined; On the other, If Lexi went really over the top, Rue could like it even more… or she could just be overwhelmed and overdose again and… yea Lexi’s mind worked wonders. Just knowing that her middle school crush was sitting with her today as her girlfriend was enough, would it be enough for Rue?

**INT-PRISON-AFTERNOON**

This was a surprise, instead of Nate’s father waiting for him, Maddy was… why the fuck was Maddy Perez, the girl he practically tormented, visiting Nate? A very confused Nate struggled to sit down in the small chairs, or rather he was too big for the normal sized chairs.

**NATE:**

_Maddy, what the hell are you doing here? Where’s my dad?_

Maddy expected that kind of response, why was she here of all places?

**MADDY:**

_He’s waiting outside, I asked him if I could come in first, to try and convince you not to throw your fucking life away!_

**RUE (V.O):**

_Ok I just realized that in order for this next bit to make any kind of sense, I’m gonna have to take you 3 months in the past. Nate and Maddy’s last night together_ **.** _You see the night that I collapsed, and everybody freaked out, Nate went to meet up with Maddy right afterwards; I assumed that it had to do with the fact that Nate had Maddy go to the police and report him for everything he did… I couldn’t have been further from the truth. Turns out… they had one last hook up, I guess you could call it a goodbye fuck, I don’t know. I’m not an expert in that kind of shit but I’d imagine this was meant to sever their relationship for good; Except for one small detail: Nate didn’t tell Maddy he was turning himself in, just like he didn’t tell any of us. So by the time she had gotten to the police station, to try and pin in on herself or anybody other than Nate… she was too late. He had already admitted to everything, Nate wanted to rot in jail. However there was one small detail, they didn’t exactly use protection…_

**NATE:**

_This has nothing to do with you Maddy, you know why I have to do this I---_

**MADDY:**

_Don’t give me that shit about how you need to repent for your actions, if you really were sorry you would fucking fight, you would make some kind of effort to live for us._

Nate’s heart sank, what the fuck does she mean by us? She couldn’t still think that they were together could she?

**NATE:**

_What the hell do you mean by “us”? Maddy we’re over with, you know that right? No happy ending in sight_

Maddy smirks the kind of look that always got under Nate’s skin

**EXT-MOVIE THEATER-AFTERNOON**

A movie theater huh? This was where Lexi wanted their first date to be; It was actually kind of cute, Rue had to give credit where credit was due.

**RUE:**

_So what’re we watching detective Howard?_

Lexi smiled

**LEXI:**

_Well detective Bennett, rumor has it that this movie theater is playing a marathon of all our favorite mystery movies when we were children, and I felt it was my duty to report it back to you_

This detective roleplay was cute when they were younger because, well, they were kids but now there was something else about it that Rue liked. It freaked her out thinking of Lexi like that but, they were together, so it was bound to happen eventually.

**RUE:**

_You did the right thing Howard, as your superior I feel it is necessary to accompany you in this grueling task, I believe we should get beverages and food so we can stay focused_

Apparently Od’ing twice lets you play a character really well, Rue’s “detective” vocabulary certainly evolved after spending another night unconscious.

**RUE (V.O):**

_Everybody should overdose at least once… it tends to open your mind, knowing that your own stupidity almost killed you; You tend to appreciate the little things in life having known that you would have never seen them again had you died. Experiencing something as simple as a movie marathon with Lexi seemed like the perfect day to me, I just wish I wasn’t so fucking terrified to have fun._

**INT-PRISON-AFTERNOON**

Maddy is fucking pregnant? What the fuck kind of reality is this that god thinks Nate could raise a fucking kid? Nate’s already fucked up, how the fuck would a Nate junior look? How could she be pregnant? They were safe, as safe as any teenager couple could be. That night was meant to be a send-off, a romantic gesture of “this is it”. Except now it’s not, not even close, if she’s telling the truth then Nate’s problems are only getting worse. Wait… is she telling the truth? This is Maddy we’re talking about, the same girl who told him she blacked out while she was fucking Tyler. Could she be lying to him? Could he take the chance of calling such a bluff? How would this work? He can’t be a father in prison, that would be even worse than not being there at all! Was this his father’s plan? To have Maddy convince Nate to plead not guilty? If Nate were to get out of prison, his father’s name would be cleared, and most likely Nate’s as well. Fuck… these were not the decisions any healthy teenager should be making, who knew that by 18 Nate would be facing jail time, debating whether or not to plead guilty.

**EXT-MOVIE THEATER-NIGHT**

It has been exactly 6 hours since the two girls started their marathon, having finally ended, the two head to Lexi’s car.

**LEXI:**

_Well Bennett—(laughing) I’m sorry Rue but I can’t keep up this detective spiel anymore. I think we just had the best first date ever._

Rue was glad Lexi thought the same, today, even though they just sat there and watched B-list movies, reminiscing about the past, Rue couldn’t have pictured a more perfect day. Today cemented the idea that Rue could be happy, despite the massive fucking anxiety that swelled up in her like a goddamn blimp. Rue could imagine herself doing this with Lexi for a very long time, her future seemed a little more certain.

**RUE:**

_Honestly, Lexi, you are the best date planner in the history of date planners, you could make a fucking career off of this._

Lexi’s blushing for like the 5th time today, god this was fucking embarrassing; Or was it cute to Rue? Either way Lexi hated how any form of compliment caused such a reaction. Today meant so much to Lexi, she finally could confirm to herself that they were an official couple, her anxiety could calm down just a little right? Probably not but the thought was still there that Rue liked Lexi enough to stick around.

**LEXI:**

_Well thank you very much, it took so much effort—_

Rue interrupts Lexi’s attempt at sarcasm with a well-aimed kiss, lighting Lexi up like a fucking glowstick

**RUE:**

_You’re cute when you try to be sarcastic Lex, but don’t think you can get away with being snarky babe_

Wow, it was weird to say that, Rue’s heart skipped a beat realizing what it was her mouth just spit out. Although Rue played the cool calm and collected chick for the most part, she was internally losing her shit. She didn’t know what was enough or what wasn’t, the whole event was stressful as hell yet also like the best thing ever.

**LEXI:**

_Well there’s more where that came from BABE, come on it’s getting late and we both know how your mother gets_

Was Lexi making fun of her or embracing the nickname? It had to be the latter because Lexi was smiling wider than ever before. Rue could get used to this, being sober and being in a relationship separately was certainly less complicated. Matter of fact, Rue hadn’t even considered taking drugs this entire day, she had found a healthy one, like ibuprofen or something, except her name was Lexi, and she wasn’t sure that she could ever have enough of her.

**INT-MADDY’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Maddy is watching a re-run of one of many soap operas she has had the pleasure of watching, coincidentally enough, the main character just found out she was pregnant. She really hoped that Nate would consider her offer, she knew that even though they couldn’t be together, he would want a child to raise. She was sure it would be enough to sway his mind, but she had to wait until next week to find out. Getting ready to go to bed, Maddy checks her phone to see a text message from Darian

**DARIAN (TEXT):**

_Hey, wyd?_

God he was such a boring texter, Maddy regretted even giving her number to him. She promised him that she would get lunch with him and it completely blowed; Turns out he used to be on the football team with Nate so all he did the entire time was ask about Nate… major turnoff. Maddy leaves him on read and goes to sleep, without any more thought about it.

**EXT-RUE’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

Rue steps out of Lexi’s car, kissing her good night.

**RUE:**

_See you tomorrow?_

Lexi smiles

**LEXI:**

_Of course Rue, any day of the week_

**RUE:**

_Well I don’t really have much else going on soooo you might get sick of me after awhile_

Lexi smiled even brighter

**LEXI:**

_I could never get tired of the girl I love; I’ll text you when I get home_

**RUE:**

_Alright drive safe… love huh? You love me?_

The realization of Lexi’s words smacks her in the face

**LEXI:**

_Uh-um---_

Lexi drives away with the reddest fucking face imaginable, that couldn’t have made Rue any happier. The two girls end the night both in love, Rue is finally happy after all this time.


	12. The Question

**RUE(V.O):**

_Remember when I said things would get worse?... Don’t say I didn’t give you a heads up_

**INT-RUE’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

Lexi driving off after admitting her love for Rue was probably the cutest fucking thing that would ever happen in Rue’s often cute-devoid life.

**RUE(V.O):**

_There were few things I considered cute in this world: baby animals were an obvious one, because the only people who didn’t were psychopaths like pre-realization Nate; for the most part I hate children, they were just irritating screaming all the time like we get it life sucks, wait until you realize the rest of your life will be even worse! I shouldn’t be talking like this, but you know it’s true, every day we wake up with one less day on this earth, it’s a sad reality but I try not to think about it. Other than baby animals I’d have to say that Lexi was the only other thing I considered cute; it sounds cheesy I know. She always had this attitude with me that was a mixture of terrified and infatuated with me, I was honestly the same way so I can’t even make fun of her. Honestly, I wished we stayed in this awkward phase, where we weren’t sure if something was too much or too little, times were simpler. This was when we were figuring things out, once we did figure it out… things got complicated._

**MONTAGE**

2 weeks later the girls meet for the 12th time, the only reason it wasn’t all 14 days was because Rue had to meet with Ali to make sure she wasn’t doing drugs, she wished she was right now. Rue loved Lexi with all her heart, truly, but spending 12 almost straight days with the same person tends to be a little crazy. Lexi wasn’t the clingy type, like she respected boundaries and all that typical shit, it was more like there was nothing going on in her life without Rue, like Rue made Lexi’s world. This would’ve been fine had Rue actually been a positive influence, but even with 3 and a half months clean under her belt, Rue was the last person you wanted to idolize.

**LEXI:**

_Hey babe, what’s on the menu today?_

That same cute tone of Lexi’s never failed to flutter the butterflies in Rue’s stomach, it was a shame that everything else just got to be boring. This wasn’t either girls faults, just what do you have to talk about after seeing one another more often than you do your own parents.

**RUE:**

_Pancakes?_

**RUE(V.O):**

_Hell, even pancakes were getting boring… like how does that even happen? We would always drive out to the same diner, order the same pancakes… it got to be exhausting_

Rue and Lexi enter the diner and sit down, Lexi’s bright and cheery appearance is contrasted by Rue’s dreary and dull attitude… she’s usually like that so Lexi can’t really differentiate the doom and gloom.

**LEXI:**

_What’s up Rue? You’re looking a bit gloomier than usual_

Shit, so clearly she can tell the difference

**RUE:**

_What do you mean? I’m never gloomy…_

That manages a strained smile from Lexi, but she’s not letting up

**LEXI:**

_No seriously, you can tell me anything Rue_

Rue’s going to have to come up with something because she’s not letting up

**RUE:**

_School has just been stressing me the fuck out, I’m three months behind and I suck at math_

Although not 100% a lie, it was a lie for this particular conversation

**LEXI:**

_Well, I can always tutor you, we spend enough time together as it is, might as well be productive with it_

Lexi was surprisingly smart, like in the way that she never really had to try, and she just passed her classes, as good of an idea as it might be, Rue seriously needed some alone time.

**RUE:**

_Maybe, I don’t want to put any more stress on you than I already have, this was my fault, I need to fix it without dragging others with me._

Lexi was still suspicious of this answer, but it was the only thing she was going to get. She smiles it away and takes a bite of pancake.

**LEXI:**

_I’m getting really tired of pancakes you know_

Rue finally smiles

**RUE:**

_FINALLY, I was hoping you’d say something_

The two girls laugh and walk out of the overused diner

**RUE(V.O):**

_If things remained like this, I could’ve lived, the problem with relationships is you tend to get closer to the person rather than farther away; This may just be me being me but I needed space, I got it eventually, just not the way I intended._

**INT-PRISON-DAY**

Somehow, today was the day Nate went to court, this was probably due to his father’s urgency to end this little game. It’s not like he enjoyed being in this fucked up cell, there was nothing worse than being trapped in a tiny room with only your thoughts to accompany you. The problem was that Nate also wanted to stay here, because he was a threat to everybody around him; The only thing that made him even question this was his child. God that felt fucking weird to say, Nate’s only 18 years old and here he is discussing his future kid, even this was his fucking fault. If he hadn’t gone to see Maddy that night, maybe he could sleep easier in jail, but knowing that she might be telling the truth about all this… it scared him. It scared him because if his kid was a boy, he might grow up to be another Nate, a jock terrorizing the student body, blackmailing anybody who got in his way. That could not fucking happen, the cycle had to end here with Nate, despite how unhappy his life might be. He had no choice but to plead not guilty, his father’s lawyer was prepared to end the case in less than a week, and Nate didn’t doubt that it would happen. He had to know if Maddy was lying, he had to know if he meant that much to either her or his father that they would lie to him so egregiously. The guards were coming to his cell now, today would spark the beginning of the rest of his life, he hoped that the three and a half months he spent here was enough rehabilitation; It had to be enough if he were to ever be normal.

**INT-MINI-MART-DAY**

Fezco was counting his money from the morning drop, being his own distributor sure had its perks. He didn’t have to suck up to anybody, he was his own boss, he also could do basically whatever the fuck he chose to do. If the heat was too much, Fez could lie low and wait out the cops, if he was still working under Mouse he’d be sweating bullets trying to sell even an ounce of weed right now. The cops were on especially high alert right now because it was the beginning of spring, where a lot of teenagers like to get shit faced by drugs they can’t even pronounce. This meant a lot of drug busts, which in turn would bump up the numbers that the police department expected to meet. It was a good thing Fez wasn’t an idiot, because if he was, he would’ve definitely been caught by now. Getting shot tends to wake people up and change them, it didn’t apply to Fez; however, People like him, people that are born into shit like this, rarely can get out of it. He was lucky that he was just shot, he was up and selling a month after it happened, Ash had taken most of the responsibilities while he was cursing out the couch’s stiffness. Fez’s main reason for doing what he does is so Ash can have some semblance of a future once he’s gone; Whatever future Fez wanted, he sure as hell wasn’t getting. He also didn’t want this kid to grow up a drug dealer, which is why in a year or two, he planned on getting Ash enough money that he wouldn’t have to help Fez anymore. He couldn’t turn him over to the system, that’s how people’s lives are ruined before they even start, he sadly had to stay with Fez as long as possible. Finishing counting, Fez has made $5642 for the day, he is going to take about half of that and store it away for Ash’s fund, and the rest will be used to maintain the store. He desperately needed a way to make more however, despite how stressful and risky it was to work for Mouse, Fez was making at least 8k every other day. Now it took everything to make even half of that, it would improve as the spring moved forward, he needed another hand, somebody who could do what Fez did.

**DARIAN:**

_Yo, you the owner of this shop?_

Shit, Fez getting all paternal-like always distracts him, who the fuck is this?

**FEZ:**

_Who’s asking?_

The kid is easily the same age as Nate, except he looks like he could be closer to Ash’s age, he had that kind of look that oozed fuck boy. He looked familiar though, probably went to East high, it was the only high school to be fair.

**DARIAN:**

_I don’t mean to intrude, but people tell me there’s an entrepreneur of sorts that owns this fine mini-mart, and by the looks of it, he needs a helping hand._

The kid was well-spoken, or he liked to act smarter than he actually was, the type that Fez normally stayed away from.

**FEZ:**

_And you thought, with this information… that this entrepreneur that may be under a lot of heat right now, would just take you in?_

He smirked, a smirk that looked scarily similar to that of Nate Jacobs, this kid was seriously something else.

**DARIAN:**

_Look, I came especially cause of the heat right now, let me talk numbers with you for 10 minutes and I guarantee you I can make you 20% more each week… minimum_

Fez did need the money, and if this kid screwed him over he could just kill him, either way the cops would be all over him so what did a homicide charge matter?

**FEZ:**

_You got 5 and you’re walking with me, gotta pick up a drop_

The kid extends his hand out for a shake

**DARIAN:**

_The name’s Darian, I look forward to doing business with you_

They hadn’t even agreed on anything and the kid was confident enough to declare them business partners, he had balls.

**FEZ:**

_Fezco, just call me Fez, start talking kid_

**INT-LEXI’S HOUSE-DAY**

The girls make their way to the couch yet again and watch reruns of shitty television. Neither of them enjoy it per say, but the two enjoy making fun of it together. Rue knew there was going to be an argument today, she could tell by the atmosphere that Lexi was not satisfied with the lies she was being fed; Rue didn’t blame her, she didn’t do anything wrong other than want affection. Rue is the opposite of affectionate however, very rarely has she actually initiated a kiss that meant something, shit she could count maybe twice? This may have been due to a lack of affection growing up (unlikely though because up until her dad died, everybody in the Bennett household was normally affectionate). It also could have been due to the two fucking overdoses Rue has experienced within the last year, that tends to permanently screw you up; She was looking for an excuse to not be cold, but it was really fucking difficult to keep up with Lexi when she looked like she’d never been sad a day in her life. Lexi had like the perfect life, well minus the fucked-up dad, but that was so long ago it couldn’t still affect her right? Ok the ignorance levels were off the fucking chart, but Rue honestly didn’t know, she couldn’t just ask. Rue needed time to be alone, to sort out her shit without feeling she had to pretend. This was a cruel thing to say but, Rue couldn’t act like everything was ok, because nothing was. Sure she was 3 months clean, but that was probably the only achievement she’s made, things are technically “official” with Lexi but that was years coming so it wasn’t much of a surprise for them to finally seal the deal; Rue had no clue what she was going to do outside of high school other than be around Lexi, which simply wasn’t healthy. The two spent way too much time together as it was, they needed space, and this was going to be addressed tonight hopefully if she could gather the fucking courage. It was scary, feeling like Rue was in the wrong here, even though it was perfectly normal to want space, she was afraid Lexi wouldn’t take it as just needing space. Rue didn’t really give Jules any space and she was afraid that may have caused what happened later on, that couldn’t happen with Lexi, she couldn’t lose her best friend.

**RUE:**

_Hey, can we pause the shitty TV and talk for a second_

Lexi was pressed into the right shoulder of Rue’s thin frame, so she just simply looked up into her eyes with that doe-like expression she was known for

**LEXI:**

_Yea of course Rue, what’s up?_

Actual concern was in Lexi’s face, so she was obviously bracing herself for the worst; Hopefully, she wasn’t thinking she was ready to break up with her or something

**RUE:**

_You need to promise you won’t get mad ok?_

Lexi just continued to look up at Rue, melting her heart as she spat out every sentence.

**LEXI:**

_You’re not cheating on me are you?_

Lexi’s sarcasm was one of her best if not most stressful traits, half of the time it took Rue way too long to realize she was just kidding.

**RUE:**

_What? No- I—oh goddamnit you’re joking, for real I need to ask you something_

Lexi lifted herself off of Rue and allotted herself some room on the opposite end of the couch, with just their legs touching.

**LEXI:**

_And for real I’m being serious too, cause if there’s another girl involved I want to know so you can introduce me_

Lexi’s face lit up with a wide smile, this was getting harder by the minute.

**RUE:**

_I need some space…_

She just stupidly blurts that out after Lexi was trying to be funny? What the fuck was wrong with Rue

**LEXI:**

_What do you mean space?_

Lexi was clearly holding back whatever flustered emotion behind a thinly veiled smile; Rue really was the bad guy here.

**RUE:**

_I just mean that maybe we can just spend a few days without seeing each other, like we can still text and stuff, but I just need some time to myself every once and a while_

Lexi let out a sigh of relief

**LEXI:**

_Shit you scared me for a second there, I thought you were breaking up with me, of course we can give each other space, to be honest this was getting a little dry anyways so it might not be the worst idea._

Gotta love the overthinking mess that is Rue, that went by a lot easier than expected.

**RUE:**

_Um- ok, sorry I was just expecting a more dramatic response…_

Lexi started to tear up for real this time

**LEXI:**

_What? Cause I’m just a hot mess who can’t control herself over her beautiful girlfriend?_

She started actually fucking crying, so of course Rue slid over to her side of the couch to hug her.

**RUE:**

_No no no, that’s not what I meant at all Lex, I just—_

Rue was cut off by the snickering of Lexi’s facade.

**LEXI:**

_I’m just kidding you idiot!_

Rue pushed herself off of Lexi as the smaller girl began to laugh hysterically.

**LEXI:**

_Oh my god you should see your face! You’re so cute Rue_

For the first time it was Rue blushing, Lexi caught her, she couldn’t help but join in the laughter though because it was pretty funny.

**RUE:**

_Oh shut up and come here_

Rue extended her arms signaling for Lexi to huddle close to her, so of course she listened and pressed herself back onto Rue’s shoulder. The two girls returned to their shitty TV and enjoyed the last night they would be together, for neither of them knew of what would happen after tonight.

**EXT-STREETS-NIGHT**

The kid had actually proven himself to be quite the asset to Fez, Darian clearly knew what he was doing. They were both walking back to the Mini mart so Fez could explain how the shop worked at night and such, business had to go on after all. They had agreed that Fez would handle the day shit, dealing and selling whatever he could, and Darian would handle the nighttime business. All that had to be done was to give him a key and trial run, that’s what tonight would be. They arrived at the front door and Fez handed Darian a spare key

**FEZ:**

_I’m handing this to you out of good faith kid, if you fuck up it will be your ass on the line not mine, got it?_

**DARIAN:**

_I won’t let you down boss, 15% like we agreed right?_

**FEZ:**

_If you can deliver what you say you can, then 15% is yours, I’ll check back with you in the morning ight?_

Darian nodded his head but stopped Fez

**DARIAN:**

_I got a question for you; do you know a girl by the name of Madison Perez?_

That caused Fez to turn his head in confusion, how did this kid know Maddy of all people?

**INT-PRISON-NIGHT**

By some grace of god (or his father’s meddling) Nate would be leaving his jail cell by the end of this week. Turns out, when your father is as powerful as he is, you can practically get away with anything because the case got thrown out today due to lack of evidence. Although Nate and Maddy fucking confessed, it was thrown out due to them being minors who may have been coerced to give a statement; Whatever the fuck that meant. This was a relief and a grievance at the same time because A: Nate could find Maddy and figure out if she really was pregnant and B: He wasn’t going to be rotting in jail like he hoped. No matter how much Nate wanted out he knew he didn’t deserve to be, he of all people should be in jail right? The thing that scared him however wasn’t the possible paternal role he would be taking, it was that there was somebody else he was thinking about, somebody he should never be thinking about. Her name was Rue Bennett, and Nate couldn’t get her out of his head, before anything else, before even Maddy, Nate had to see Rue, and that terrified him.


	13. The Diner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mistakes are made, can they be recovered from?

**EXT-PRISON-MORNING**

Readjusting to normal life was the second priority Nate had on his list, number one was finding Rue Bennett; He knew that she had to be the first person he saw, the first person he spoke to, before anything remotely normal could return to his life. It was unexplainable to anybody; he could never elaborate as to why the girl he tormented for the better half of a year would be the girl to set him right. The best way to describe it was that Rue had the most profound effect on Nate, a girl he pushed to the utter limit, being partially responsible for Jules leaving, which in turn caused… And yet that same night she managed to greet him with a weak smile. It was almost like this girl, who lived most her life under the haze of various drugs, could see more clearly than anybody he ever knew. She knew that despite his many, MANY flaws, Nate ultimately wanted to be a good person, he wanted to not be that angry jock that he lived up to be. He truly meant what he said to her that night, calling her beautiful wasn’t meant as a complete insult; Sure it was a dig at her, but she was truly beautiful to him. Nate had never seen someone walk with such confidence, not even Maddy who kept up the bad bitch persona could rival Rue’s genuine emotions. That night in general was one Nate would never forget, all the bad and all the good that came out of that, it could never be lost in the monotony that is high school. Today was the first day in 3 months where his head was clear, gone was the pounding of self-hatred and the veil of guilt that covered his eyes. Today he felt like a new person, somehow sitting in prison, where most devolve into their most animalistic selves, Nate changed for the better. He needed to see Rue, he needed to see Maddy, but before all else… he needed a proper shower because he smelt like shit.

**RUE (V.O):**

_The week or so between Nate’s imprisonment and his release was for the most part pretty boring. I caught up on the mountain of assignments that piled up due to my own confinement, Me and Lexi were giving each other space; Of course we still texted but we didn’t need to spend every breathing moment together. I think that we did that because we were in so much doubt over the possibilities of actually being together. You know, typical teenager shit where we doubt every move we make and think everything we say is stupid and… yeah, typical teenager shit. Maddy only got better, she told me the other day how she thought she had some kind of stalker, somebody she might have met at her meetings, but nothing panned out so we just assumed she might be stressed out because of her plus one currently residing in her womb; That was a surprise for sure, finding out there’s going to be a baby Jacobs running around with the attitude of Maddy, that’ll be a handful. I haven’t heard from Jules for a while but I’m sure she’s doing just fine, I actually don’t even think about her too much anymore, which is probably a good thing. It only took 3 months and a second overdose to free myself of Jules, not to say I hate her now or anything, I’m just not obsessed with her. I would compare Lexi to Jules every time we did anything and I would feel super guilty about it, I couldn’t help it, but I think I have finally progressed enough with Lexi that Jules is more like an ex than a possible recurring hookup. I wish that things could have been different but if they didn’t happen the way they did I wouldn’t be with Lexi… so if you can’t find true love, just overdose a couple of times, tends to do the trick. I wish I knew how things would end up with Lexi ahead of time, so I could prepare myself for any arguments, but then again… where would be the fun in that?_

**INT-RUE’S HOUSE-MORNING**

Life was pretty good today, Rue hoped it could stay like this. It was yet another day, drug free, stress free (almost), free of anything that could hinder the wonderful progress that has been made by one Rue Bennett. Rue woke up at a reasonable time, 10 AM on a summer day wasn’t that bad, could have been better but staying up until 3 am texting Lexi warranted a later morning. Rue’s been rather productive since she left rehab, who knew that actually paying attention to those classes benefited you. She shot Lexi a quick lovey dovey text, the typical text you send your partner, gets up and into the shower… yes Rue showers on a regular basis now. It only took her a breakup, an OD and all the extra teenage angst to finally correct her hygiene, there’s a metaphor somewhere in that; Then again Rue’s entire life could be summed up by some pretentious college student looking to score an A on their Psychology paper. If all else failed, Rue could probably submit her life story to like a research group or something, there was bound to be some form of education to be gained from her drugged-up life. Who knows, she could even get into writing and publish a book “Rue: How drugs ruined a young girl’s dreams”. There was plenty she could do in the world of self-pity, make others feel bad for her and all that; But where’s the fun in that? Just to grow old knowing the world pities you, not admires. The house was empty for the majority of the day, her mom was at work and Gia with Roy… or Troy? She never bothered to learn which was which. Lexi snapped her back with a cute selfie, she could almost see the lacey bra strap Lexi totally wasn’t trying to hide; Fuck, why was Rue so horny? Ever since she left rehab she’s been this sexual… freak. She couldn’t not like it, but it made shit awkward, like a basic conversation would devolve to a full blown make out session in her head, except for that one time they actually made out, which was fucking hot, but it disgusted Rue at the same time. Like in Rue’s mind, Lexi was this perfect little angel, who couldn’t possibly do the dirty shit that normal teenagers do, except she clearly wanted to do; The signals weren’t hard to pick up on, like the selfie or the way she’d look her up and down sometimes… Lexi was DTF, but was Rue? Of course, but with Lexi? She had no idea, she didn’t want to ruin that perfect little image of Lexi but at the same time, she wanted to ruin her… ok these hormones are taking things a little far. Rue tried her best at sending Lexi her own “fake nude/sexy photo/ what ever the fuck the teenagers called them”, she was able to show a little bit of collar bone… very scandalous. With that uncomfortable experience out of the way, Rue was ready to begin her day, she was going to take her drivers test today, and the tester person will be picking her up at 12, she couldn’t wait. Stepping out of her den, Rue reached for the pot of coffee before a knock on the door startled her. It was only 10:30, the driver couldn’t just show up 90 minutes early right? Walking over to the door, she reaches for the handle and opens the door expecting a sweaty older guy, except that’s Nate Jacobs, why is Nate Jacobs at Rue’s front door? Before she can question him, Nate lunges towards her into a kiss, forceful yet respectful. She thought she was going to force him off, and slap him across the face; Shamefully however, she met his passion, almost falling into him. This lasted for about 5 seconds until the two realized just what the fuck they were doing.

**RUE:**

_What the fuck are you doing?_

He almost looks ashamed, but also proud of himself, he’s been planning this out for a while.

**NATE:**

_I guess we should talk now_

Rue gave him one of those “you think?!” looks and gestured for him to come inside, slamming the door behind him.

**INT-LEXI’S HOUSE-MORNING**

Rue really sucks at sexy photos, she couldn’t be blamed though, the poor girl was clueless. Not to say Lexi was the expert on the matter, she wasn’t slutty like her sister could be, ok that was harsh, wasn’t wrong, however. She had seen enough of her sister’s late-night photo sessions to know what your partner wanted to see, she just had to tone it down a little bit because Cassie was taking full on nudes. It was 10:30 in the morning and here Lexi was taking sexy photos for her girlfriend on a Sunday, the things we do for love. She didn’t have too much to do today, for once she didn’t have to go to a diner or to the movies with Rue, this whole space thing was working wonders for the both of them. She just planned on texting Rue later, to see how her driver’s test went, Lexi was sure she would pass, Rue almost hit her once but that’s part of the learning experience. She was thinking of calling Rue soon actually, she hadn’t heard her voice in a few days and was starting to miss it, yes this was cheesy as hell. Of course before she could pick up the phone there was a sudden knocking on the door, so of course she had to run over and find out just who the hell was knocking on the door of the Howard residence. To her utter surprise, it was Maddy who was making all the noise; Of all the people Lexi thought of that could be knocking on her door, Maddy was the least likely.

**LEXI:**

_Umm, hey Maddy, what’s up?_

**MADDY:**

_I need you to come with me to the doctors_

Lexi stared at her confused

**MADDY:**

_Please… I don’t want to go alone_

Was this a vulnerable side of Maddy she was seeing? She didn’t know there was a vulnerable side to Maddy

**LEXI:**

_Ok… let me get my phone in case anyone calls, you can come inside if you want_

Maddy awkwardly stepped into the house and started fidgeting with the little dolls placed around the table; She didn’t really know what else to do.

**INT-RUE’S HOUSE-MORNING**

Who knew at 10:54 in the morning Rue would be debating her sexuality, something she finally thought she squared away. Turns out, she’s at the very least bisexual, being that she just returned a kiss to the very handsome Nate Jacobs; She never realized just how good he looked somehow, probably something to do with the fact that he used to terrorize her. The bigger problem than Rue’s choice of partner was the fact that she was with Lexi! So why the fuck did she just do that?

**RUE (V.O):**

_Did I just cheat on Lexi? Kissing another person is totally cheating right?_

The two were awkwardly pacing between steps, waiting for the other to finally start the conversation

**RUE:**

_When did you get released?_

**NATE:**

_This morning, I had to see you—_

**RUE:**

_Why did come here right after getting released from prison?_

**NATE:**

_Um, well I needed to see you Rue, I think my actions have made that clear_

He could not have been clearer

**RUE:**

_Yea I get that but… Maddy did tell you I’m with Lexi right?_

Why was Rue talking so comfortably with him after having just kissed him not even 5 minutes ago?

**NATE:**

_Yea she did actually, after telling me I was going to have kid, fun topics to talk about between 2-inch-thick panels of glass. How are things with Lexi?_

Well if this isn’t the weirdest fucking conversation Rue has ever had

**RUE:**

_Things are fine between me and Lexi, well I thought so until you fucking kissed me_

Nate flashed his signature smile

**NATE:**

_Still the charmer huh? That wasn’t what I meant when I did that_

**RUE:**

_Then what the fuck was the reason? You don’t just kiss a girl that’s in a happy relationship for no reason Nate_

**NATE:**

_I guess… I guess I like you Rue Bennett, I’ve been thinking about what I was going to say to you for the last 3 months and that was the best thing I could come up with, I know it was shitty and straight forward and I have no chance with you but… I wanted to at least know what it was like to kiss you_

**RUE:**

_Well, you are obviously an attractive guy Nate, one of the few who don’t absolutely repulse me, but yea I’m with Lexi, maybe if you had said something before, things might be different but they’re not. I can’t jeopardize this happiness I’ve created for myself, I can’t. And you do realize that just randomly walking up to a girl’s house and kissing her is like really fucking creepy right?_

Nate almost choked on the muffin he stole from her cupboard

**NATE:**

_You’re right, I should have thought a bit more about that, do you have anything planned today? I really need somebody other than my parents to talk about everything_

Rue couldn’t help but laugh at her situation, here she was, consoling the newly reformed Nate Jacobs, she never thought this would be where her life would take her.

**RUE:**

_Well I have to take my driver’s test at 12, but after that I guess we could go get something to eat and talk, think you can give me a couple of hours?_

Just getting some semblance of a yes from her was good enough for Nate

**NATE:**

_Yea, I’ll meet you at that diner next to the school, just text me when you’re on the way_

They both uncomfortably shuffle in opposite directions, Rue to her bedroom and Nate to the front door; No words could explain how bizarre this experience was. The part that made Rue the most uncomfortable was how she reacted towards Nate. She was hoping she would slap him, yell at him about how much of a creep he was; She didn’t though, she lectured him, described it as “jeopardizing”. That was not the phrasing somebody used when they didn’t want somebody, that was the phrasing of somebody who wanted somebody but knew they couldn’t. She just cheated on Lexi, pure fucking Lexi, the best fucking thing that happened to Rue, Lexi… how could she? This was definitely nothing Lexi did, right? She was being the perfect girlfriend to her, so why the fuck did Rue have to go and do that? She couldn’t have been that horny that she would just make out with anybody right? This was something to do with Nate, was Rue really attracted to Nate? She couldn’t pursue him for a variety of ethical reasons, she needed to figure this out, and she would over lunch, right after she passed her driver’s test.

**INT-MADDY’S CAR-EVENING**

Lexi did not plan on spending her day today with Maddy of all people, but it’s not like anything else was going on so what the fuck.

**LEXI:**

_So where are we going Maddy?_

That was a good question, Maddy was in such a rush she forget to tell her

**MADDY:**

_Planned Parenthood…_

That would make sense

**LEXI:**

_I almost forgot! Wait, you’re having an abortion?_

Maddy rolled her eyes

**MADDY:**

_They don’t just kill babies Lex, I want to see how far along I am, maybe get an ultrasound, I just didn’t want to be alone for this._

**LEXI:**

_Why me though? Why not like Kat or Cassie, you’re closer with them then you are me_

Maddy almost looked ashamed

**MADDY:**

_Because you’re the only one who hasn’t told me to kill my child, everyone wants me to get rid of this like it never happened; But I can’t help but feel that this kid will be good, I can raise it to be good._

That was surprisingly deep for Maddy, It was a sad truth but it was the truth, Cassie and Kat both opposed this pregnancy, Cassie stood up all night telling Lexi how it was such a terrible idea and that it was good she was gay because she didn’t know what she would do if Lexi was pregnant; It was a lot for Lexi to hear, she could only imagine what it was like to live it.

**LEXI:**

_I would never Maddy, this is your pregnancy, you decide what you want to do with it, who knows maybe me and Rue could be the gay godparents!_

The two couldn’t help but laugh at that, the tension that had built up had practically evaporated, they had arrived at the building and the two got out.

**INT-MINI-MART-EVENING**

Darian turned out to be a great investment, the kid in a week turned out more cash than Fez could in a month; He didn’t know how he did it, but Darian did it good. The only red alarm that was going off for him was being asked about Maddy, this guy seemed to almost be obsessed with her, asking Fez about personal shit. The really weird part was that he couldn’t tell if he was obsessed with Maddy or Nate, he seemed to idolize the guy. Whatever his major malfunction was, it made Fez uneasy, he brushed off most of the questions with a “I don’t know”, but Darian didn’t seem satisfied with that. Fez was going to look into him, find out just why he cared so much about the Winter Formal king and queen.

**EXT-DINER-EVENING**

**RUE (V.O):**

_I am officially a legal driver, after having stressed out for the past week and a half about this test, I passed without any real issues. The instructor was some creepy old guy so all I had to do was flash my smile a few times and any mistakes were forgiven. Now the real test for today was waiting for me right inside…_

Nate was awkwardly fiddling with a fork on the table of a not so well-kept diner; The outside made it look at least somewhat inhabitable but going inside, it came into picture just why she never went here, except for that one time with Ali. Walking inside, Rue felt giddy because he was clearly waiting for her, but ashamed because she was just so giddy.

**RUE (V.O):**

_I don’t understand what it is about Nate that is just so tantalizing… tantalizing? What the fuck am I saying? The guy’s hot ok? But that shouldn’t matter to me because I’m with Lexi right? Once you’re in a caring relationship you’re not supposed to be all hot and heavy for anybody else, I thought that was how it worked?_

The moment Rue puts her hand on the door and pushes her way inside he practically jumps up for her to notice him, clearly he’s been waiting for a while. He waves in her direction like she can’t see his giant figure and she follows up with a greeting smile.

**NATE:**

_Hey_

**RUE:**

_Hey_

Nate’s eyes trace left and right, like he’s thinking of the right thing to say. He gives up for a second and motions for her to sit down. She obliges, folding herself into her usual lawn chair self.

**NATE:**

_Isn’t that uncomfortable?_

She’s been sitting like this since she was a kid, and this is the first time anybody has ever questioned her.

**RUE:**

_No, what is this not normal?_

Nate chokes a little bit

**NATE:**

_No I’m not saying that but, you look like a folded beach chair or something_

Rue flashes him a teasingly offended look, was she fucking flirting with him? This wasn’t her in control, this was somebody else

**NATE:**

_Anyways… did you pass your driver’s test?_

Small talk was the only way he could get through this conversation

**RUE:**

_Flying colors! I had this creepy old guy who kept checking me out and…_

The conversation about a creepy test instructor carries on for a bit.

**INT-CLINIC-EVENING**

Maddy checked herself in and sat down next to Lexi, her knees were shaking so violently the whole row of seats started to tremble.

**LEXI:**

_Hey, you’re ok Maddy, you’re gonna be fine_

She takes a hold of Maddy’s hand and the shaking stops, Lexi was surprisingly good at playing therapist

**MADDY:**

_Thanks, I’m just scared to know the gender, I’m afraid that if it’s a boy it’ll be like a baby Nate, but at the same time, if it’s a girl she’ll wind up like me_

Lexi looks at her quizzically

**LEXI:**

_Ok, a baby Nate I can understand being a lot but, why would a baby Maddy be bad?_

Lexi’s look was genuine, somehow with doing just the bare minimum, she helped Maddy out more than Cassie or Kat ever could

**LEXI:**

_You know, I used to idolize you_

Maddy looks at her confused

**MADDY:**

_No, what about Cassie?_

Lexi laughs

**LEXI:**

_What about her? I love my sister but her choices over the years are nothing to aspire to, you were always the bad bitch, the one who knew what she wanted and took it. I mean you survived Nate’s psycho phase, if that isn’t strong than I don’t know what is_

That was really touching coming from a girl Maddy barely knew

**MADDY:**

_I had no choice but to survive what I did, I’m just glad he’s better now, or at least he seems to be. I still don’t know if I’m going to let him—_

The nurse interrupts Maddy, calling for Ms. Perez. Maddy takes ahold of Lexi’s hand, implying she wants her to come with her. Nothing says bonding like looking at someone’s unborn child.

**INT-CLINIC ROOM-EVENING**

After another 30 minutes or so of waiting, the doctor finally comes in and begins the ultrasound. Maddy is nervous, but not as much because of Lexi’s kind words. She was like the gay Dr. Phil; she was Ellen essentially.

**DOCTOR:**

_So by the looks of things, you are 4 months along, and it’s a boy!_

Maddy took a sharp breath but Lexi was there to calm her down

**DOCTOR:**

_Have you decided on a name yet?_

She was thinking of something cute like Rose or Gemma if it was a girl, clearly it wasn’t going to be a girl now. There was one male name that came to mind however, one that would be quite fitting.

**MADDY:**

_Tyler, Tyler will be my kids name_

Now it was Lexi’s turn to take a louder breath, she knew exactly why she gave that name. The doctor left and let Maddy and Lexi have some privacy.

**LEXI:**

_Tyler huh? Any connection to—_

**MADDY:**

_Yes, that’s why he’ll be named Tyler, because of the boy’s life I fucked up, hopefully I can give a more positive influence on the name_

The sentiment surely was there, Lexi was just getting uncomfortable of being in this place.

**LEXI:**

_Can we get out of here? The last time I was in a clinic, I nearly threw up_

**MADDY:**

_Why?_

**LEXI:**

_Because Cassie got an abortion like a week before the Winter Formal, that’s why she was acting so differently, it was McKay’s, and he didn’t want it_

Maddy never knew, but she wasn’t surprised at the same time.

**MADDY:**

_You want something to eat? I heard that diner right next to the school has some pretty good food_

Lexi checked her watch, 1 PM, Rue must’ve gotten done with her driver’s test by now, she was going to call her when she got home. She nodded her head to the proposition of cheap diner food, it was time she started socializing with other people; Maddy actually seemed like a pretty decent person, she wasn’t lying about the idolizing.

**INT-DINER-EVENING**

Rue checks her watch, 1 PM, her sister was going to be coming home soon and her mother shortly after. She didn’t want to stay much longer but her body wasn’t cooperating; No matter how much she tried to deny it, Rue was attracted to Nate.

**NATE:**

_You like the food?_

Rue puts on her best attempt at a fake smile

**RUE:**

_Yeah I love it_

He knows she’s lying

**NATE:**

_It’s pretty bad I know, I think my burger had a few hairs on it, that’s not why I wanted you here though_

**RUE:**

_Then why did you want me here Nathaniel?_

Calling him by his full name huh? She was really flirting with Nate Jacobs

**NATE:**

_I just need you to know that I will always be here for you, and that I hope you can at least be my friend Rue, I need a friend right now_

He looked genuinely alone; the former popular jock of East Highland was reduced to nothing after just 3 months. Rue couldn’t help but feel bad for him, she knew the feeling all too well

**RUE:**

_Of course Nate, anything you need just let me know, you’ll be happy to know that Maddy plans on keeping your kid by the way_

He looked so happy after that, like all the life suddenly returned to his body, and with that, he also got hotter, At least to Rue that is. Before she could do anything to stop herself, she decides to take the initiative this time and kiss him. Like before he gets caught off guard but quickly adjusts to this newfound pleasure.

**RUE (V.O):**

_I did warn you that shit was going to get worse right? Well this is just the start of my shit decisions_

Unbeknownst to either of them, two more customers just entered the diner: Maddy and Lexi. As soon as they end their shameful indulgence, Rue catches a glimpse of Lexi in her peripheral and turns around quickly.

**LEXI:**

_Rue?_

The most hurt look you could ever imagine was vacating the usual bright and cheery face of Lexi Howard. She looked utterly devastated, with so little context as to why she was being hurt. Rue couldn’t even speak, she just stared, ashamed of her actions.


	14. The Accident Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is short i know! but i needed to get some answers out now so the next chapter can be even longer and devastating!

**RUE (V.O):**

_You ever do something so irreversibly fucking stupid? Something so horrendous that you know there’s no coming back from it? I wish I didn’t know about this kind of fuck-up, I’ve fucked up plenty of times in my life; The two OD’s will attest to that, but this was worse. Overdosing had the possibility of death, If I died, I didn’t have to care about anything. Sure, my family and maybe like one or two friends would’ve been devastated, but they would eventually learn to move on, despite the ever-present reminder that I did too many drugs and my brain short-circuited. Me kissing Nate, was worse than Overdosing, it was worse because Lexi walked in on that, with absolutely zero context. Not that context would have made this ANY better, but she had no idea why I did what I did. For all she knew, I fucked him before then… She could’ve pictured a thousand different realities where I was a complete piece of shit, and she would have been correct. Despite it JUST being a kiss, it wasn’t JUST a kiss, this was her girlfriend, kissing the one guy she should never be around, not because of his psychopathic past, but because she knew that he was practically in love with me. Of course I didn’t know that she knew, but she knew that he would do something like this, she was just too late to stop it._

**INT-DINER-EVENING**

Time was frozen, whatever grasp of affection Rue received from that desperate plea for Nate’s attention, it faded almost as soon as it came to light. All the oxygen in the room had been snuffed from Rue’s lungs, she could practically hear her own heartbeat… it was like the fucking roadrunner’s. That look… that fucking look she gave her, it said it all, Rue had utterly and entirely broken the best chance at happiness she ever could’ve asked for. The saddest part was, she wished she fucked him, at least then she would’ve had some kind of pleasure, so she would at least know why she was doing this; She couldn’t even explain why she did that, it just happened. One second she’s listening to Nate’s heartfelt conversation about needing a friend, the next she’s locked lips with him; Clearly her body wanted more because she damn near made a scene in front of the diner. It’s not like she needed to make a scene, because Maddy already was, Rue couldn’t hear what was being said because she was too focused on Lexi. She just stood there, with that broken fucking look, like Rue had ripped out her heart and stomped on in until it ceased to exist. It seemed like time stopped for Lexi too because she suddenly came to her senses and ran out of the diner, towards her car. Rue took this opportunity to chase her down, of course her being as unathletic as they go, Rue failed to stop Lexi from getting in her car and driving off. This was Rue’s lowest point, not her relapsing and all that shit, this is utterly and entirely because of her. She didn’t have a dead father influencing her choices when it came to this, she made this decision, and it may have just killed any chance either of them had at happiness. Rue did what any stereotypical protagonist did, she rushed towards her bike, believing she was faster than a fucking car, and chases after the one love she couldn’t lose. While Rue chased after Lexi, Maddy proceeded to yell at Nate

**MADDY:**

_Of all the people you could have done that to, you fucking choose Rue?! The one girl who in all of this shit, managed to keep a steady relationship. OF ALL PEOPLE YOU DECIDE TO NOT ONLY HURT ME BUT HURT LEXI? THE GIRL WHO HAS DONE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG, THE GIRL WHO HELPED ME FIGURE OUT JUST WHO THE FUCK OUR CHILD WILL BE WHEN THEY ENTER THIS WORLD._

Nate had never been so ashamed, he wished he could take it all back, that he could lock himself back in prison and rot like he planned. He wished that he didn’t go to Rue’s house today and lead her on, and fucking kiss her? What was he thinking, he knew she was with Lexi, she was actually happy! Which was more than anyone else could say. He chose Rue of all people to pursue, and he may have just ruined two people’s lives today with just a simple fucking kiss.

**NATE:**

_I fucked up, Me AND her are to blame, I should not have ever gone near her, I know that, I thought that if I did what I did, that I could bury this. That I could put all this shit behind me and focus on raising our child, or at least get a job and support you._

Maddy snickered at that comment

**MADDY:**

_You think I will ever let you near this child? After everything you did to me and now to Rue? Let you turn this kid into another you. No, you will stay the fuck away from all of us, forget we ever existed, Tyler will grow up thinking you’re dead because you might as well be._

With that the sharpest silence amassed, not a single soul dared to breathe out of fear they would be stricken dead on the spot. Finally, the vow is broken with Maddy storming outside, the ring of the bell echoing throughout the usually lively atmosphere. Everybody, still afraid to break this mute tone, slowly reacclimate to normal life and act as if nothing happened. Tyler huh? That was the name Maddy was going with, he understood why she went with that name. She really had a way with words “you might as well be dead” that statement resonated in his skull. Maybe she was right, maybe he should just disappear, never to be seen again. It would certainly make everybody’s lives easier if he just vanished, without Nate Jacobs, maybe Rue could talk Lexi into giving her a second chance, maybe Maddy could live a relatively peaceful life as a new mother; Maybe, with there being no Nate Jacobs, the world would be a better place.

**RUE (V.O):**

_I tried to warn you, I tried to veer you off this painful path you’ve decided to follow. I wasn’t telling you this out of selfishness, I just didn’t want anybody else to get hurt. I wish more than anything that I could turn back time, I would have rather died, I wished I was, nobody would have to remember the shitty memory of Rue Bennett: The girl who fucks up everything she touches._

**EXT-LEXI’S HOUSE-EVENING**

The near breathless Rue rushed over to the front door of the Howard Residence. Banging on it, she hoped, she prayed that Lexi would open it. That she didn’t do what she just did, that Lexi would forget, and they could live happily ever after.

**RUE:**

_Lexi! I know you’re in there, please open the fucking door!_

Silence, this somehow was worse than Lexi actually screaming back at her.

**RUE:**

_I know I shouldn’t have done that! Please! At least look me in the eyes! Tell me this is over; you know neither of us can handle this break up. Please… let’s just forget it ever happened, I’ll never go near him again, I’ll forget he ever fucking existed. I can—_

She’s cut off by the ghostly appearance of Lexi, what was once a bright and cheery girl, somebody who could brighten the fucking sun if she wanted to, was now reduced to a husk. All light in her eyes was gone, whatever makeup she had done in the morning was gone, she had cried so much her cheeks were almost raw with pain.

**LEXI:**

_Do you love me?_

Rue was so close to tears, but she didn’t deserve to cry, she could never experience the pain she was currently inflicting.

**RUE:**

_Of course! More than I love myself Lex! I would—_

**LEXI:**

_Then leave me the fuck alone, we can talk later, but because I don’t know if I’m going to hurt somebody right now, please just leave me be._

Lexi had never looked so sure in her entire life, not even when they got together did Lexi look as sure as she did now. Rue couldn’t say anything to that? What the fuck could she say?

**RUE:**

_I love you, no matter what happens, just know that_

Ok that wasn’t too bad… oh fuck Lexi was crying again.

**  
LEXI:**

_LEAVE!_

Her voice nearly gave out with the amount of anger exiting her body, Rue walked away, shattered. What could either of them do? No matter how much Rue apologized, it didn’t matter what she did, what she did was wrong, short and simple. Rue knew that Nate had feelings for her, it was obvious when she spoke to him the night before his arrest, and yet she still played with fire and threw gasoline at somebody she should’ve been giving the cold shoulder. What makes this situation even worse is that Rue just let it happen, she didn’t have to return that first kiss to him, she didn’t have to let him in her house, she didn’t have to go to the diner with him; Except she did, and she’ll spend the rest of her life regretting it. She’ll regret it because she may very well have thrown away her best chance at happiness with Lexi, she hoped that Lexi would find some way to forgive her and they could move on from this shitshow, but it was unlikely. What was likely to happen was Lexi would never speak to Rue again and move on entirely, she’d find some nicer, better girl and live a happy life. Lexi was the one with a far more likely future, Rue still had no idea what she was going to do so she just kind of hovered over whatever plans Lexi made. She hoped Lexi would give her another chance, she needed her to give her another chance, because she was starting to think about drugs again; Even the tiniest thought about that poison terrified Rue, she couldn’t risk it.

**1 WEEK LATER**

**INT-RUE’S HOUSE-MORNING**

**RUE (V.O):**

_So good news, I didn’t relapse! Despite all the fuckups I have made recently, I managed to stay clean; If I could pull one positive from this it would be that. Lexi has still not texted me or called me or given me any hint that she’s even fucking alive. She hasn’t been going to school, or she’s been avoiding me like the plague, I’m assuming she’s avoiding me because she’s not one to skip school. Nobody’s heard or seen from Nate since the diner… I guess I’m glad he’s just kind of disappeared. Maddy has ghosted me I think? She’s definitely avoiding me too but that’s probably to do with Lexi more so than it does Nate. And me? I’ve been watching shitty re-runs of love island, yes the same love island that got me through Jules. Is it healthy to repeat this process? No, but is it healthy to do anything I’ve done recently? No_

Rue wakes up from another long night of self-loathing, self-hatred, basically every kind of negative reflection. Her usually long nights have only become longer with the guilt that rests on her shoulders. Every day she checks her phone, hoping this will be the day that Lexi is ready to talk, it’s been a full week, and nothing has come up. Rue doesn’t want to give up on her, she doesn’t want Lexi to give up either, but she wouldn’t blame her if she did. Getting up from her bed, she questions the point, there’s nothing to do today, it’s Saturday, why is she forcing herself off her bed into a quiet house. Nobody is home because everybody else has a life, Rue’s life is on hold, until either she dies or Lexi forgives her, Rue is lifeless. There’s nothing for her to do today, except answer the fucking door, because yet again somebody is knocking on it… Wait! Is this Lexi? Is she coming to see her? Forgive her maybe? Rue looks like shit right now but it doesn’t matter, Lexi’s waiting for her! Rue rushes over and opens the door for a second time, again however she is met with an unexpected guest.

**MADDY:**

_You’re coming with me right now_

Rue couldn’t even object as Maddy was currently pulling her out of her house and into her car. Whenever any semblance of an idea is formed by Rue, it is instantly shot down by whatever higher power just to fuck with her.


	15. The Accident Part 2

**INT-MINI MART-MORNING**

A week and a 3 days of searching has landed Fez absolutely fuck all about why Darian is so fucking weird. The kid has only gotten worse too, coming in late at night talking to him like he’s some therapist who gives a shit. Turns out, Maddy ghosted him after promising him a date, he says promising when in reality knowing Maddy she probably said yes but really meant no. So rather than taking that no like a normal person, He started following her fucking everywhere, Fez now knows more about Maddy then he ever needed to. This isn’t even the tip of the iceberg though, because he’s been really vague about “getting back at her”, Fez has dealt with a few homicidal maniacs, shit he was shot by one, but this kid… this kid ain’t right. He doesn’t think that he has it in him to actually harm the girl, but at the same time, Fez has been watching him like a goddamn hawk, he hasn’t told any of the girls yet about him because he doesn’t want them to worry. From what he’s heard, Rue has her own list of shit to deal with, Lexi too; Apparently Maddy’s pregnant with Nate’s kid… he really is a playboy.

**INT-MADDY’S CAR-MORNING**

Apparently Rue can never get a normal weekend morning, because twice now she’s been invited to go somewhere with a person she never would have expected; Except with Maddy here, she’s been kidnapped, Nate… among his many flaws, at least gave her a choice.

**MADDY:**

_So why haven’t you talked to Lexi yet?_

That was a bold question

**RUE:**

_She told me to leave her alone and she would call me when she was ready_

Maddy glared at her

**MADDY:**

_And you listened to her?_

This was getting confusing

**RUE:**

_Yeah? Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do when somebody tells you to fuck off?_

Another glare

**MADDY:**

_No dumbass you’re supposed to fight for her, bother her until she gives in; We both know that Lexi is the best girl you’ll ever know, so are you just going to sit back and let her fade away?_

**RUE:**

_No…_

Maddy didn’t believe her

**MADDY:**

_I don’t believe you_

Rue was getting uncomfortable

**RUE:**

_I won’t let Lexi fucking forget about me and move on; I’ll do whatever I can to remind her that I’m still here ok?_

Maddy finally dropped the bitch act and smiled for once

**MADDY:**

_I already know stupid, Time for you to tell Lexi that_

**RUE:**

_What? Is that where you’re bringing me? Oh my god are you driving us to her house right fucking now?_

**MADDY:**

_Duhh, where else?_

Rue looked at her ragged clothes and panicked

**RUE:**

_You do realize that I literally just woke up and look like shit right?_

Maddy scanned her up and down and realized the same thing

**MADDY:**

_Shit you’re right you look homeless girl_

Maddy quickly turned the car around and sped back towards Rue’s house, this was the beginning of a very chaotic day

**INT-MOTEL-MORNING**

Nate woke up in a haze, his motel room was littered with beer bottles and naked women strung across his chest. He doesn’t really remember what happened last night but he can only assume judging by the crowd in his room. He’s doing what Maddy suggested, Nate Jacobs is no more, he’s somebody else now, somebody who doesn’t care about who he fucks, what he does, he just acts. For now on he will only act, not think; Clearly him thinking always results in somebody getting seriously fucked over. He manages to push past the several bodies lain out across the bed and the floor? Jesus just how many fucking people where there? His standards have even dropped, He no longer cared what they looked like, if they had body hair or not… it didn’t fucking matter, Nate Jacobs cared, this new person didn’t. Due to his height and size, getting off of the bed almost flung the girls currently passed out so they woke up, still groggy from the activities of day’s past. He ushers them all out, counting 4 different women all in this one small, damp motel room, normally he’d judge such behaviors, however he doesn’t fucking care anymore. He stumbles towards the bathroom and turns the shitty shower on, the water’s barely past room temperature but it’s not like it matters, nothing matters after all. Looking into the misty mirror, He looks himself in the eyes and almost… almost sheds a tear, he knows he’s going down a path he’ll never be able to recover from. It’s too late for this man to change himself, he thought prison would be his savior, apparently getting out of prison was the worst mistake he could’ve ever made.

**EXT-LEXI’S HOUSE-MORNING**

Rue managed to quickly change into something clean and somewhat presentable for Lexi, she had to look at least not homeless, her standards past that weren’t an issue. She couldn’t say she wasn’t nervous, of course she was fucking nervous she hadn’t spoken to the girl in a week, not to mention her doing what she did was not making this any easier. She was hoping that nobody else was home because if Cassie was there, she’d probably kill her herself. Of course she couldn’t blame her, Cassie always was the protective older sister. Steeling herself for a tough confrontation, Rue took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

**CASSIE:**

_Hell—ooohh it’s you, what are you doing here Rue?_

Of fucking course Cassie had to be there

**RUE:**

_Is Lexi home Cassie? I need to talk to her_

Cassie did look like she was going to kill her, or at least yell at her but a faint voice from upstairs called out

**LEXI:**

_It’s ok Cassie, let her in_

Without speaking another word Cassie steps to the side allowing Rue to shamefully walk up the usually cheery household. Lexi’s waiting for her upstairs, as beautiful as ever, she’s clearly still not over everything though because even though she’s trying to keep up the tough exterior, it’s clear she wants to cry again. Both girls stand there for a bit, no idea what to say to each other, Rue decides to start the conversation

**RUE:**

_So how are you?_

**LEXI:**

_Oh I could be better, my girlfriend kissed a dude last week, don’t know how I feel about it_

**RUE:**

_Sounds like a real bitch_

Lexi weakly laughed

**LEXI:**

_Yea, you could say that again_

**RUE:**

_I know you were supposed to call me when you were ready but… I couldn’t let you forget me; I couldn’t let myself just let you go, I fucking love you Lexi_

Lexi looked at her blankly

**LEXI:**

_You’re too late… I’ve found somebody else_

**RUE:**

_What? Who?_

Lexi tried to keep her composure but couldn’t keep in the laughter anymore, the blank look was replaced by that bright and cheery smile she’s known for

**LEXI:**

_I’m fucking with you dumbass, and I know I said that, which is why I asked Maddy to drive you here today_

Shit she really had her there for a second

**RUE:**

_Don’t lie to me like that!_

Rue softly punched Lexi’s shoulder

**RUE:**

_You really thought everything through? I didn’t think Maddy was like your henchwoman nowadays_

**LEXI:**

_Yup! I’m the Mastermind!_

Rue looked at her confusingly, clearly Lexi was making a reference that she didn’t understand

**LEXI:**

_Sorry, this past week I binged this hacker show and the guy became the mastermind or he always was the mastermind? I don’t know… there’s this guy that Christian Slater plays that actually reminds me a lot of you_

Rue vaguely remembered an actor by the name of Slater but a hacker show? What kind of shit was Lexi watching while Rue was watching a shitty love show

**RUE:**

_So I remind you of a middle-aged man?_

Lexi laughed for real this time

**LEXI:**

_Kindaaa, in the good way though_

Rue was glad they were back to small talk, she started to finally unwind and chill out

**RUE:**

_Well I’m happy for you… look like I was saying I can’t just let you go Lexi; I’ll do whatever I need to do, I’m never going near him again_

Time for the serious part of the conversation

**LEXI:**

_I don’t NEED anything from you Rue, I want you to stay with me, to love me, nobody else… no more kissing people!... other than me anyways_

**RUE:**

_Deal! I will never kiss another soul in my life, not even my mom or Gia, these lips will be for you and you only_

Lexi blushed at that declaration

**LEXI:**

_I just need to know one thing… why Nate? Why of all people did it have to be him?_

That was a great question

**RUE:**

_I guess… I guess that I just needed to get that shit out somehow, I’ll admit I’ve always kind of thought he was hot in the way that “he’s so hot but he’s also so shitty” but when he came to my house that night, when everybody did. I just fell for him, not as hard as I fell for you, but the feelings were still there; I managed to get rid of them while he was in prison because well, he was out of sight. But then he came back, and I was really hormonal at the time and I hadn’t physically seen you in a while so I guess it just all kind of came out at once._

**LEXI:**

_Well that was better than just saying you were horny I’ll give you that, he’s not thaaat hot though_

Rue gasped

**RUE:**

_He totally is! You’re telling me you wouldn’t?_

Lexi smirked at her

**LEXI:**

_Maybe we both can some day_

Lexi gave her the most mischievous look yet

**RUE:**

_What? I meannn_

**LEXI:**

_I’m just kidding! I’m not into guys like that silly_

It was Rue’s time to blush, things were turning around; She thought she had lost Lexi for good; she was really glad she didn’t. The two girls sat down on the bed and just embraced each other’s presence. No words needed to be said to express the love these two had for each other, all was well between the detectives.

**2 WEEKS LATER**

**RUE (V.O):**

_That dream will forever live on in my head as the ideal way I wanted things to go… it didn’t though. Truth is it’s been 3 weeks and I still haven’t heard a thing from Lexi, I’ve been too depressed to even think of fighting for her at this point so I’m just kind of existing right now. What? You thought shit went by that easily? I told you since the very beginning I was a pretty shitty narrator; this is the first time I’ve directly lied but still… Let’s picture that as the good ending, when you do everything wrong but the story still gives you a happy reward. Time to come back to reality, where things aren’t as bright and cheery._

**INT-RUE’S HOUSE-NIGHT**

Rue is restless ,it’s 3 AM and she’s still not asleep, this is odd because sleep is usually never this hard to get. But then again, being depressed and angsty and upset, your mind tends to race quite a lot.

**RUE (V.O):**

_For some stupid fucking reason I was struggling to sleep, I’m convinced that on top of all the other mental illness’ that I have, insomnia is another fine addition. I can’t even explain to you what was racing through my head that night, it was like 30 different thoughts all came and went within a seconds notice. The only thing of value that could’ve been occupying my brainwaves was that tomorrow… or later that day… you get the point, would be mine and Lexi’s 6 th month anniversary. I count the 3 months I was in rehab because 6 sounds better than 3. We still hadn’t spoken to one another but the last 3 months, minus my obvious fuck up, were filled with some of the happiest moments I had experienced in forever. I thought back to those times, when things were a tad simpler, sure there was relationship drama but not fucking cheating relationship drama. Of course those happy memories were then accompanied with the shitty ones, what I had done 3 weeks prior. In those 3 weeks I had accomplished exactly nothing, I went to school, paid attention to absolutely nothing, still dwelling on my fuck up and went home… where I dwelled some more. The only one who doesn’t absolutely hate my guts is Maddy, and that’s only because she wrongfully blames Nate more than she blames me. She has been keeping me updated thankfully, apparently Lexi was out of school for a week, stuck in her bed like I’ve been the past 3. After the first week, Lexi finally got out of bed and started functioning again like a normal human being, saddest part is apparently she’s doing really well right now. Well, not sad for her, sad for me because here I am still sulking in my misery, the misery that I caused. _

After about another uncomfortable hour of tossing and turning, Rue’s body finally gives in and passes out, just so she can have a measly 5 hours of sleep. All this restlessness has finally made Rue realize, she needs to fucking try, she at least owes Lexi that. Tomorrow, she was going to see Lexi, she was going to apologize, she was going to at least try.

**INT-MOTEL-NIGHT**

Nate too was restless, but for a completely different reason. He was planning something, something he was going to do to himself that would end his and everybody else’s misery; It doesn’t need to be explicitly said in his mind for him to know what he has to do. He knew how he was going to do it, that bathtub was small but it was going to have to work. He wasn’t even necessarily scared to commit; it was planning out his last day that was causing such unrest. He wanted to get up early and see his parents, maybe say some cheesy shit about how they did a good job and they did everything they could have. He wanted to then see Maddy, wish her well in the land of parenthood, even though biologically he was the father of that kid, he could never raise it. She was right, it was probably better off that the kid thought he was dead… might as well make it a reality. He wasn’t going to see Rue, as much as he wanted to, he knew that would only make things worse for her and Lexi. He hoped that they made up by now, it was about time that somebody got some form of happiness from this whole ordeal. It was settled, tomorrow was the last day Nate Jacobs was going to be on this earth, he was going to make it one hell of a last day. All he needed to do was get a good night’s sleep and move on… from everything. As soon as he shuts his eyes, almost at peace with himself, a soft yet forceful knock rattles his serenity. Who the fuck could be knocking on his door at 2:30 in the morning? The knocking continued so whoever it was, wasn’t going to leave without him answering. He stumbles out of bed and to his complete surprise, Rue was waiting for him, in tears practically fucking shaking. It was clear that she came here in a hurry because she looked like she just got out of bed herself.

**NATE:**

_Rue what the fuck are you doing here? its 2 AM in the morning_

She looked up at him with the saddest eyes he had ever seen.

**RUE:**

_She’s… dead Nate, she’s fucking dead_

Dead? Who the fuck is dead? How does one react to that? Before he could even respond she pressed herself into his chest, looking for any form of embrace. He gave what little comfort he could and finally mustered up the courage

**NATE:**

_Who’s dead? Rue look at me… who the fuck is dead?_

Rue was in complete shock, her vocal cords fucking froze up, it was like the grim reaper himself was strangling her

**RUE:**

_L--- Le---_

No…

**NATE:**

_Lexi? Is Lexi dead? What happened?_

She couldn’t spit anything else out but she could nod her head yes, Lexi was dead; But how? How could Lexi fucking Howard be dead when he saw her not even 24 hours ago. She buried her face in Nate’s chest and sobbed so hard he was afraid she was going to hurt herself. He couldn’t do anything else but just hold her and try to wrap his head around things.

**24 HOURS EARLIER**

**INT-RUE’S HOUSE-AFTERNOON**

Rue woke up at 12 pm in the afternoon, she couldn’t help it, she hadn’t gotten to sleep until 4 am and she had to get some level of healthy sleep. Today was the day she set things right, today was the day Rue was going to find Lexi and apologize, she didn’t care if she didn’t want to hear it, she was going to make her listen, she needed to fight; Like dream Maddy said, she needed to fight for those she loved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the next chapter is the last of this little series, maybe there will be an epilogue of sorts...


	16. The Accident Part 3

**INT-SCHOOL-AFTERNOON**

School was almost done for the day and that meant one thing for Lexi, she could go home and eat away her troubles with a tub of Ben and Jerry’s, watching shitty reruns on tv with her sister. It has been 3 weeks since she has last seen or spoken to her girlfriend, at this point I guess you could consider them taking a break. The sad reality was, Lexi didn’t know how to talk to Rue now, she knew about Jules obviously, she saw her fall head over heels in love with Jules; And yet that doesn’t bother her as much as when she saw Rue kissing Nate. She couldn’t explain it, something about Nate just made her feel… undeserving of Rue, it wasn’t his fault, the guy had obviously improved since… everything. Lexi knew from the get-go that Rue was at the very least bi but she was with a girl, she was with Lexi; Shouldn’t that have been enough? What did Lexi do wrong? Did she do anything wrong? That was the biggest question rocking her mind right now, did she not love her enough? Was she not confident enough? Nate practically defined the word I mean look at him. She couldn’t help but feel that somehow this was her fault, that she let her guard down and now’s she’s lost; Her sister keeps saying it isn’t her fault but how it could not be? Rue has always been an emotional wreck. She was pissed for blaming herself for Rue’s mistake, she wanted to pretend that it didn’t happen, but it did; They were going to have to talk about it eventually, she hoped that she would have the time today. Right after school she was going to spend the day with Maddy, surprisingly she’s been the biggest help with everything. Maddy explained it to her as this: Rue loves Lexi, that can’t be disputed, the problem is that Nate is still in the picture and you can’t really deny your bodies urges. It’s fucked up, admitting something like that, but it’s a cheaters logic, she hoped this would be the only time because she wasn’t sure if she could forgive anything more than what she saw. Maddy wanted to help her pick out a new wardrobe, something that might spark a new flame in hers and Rue’s relationship. Nothing slutty, just a new look for the girl was all she needed.

**MADDY:**

_You wanna just skip 7 th period and go now Lex?_

Lexi’s deep thought was interrupted by Maddy, she forgot she was in school due to all the time she spent in her head.

**LEXI:**

_Screw it, why not_

The girls gladfully ditched their 7th period biology class, in hopes that they could reinvent Lexi.

**RUE (V.O):**

_The funny thing is Lexi wasn’t the one who needed to reinvent herself that day, she spent all her time on her last day trying to impress me; It only breaks my heart further to know that she thought she was in the wrong._

**INT-CLASSROOM-AFTERNOON**

Rue decided to stop by her last hour just to get some form of good attendance, it didn’t matter that she missed every other class; Just one would be good enough for her, she wasn’t paying much attention anyways. Her mind lingered on Lexi, how she was going to approach her, what she was going to say. She was afraid that she would only make things worse, she was afraid that Lexi wouldn’t want to fix things, like she said earlier: everything seemed to be better off without Rue’s involvement. The self-loathing was getting repetitive at this point, but if she really thought about it, there was not a single thing or person in Rue’s life that has not gone to shit with her getting involved. Her mother can barely sleep some nights, out of fear that Rue would relapse again; It’s been six months since the Formal, but that didn’t mean shit. Gia almost got into the same mess Rue was in, it took her scaring Roy/Troy straight to finally keep her clean… she hoped. Lexi was the purest thing Rue had in her life, and yet she had turned her into something dark and hopeless, the last time they saw each other: Lexi screaming at Rue, was the worst experience she had ever had. All of these people, this was all her fault, she wanted so desperately to wish it all away and act like it never happened, but it did. She was supposed to be paying attention to class but how could she? Her world was ending and she wasn’t even 18. She wanted to see Lexi, but did Lexi want to see her? Would she scream again? Cry? Rue couldn’t handle it if she made her cry again. Before her mind could dwell to anything more depressing, an announcement on the intercom called for her dismissal, this was particularly strange because she just walked to school and her mother was at work. She walked because she felt like she needed some fresh air, plus it was one class so what did it matter if she missed a few more minutes. She gets up and heads out of the classroom, every student watching her as if she was going to explode. Stumbling down the hallway, her mind spiraled, all that talk about fucking things up brought one big Uh-oh to mind: Drugs. It didn’t matter that she was 6 months clean, at any moment just the mere mention could tempt her, and tempted she certainly was. She finally made it to the end of the abnormally long fucking hallway and into the dismissal office only to see the last person she expected: Ali.

**ALI:**

_What’s up kid? Let’s go get us some pancakes_

These fucking pancakes were getting sickening

**RUE:**

_Um, alright_

She followed him outside of the school, all the way to his truck before questioning any further

**RUE:**

_How did you get me out of school? How did you even know I was in school?_

Ali looked at her like she was crazy

**ALI:**

_It’s Monday… why wouldn’t you be in school?_

Ok that was true

**ALI:**

_I can pick you up because your mother had me put down as an emergency contact so you don’t do some stupid shit, and today I had the feeling you were going to do some STUPID shit_

The fuck? Was he omnipotent suddenly?

**RUE:**

_You make a fair point, I was going to do some stupid shit, if I’m going to be entirely honest, I was thinking about drugs again_

Ali chuckled

**ALI:**

_Of course you were, hop in, let’s go for a drive… I know you’re probably tired of pancakes by now_

This may have very well been the man to save Rue today, she didn’t know what she would’ve done if he hadn’t shown up.

**INT-RESTAURANT-AFTERNOON**

The girls had just finished shopping for Lexi’s new wardrobe, it was a complete success. She felt that this was exactly what she needed, to waste money on clothes she may or may not even wear, but just knowing she’d have a full closet gave her some level of comfort. Maddy was starting to have baby cravings so of course they stopped by the nearest food joint, it wasn’t necessarily good but it did the job.

**MADDY:**

_So how much longer do you plan on avoiding Rue?_

That was an eye-opening question, she managed to avoid it until now

**LEXI:**

_I really don’t know, is it bad that I’m scared to talk to her now?_

**MADDY:**

_Not at all, what she did was fucked up, why do you think I’m avoiding Nate?_

Well

**LEXI:**

_Because he physically and mentally abused you? Because before his epiphany, Nate was a pretty shitty person and now you’re afraid to get to close to him out of fear you might bring out that side of him_

Ok wow

**MADDY:**

_Ok wow you really are a therapist… I was going to say because he’s the reason we’re all in this mess, why your girl was doing what she did_

**LEXI:**

_Yea but if we’re going by that logic, he’s also kind of the reason we’re together_

**MADDY:**

_What do you mean?_

**LEXI:**

_He blackmailed Jules, which caused her to freak out and ditch Rue at the formal, which caused her to overdose again and end up in the hospital; From there we went through all that drama shit and finally admitted our feelings for one another… so yea_

Maddy was shocked by how in-depth Lexi was

**MADDY:**

_Ok that’s surprisingly true but—_

**LEXI:**

_He’s also the reason you’re pregnant right now, which in turn has caused us to become better friends, sitting here talking about our relationship problems_

Ok Jesus

**MADDY:**

_Ok fine! I get it he’s good and bad, it doesn’t excuse the bad though_

**LEXI:**

_Yeah, but at the same time I can’t just use him as an excuse for Rue’s behavior, she kissed him, I fucking saw it…_

**MADDY:**

_And you’re going to need to decide whether or not you can forgive her for that. I’ve made my decision but have you?_

It was a tall request to make but Lexi knew she had to forgive Rue; she was so glad it wasn’t anything worse than a kiss… a kiss she could forgive.

**LEXI:**

_Yea… yea I can forgive her, I’m gonna talk to her tonight, think we can kill a couple of hours somehow?_

Maddy simply smiled

**MADDY:**

_OF COURSE WE CAN_

She was loud enough that the other restaurant goers heard her, Maddy was used to the attention. They exit the building and Maddy accidentally bumps into a guy.

**MADDY:**

_Oh my bad_

The guy turns around, looking at her strange

**DARIAN:**

_Oh it’s perfectly fine… say, don’t I know you from somewhere?_

Maddy looked at him confusingly

**MADDY:**

_Hmmmm… I don’t think so, I gotta go though so bye!_

The two girls couldn’t see his reaction, but Darian was fucking furious.

**EXT-BEACH-EVENING**

Of all places, Ali decided to drive them to a beach; Rue couldn’t really complain, it was nice, it was quiet

**ALI:**

_So tell me about the girl…_

Ok, Ali was like her own personal god at this point

**RUE:**

_Lexi… I fucked up this time, not her_

He chuckled

**ALI:**

_What? Did you cheat on her or something?_

He looked at her jokingly but quickly readjusted when he realized that was exactly what happened

**ALI:**

_Shit kid you get around_

Rue punches his shoulder, hard… he deserved that one

**RUE:**

_It was an accident, kind of_

**ALI:**

_How the hell do you accidentally cheat on someone?_

Excellent question

**RUE:**

_I was going through a lot of shit at the moment, and an old friend of mine showed up and… it was a shit show and I totally regret it_

Nate was a friend now huh?

**ALI:**

_Well I really don’t need to know the details, what I do need to know is what you plan on doing tonight, because I swear if I see you doing some stupid shit like you were talking about earlier—_

**RUE:**

_I’m not going to relapse, as much as I would love to, I need one positive out of all of this, and staying sober right now is all I got_

**ALI:**

_Look, I’m not the best when it comes to relationship advice, but I do know that if you’re meant to be, you’re meant to be, it’s that simple. So get your ass over there tonight and apologize, beg if you need to; If she accepts and takes you back, she’ll be yours forever. But at the same time, if you fuck up like that again, she will NEVER be able to trust you again, you might as well be doing drugs again_

There’s Ali’s harshly true words for you

**RUE:**

_You make it sound like it’s so easy_

**ALI:**

_Because it is that easy, just talk it out with her, here let me drive you back to your house so you can prepare yourself_

Before she could even object, he got back into his truck and turned it on; Turns out tonight was really going to be the night she spoke to Lexi, she just hoped she wasn’t too late.

**INT-MADDY’S CAR-NIGHT**

The past couple of hours were a complete blur, to be completely honest neither of them even knew what they did, but it was fun. They were currently driving back towards Lexi’s house, unbeknownst to her, Rue had texted Maddy asking her to bring her home so she could talk to Lexi finally. Maddy wanted nothing more so she happily obliged.

**MADDY:**

_I’m glad I could cheer you up today Lexi, you helped me too_

**LEXI:**

_Well now I’ve got a great fashion sense so thank you! It’s a shame the night has to end so quickly_

It really was a great day, Maddy didn’t want it to end either but she was starting to get tired, probably because she was currently carrying a second human being in her womb.

**MADDY:**

_I’m just glad that we figured out this Rue shit, I don’t think I could handle you two broken up_

Lexi just smiled, it felt nice to know that everybody was rooting for them

**LEXI:**

_Well it’s not set in stone yet, but let’s be hopeful hm?_

Maddy smiled too

**MADDY:**

_Well we’re almost at your house so I guess I should tell you—_

Everything goes black

**10 MINUTES LATER**

**EXT-STREETS-NIGHT**

Fez goes for his phone and calls the first person he can think of: Rue

**FEZ:**

_YO RUE, I NEED YOU TO GET THE FUCK OVER HERE RIGHT NOW_

**RUE:**

_Why? What happened Fez? Where the fuck are you?_

Fez quickly looked around for a street sign

**FEZ:**

_I don’t even fucking know, it’s right by Lexi’s place though… I think she’s dying Rue_

What? How could Lexi be fucking dying?

**RUE:**

_WHAT? What the fuck do you mean? What’s going on Fez_

He couldn’t even process this fully, he was looking at a bloodied Maddy and Lexi, the problem was that the passenger side was the side Darian clearly collided with

**FEZ:**

_I got a call from some kid who works for me, talking about how he just hit some car in the middle of the night; I drove over as fast as I could and… It’s Maddy and Lexi, they’re both fucking bleeding bad but I don’t know if Lexi’s gonna make it Rue, she’s messed up real bad_

Rue’s world just fucking froze

**RUE:**

_Did you call an ambulance Fez? Please tell me you called a fucking ambulance!_

He knew that if he did that, Darian would snap, he didn’t care though, he hung up on Rue and quickly called 911.

**DARIAN:**

_Yo what are you doing? You can’t call the cops on me! I know your whole operation!_

Fez stared at him with a vicious bloodlust

**FEZ:**

_And you may have just killed two of my good friends!_

Fez lunges at Darian and starts to beat the shit out of him.

**INT-RUE’S CAR-NIGHT**

Rue could barely see between the tears in her eyes, they just wouldn’t fucking stop. How could this happen to her? She was just going to apologize and fix everything, her one chance at happiness might be dead. She was driving way past the legal speed limit but it didn’t matter, she did have to stop at this stop sign though. She quickly looked around for some kind of landmark, something that could tell her just where the fuck she was. She looked to her left only to see a motel, just a normal motel that… that Nate was living in. Everything from here on out seemed to be out of her control, suddenly she was turning left and parking in a motel spot, sobbing.

**INT-MOTEL-NIGHT**

**NATE:**

_What happened?_

Rue couldn’t fucking speak, she was inconsolable, how could she speak when the love of her life is fucking dead. She was even more aghast with the fact that she was here, and not at the fucking scene of the accident. What drove her to be here of all fucking places? Was she really going to do this again? Could she? When she looked up she saw Nate’s dreamy eyes, comforting her, she couldn’t tell him Maddy might be hurt too, not yet. Again it was like somebody else took over because before she knew it, they were locking lips. Nate couldn’t help but return the compassion, he wanted this more than anything, they didn’t have to speak, both of their brains shut off and embraced. This was going to be messy, disturbing even, but neither of them could stop themselves. Before Rue knew it, Nate was on top of her, taking her hoodie off.

**RUE (V.O):**

_You can guess the rest of what we did… You’re all caught up now, Lexi is dead and I fucked Nate Jacobs.. you happy? Is this what you wanted to know? How terrible I am? My girlfriend just dies and I move onto another. I can’t tell you anything more this is it, this is present day Rue: A complete fuck up who ruins everything she goes near, just now with a dead girlfriend_

**INT-HOSPITAL-NIGHT**

A girl wakes up from a terrible accident, riddled in pain; No amount of pain killers could dull this level of hurt. All she heard was the distant voices of doctors and her heart monitor, which was surprisingly stable. Her memory was fuzzy, she was just talking to Maddy and suddenly everything went black. Lexi survived the accident, but did Maddy?

**LEXI:**

_Hello?_

She manages to spit out weakly, Lexi was alone in her hospital room, she was hoping that her mother and sister knew at least. Rue had to have been coming right? She should’ve been in this room right? Rue had to have been coming. Lexi was scared, she didn’t know what happened, all she knew was that she never got to forgive Rue; The problem was, she couldn’t remember why she needed to forgive her… In fact, she couldn’t remember much at all.

**TO BE CONTINUED…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end for now... there will be a continuation later but for now... To be continued...


	17. A Good Guy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one night that Rue and Nate will regret for the rest of their lives...

**INT-MOTEL-NIGHT**

**RUE**

Tonight was going to be a mistake, probably the biggest mistake either of these two would ever make. It was bad enough that Rue was here instead of the hospital, even if Lexi was really fucking dead she should’ve been there, she should’ve seen her in her last moments; Except she isn’t, she’s with Nate Jacobs in a dingy motel room. Rather than providing comfort for her dying girlfriend, Rue was doing to absolute worst thing possible, she was getting ready to fuck Nate Jacobs. Deep down she always bounced around the possibility of doing this, even before getting with Lexi there was always something so primal about her feelings for Nate; It was as if it transcended basic emotion, there was something genetically bred into Rue to be a fuck up. Her genes were certainly not failing her now, she was already on top of him, taking of her much too large hoodie; The same hoodie her father wore before he died, the same hoodie she wore almost every day. She was disgracing her father’s memory even thinking about him at this moment, her last memory of him was that hoodie, and she just threw it on the floor like a fucking rag. She hasn’t even told him about Maddy yet, about how she was in the accident too; He didn’t ask, it’s not like he was focused on much else but Rue right now. His behavior was, unexpected, she pictured him in this moment as a domineering man, throwing her on the bed and taking what he wanted. The reality was this was the exact opposite, he hadn’t forced her to do anything, she was the one making all the advances, he just didn’t stop her.

**NATE**

Nate wanted this, he has always wanted Rue in this way; Before he may have forced himself on her, been the more dominant of the two as he was with Maddy. This was different, he honestly didn’t respect Maddy when it came to sex, he knew that she learned everything from studying fucking porn videos, she had no originality; Honestly, the sex got to be pretty boring with her doing the same thing every time. This wasn’t to insult Maddy, she was very fucking hot, and the sex felt great with her, somehow with Rue though, he didn’t feel that he had to force anything. In fact, she pushed him onto the bed after initiating yet another unexpected kiss right after revealing that Lexi may be fucking dead. He guessed this was her way of coping with the loss? Screwing the absolute worst person to be around; Fuck therapy, just do the exact opposite of what you’re supposed to apparently. Nate’s face was growing red, the heat was practically exuding off his chest, when she placed her hand confidently against him, he almost grunted. This was far hotter than he ever imagined, she was practically panting with anticipation. This felt dirty, this felt wrong, they shouldn’t be doing this… and yet it made it just that much hotter. She had already ripped off her hoodie, the same hoodie he imagined stripping away from her for days on end; He had a lot of time on his hands and his hands were certainly being put to work. Next came the pants, she haphazardly threw on some sweatpants before she came over so it wasn’t too difficult to remove them. Other than the abnormally confusing knot she managed to tie, they came off just as the hoodie did, like they didn’t belong on her in the first place.

**RUE**

Rue was beginning to get nervous; she was ACTUALLY doing this; her sweatpants came off almost as easy as the hoodie and she wasn’t wearing much else. For some reason she felt it was necessary to go over in her lacy black underwear, it’s almost like she planned this since the beginning. He was reaching for his shirt now, like he just now realized that this was going to happen, his abs practically showed through his shirt. He was unbelievably hot at this moment, she couldn’t get enough of him, pressing her lips into his, clashing tongues like they were in an eternal struggle for love. They couldn’t get enough of each other, it was like they already started, and yet they hadn’t. They both knew they were going to regret this later, but she wasn’t sure if she could survive without Lexi, so she might as well live this like it was it last day on earth. She began tracing her fingers across his chest, his stomach, his face contorted in looks that could only be described as “painfully horny”. She was edging him so closely, yet she hadn’t even begun to take his pants off yet. She wanted to, but for some reason she was the sexy top tonight, who was in complete control of everything.

**NATE**

He wasn’t sure how she was so confident in herself, but goddamn was it sexy; He finally succumbed to his feelings for her, letting himself enjoy maybe even a few hours (he wasn’t quite sure how long this would last). He was scared almost, the girl was taller sure but she was still this fragile little thing, he was afraid she might break.

**RUE:**

_I won’t break, so just fucking do it already_

Clearly she read his mind, or it was just that obvious on his face, he was eager yet scared at the same time. He knew that doing this would commit to his feelings, he couldn’t come back from this and neither could she; He takes his jeans off, as well as his underwear. Her eyes widen, she didn’t realize he was so well endowed, she almost laughed in disbelief.

**NATE:**

_What? What’s funny about this?_

**RUE:**

_It’s not you, I just can’t believe you’re as big as Maddy said you were_

He couldn’t help but laugh too, this was so fucking strange, never in a million years did he expect Rue fucking Bennett to compliment the size of his dick. His nerves were so high that he struggled to get it up, she noticed his problem and reached down to touch him. Her hands were surprisingly warm, he jumped back but she tugged back, that fucking hurt. If he didn’t know any better he would’ve thought that she was an expert in hand jobs because her hands were like fucking magic, any sense of nervousness melted away in ecstasy, he bent down to kiss her as she worked her charm. These two were doing something dirty, something they knew would haunt them for the rest of their lives, but neither knew if they would survive much longer so what was the point? He reached down as well, slipping his fingers past her underwear and into her, she let out a little gasp.

**NATE:**

_Did I hurt you? You’re not a virgin are you?_

**RUE:**

_No you idiot, don’t stop_

**NATE:**

_No to which question?_

**RUE:**

_You’re hotter when you’re quiet you know that right?_

His cheeks lit up red and he obliged, silencing his questions; He followed that by continuing the movement of his fingers. She thanked him by kissing him even harder, he could feel in multiple places just how much she enjoyed what he was doing. That wasn’t to say he wasn’t enjoying himself, it actually felt like he was close already, he hadn’t even gotten to the main event yet. Time was an illusion right now, it didn’t matter that Lexi might be dead, it didn’t matter that Nate planned on killing himself the next room over; None of these things mattered, because they were completely enthralled with one another. He never thought he would feel such a strong emotion from something as primitive as sex, but he felt as if his heart might explode; Not from the sexual arousal, but from the fact that he felt he had to stay in this moment and never leave it. Nate was afraid that no matter what else happened in his life, this would be his highest and his lowest point, he had never felt such compassion for her, such hatred for himself. He could read the same feeling off her, despite the bright red hue that shaped her cheeks, Rue was as sick with herself as she was enjoying it.

**RUE**

It was as if all 17 years of Rue’s sexual fantasies had all joined forces and taken control of her body, she wasn’t in control here, her urges were, she wanted this more than anything while wanting nothing to do with it at the same time. Despite how amazing this felt, to have his fingers… to feel such ecstasy… she wasn’t aware that a guy could do this well. To be fair her only other experience was when she was stoned off her ass with a limp dick freshmen, but goddamn was this night and day. Nate clearly knew what he was doing, she went along with it the best she could, she supposed she was to be considered a power bottom because she was certainly not completely submissive. She managed to pull him even closer to her, within centimeters of one another, and whispered into his ear:

**RUE:**

_Put it in_

Those three words turned him into a man, they empowered him with the lust of a god: So of course he obliged. She gasped as soon as it broke through, music to Nate’s ears, it only urged him to go further. She couldn’t believe she was doing this; she was fully committed to throwing her life away; To throwing everything good in her life away. What did it matter? She was a piece of shit; she didn’t deserve anything good, she deserved to rot for what she has done… so why not just fully commit? She was enjoying this far more than she wanted, no, her mind wanted this, she blanked out every coherent thought, focusing on the fact that she was fucking Nate Jacobs… she was going to for the next 30 minutes actually.

**30 MINUTES LATER…**

**RUE**

The past 30 minutes had to have been some of the best and worst 30 minutes of her entire life. Her body enjoyed every moment of it, because of course it did; However Rue’s mind raced with guilt, she regretted doing this more than she did when she did drugs, it was like every molecule in her body just screamed “kill me”. When they finished their wild display of passion, the room went silent, despite how they felt physically; Mentally the two felt the worst they ever had, regret was an understatement. There was this awkward silence between them, like neither of them dared move because if they did, their shitty lives would return to them and they would have to face the music.

**NATE:**

_That was… that was great_

As soon as those words spilled out of his mouth, Nate began to cry, he cried because he knew that he had ruined Rue Bennett; For once she couldn’t blame herself for this one, he pursued her and reminded her of his existence. His existence was enough to create problems, that’s why he had to go, he tried to be somebody he couldn’t: A good guy. No matter how much he fought his terrible past, it managed to catch up to him and burn everything to the ground. Rue hadn’t noticed his tears until they became audible

**RUE:**

_Maddy was in the accident too_

**NATE:**

_WHAT?!_

That was not meant to come out of Rue’s mouth, she didn’t know when that was going to come out but why did it have to now?

**RUE:**

_Maddy was driving Lexi somewhere when they got into the accident, Fez was the one who found them… he said Lexi took the front of it so I just assumed…_

Nate was too much in shock to be mad at her, he didn’t understand what urged her to come to his hotel room rather than the hospital; But he didn’t think any of the decisions they all have made were exactly sound.

**NATE:**

_Well put your clothes back on… we gotta head to the hospital… Fez never said she was dead right?_

Rue looked at him with confusion

**RUE:**

_Who? Maddy? I said—_

**NATE:**

_Fucking Lexi, he never said EITHER of them were dead right?_

She nodded

**NATE:**

_Then there’s still a chance they’re alive, look what happened tonight can either stay between us or you can tell whoever you want. To be completely honest I don’t think I could care anymore about what others think about me, if you need to fess up to anything then please don’t make me be the reason you don’t_

The look Nate gave Rue, it reminded her of her dying father; The look of giving up, of succumbing to everything. She wasn’t sure exactly what that meant, but judging by everything that happened tonight, and all that still might happen… she chose to leave it be.

**RUE:**

_We’ll figure that all out later, I’m sorry for not saying anything before, I guess we got a little carried away_

Nate managed a weak laugh from that, he was going to miss this; But he understood that it could never happen again, he wasn’t sure if she should even look at a man like him ever again. He grabs his keys right as she slips her clothes back on and they run out the door into his truck.

**RUE(V.O):**

_That night was the worst night of our lives, I don’t think I could have fucked up any worse if I tried… you’re all caught up now, for real this time, I just hope you can still look at me the same once all is said and done_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes... i know it wasn't complete smut, if you guys really want that please let me know and i'll write it, maybe.


	18. Epilogue Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Moments after the accident, Rue and Nate rush to the hospital

**INT-HOSPITAL-NIGHT**

**RUE(V.O):**

_So here we are, the final stretch of my quartet of stories, I know absolutely nothing about what is going to happen: Could it end happily? Would I be selfish to wish that it would?_

Rue and Nate both enter the hospital, still shaking off the events that hadn’t occurred even 2 hours ago. They’re both visibly fucked up, the night nurse looks the both of them up and down, half expecting them to admit themselves.

**RUE:**

_Was a girl by the name of Lexi Howard brought into your ER within the last 2 hours?_

The woman looks at her with annoyance, it was 2 AM in the morning and she did not feel like doing anything… but the girl looked heartbroken so the least she could do was hopefully ease her troubles.

**NURSE:**

_Looks like a 17-year-old girl named Lexi Howard was brought in for a car accident, she’s currently in the ICU for trauma received during the crash._

Nate looked down towards Rue, expecting excitement, he was severely disappointed to see the exact opposite. Rue looked like SHE had just been in a car accident, like the nurse had just run her over repeatedly.

**RUE(V.O):**

_Sh-she’s alive? Fez said she was dead… no… he said she probably wouldn’t make it… Fez must be a shitty judge when it comes to being dead or alive. What am I going to do? What could I say? Should I even try?_

**RUE:**

_Um- so she’s alive is what you’re telling me?_

The nurse looked at her, confused

**NURSE:**

_Yes she’s in the ICU as I said, her mother and sister are right over there actually_

The nurse points at an obviously grief-stricken Cassie and Mrs. Howard before the nurse can even turn her head back towards the two, Rue is racing towards them. Nate is left alone, unsure if he should follow her, he turns back to the nurse

**NATE:**

_Umm, I know you’ve already helped a lot but could you check another name for me?_

The nurse looked unsurprised

**NURSE:**

_What’s their name?_

Nate wasn’t sure if he wanted to know, if he had the strength to ask after what he had just done, after what THEY had done.

Rue ran over to Cassie and Mrs. Howard; it hadn’t even dawned on her that they would be there. She was incredibly nervous, how could she not? If either of them learnt of Rue’s infidelity she was good as dead.

**RUE:**

_Hey, how is she?_

Cassie was devastated, this was her little sister after all

**CASSIE:**

_The doctor said she woke up for a few minutes, she couldn’t remember anything about what had happened, she’s asleep now but…_

**MRS. HOWARD:**

_But the doctor doesn’t know if she has any permanent brain damage, she’s going to live though so don’t worry too much._

Rue wasn’t sure if this was good news or not, on one hand: The love of her life had survived a near fatal car accident, on the other: She just fucked Nate Jacobs with the belief that Lexi was dead.

**RUE (V.O):**

_I still don’t know if I did that because Lexi “died” or because I wanted it… maybe it was both? Am I a terrible person? Of course I am the list is only growing by the day… this however, this is unforgiveable_

Rue tried her best to process all of this, she wasn’t sure if she deserved to even be here right now, how she could just act like she hadn’t participated in the high school equivalent of a fucking war crime. The best she could muster was a head shake, making it clear that she was hiding something; Cassie was the only of the two to notice. She didn’t dare confront Rue right now about it, her sister was in the hospital and her mother was barely hanging on. It was obvious since they were little that Lexi was neglected by their mother, maybe it was part in the fact that Lexi favored their father, maybe it was the alcohol; Cassie tried her best to replace the warmth that their mother should have provided.

**CASSIE:**

_They said we’ll be able to see her soon if you want to join us_

Rue looked up at Cassie with guilt, if only for a second, then immediately tried to hide it; She tried to speak but it felt as if something got stuck in her throat.

**RUE:**

_Of course I want to see her, gotta make sure she remembers her partner in crime_

Rue let a weak smile out, it could’ve been excused due to the traumatic circumstances, but Cassie knew that look; It was the same look she gave Mckay right after she almost cheated on him with Daniel. Again she wasn’t going to say anything yet, there was already too much going on tonight, she just hoped her little sister would be ok, she had to be. Rue surveyed the room and noticed the absence of a very tall person

**RUE:**

_Did you see where Nate went?_

Cassie looked around and shook her head

**CASSIE:**

_He was talking to that nurse, did you two come together?_

Rue’s heart skipped a beat

**RUE:**

_Y-yeah we ran into each other because he heard about Maddy, he said it would be faster if I let him drive… Did she survive?_

The look on Cassie’s face scared Rue

**CASSIE:**

_Yea, yea she did…_

That was awfully sad sounding, almost as if… no it couldn’t be

**INT-MADDY’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Nate was terrified to walk into Maddy’s hospital room: The nurse had told him where she was and the extent of her injuries… he wasn’t sure he could stomach it. She was currently sobbing into her pillow, in a half-lit depressing excuse of a room; If Nate had been there sooner he would have made sure she had been taken care of. He wasn’t sure if he had the courage to talk to her, to see her like this, he had seen her cry before; Amidst their many fights, the majority of them resulted in one or both of them crying, however this was different.

**NATE:**

_Hey Maddy_

That was all he could muster? After everything he wasn’t sure if he could speak to her at all, she opened her eyes, she wasn’t surprised to see him.

**MADDY:  
** _Where have you been? The doctor said you just got here_

She wasn’t yelling at him; he wasn’t sure anything more than a hoarse exhale was possible for either of them

**NATE:**

_I-I was with Rue… she told me about what happened and…_

Maddy was growing suspicious

**MADDY:**

_And? What did you two fuck or something?_

She meant that as a sick joke but the startled look on his face made her feel sick

**NATE:**

_We got carried away and… and we lost track of time, it was an accident Maddy I swear_

Now she was growing angry

**MADDY:**

_So while I and Lexi almost fucking died… WHILE OUR KID DIED, you two thought it would be the perfect opportunity to fuck?_

She hit it right on the head, there was no excusing anything he did…

**NATE:**

_She told me Lexi died, I knew you were out with her for the day because I checked your instagram but… It didn’t dawn on me that you were in the accident until after.._

**MADDY:**

_Until you two were finished? Only then you thought that maybe I was hurt too Nate? Maybe your unborn child?_

**NATE:**

_Well I—_

**MADDY:**

_Well it’s too fucking late Nate, He’s dead, I wish I was too because now I’m stuck on the same planet as you, I can never escape you Nate_

**NATE:**

_What does that mean? I didn’t cause this_

**MADDY:**

_The guy who hit us… his name was Darian: Ring any bells?_

Darian? The name sounded vaguely familiar… he was on the football team with Nate and McKay, he was the backup QB actually. What would have caused Darian to do this? Nate hadn’t ever screwed him over; he was one of few who hadn’t been.

**NATE:**

_Yea he was the backup QB last year, he’s a senior this year, took over for me once I finished… I didn’t have any beef with him though_

Maddy didn’t buy it

**MADDY:**

_Well clearly you did fucking something because look at where he put us! What am I supposed to do Nate? I have nothing now!_

Nate knew in that moment what his role was to be for now on, he needed to be there for Maddy, he needed to support her now as he was; He wasn’t the cruel manipulative Nate she feared, at least he hoped not. Before she could begin crying again Nate rushes to her side, hugging her tightly. She holds onto him so tightly even he begins to hurt, but it doesn’t matter, Nate would never leave Maddy again… he couldn’t.

**NATE:**

_I love you Maddy, I struggled for a while with how I feel, I was afraid I hurt you too deeply… hell maybe I have, I just hope I can be there for you now. Just know, I will never hurt you again Maddy, that is a promise._

Maddy looked up at him with tear-filled eyes, except behind those tears was an ounce of hope, hoping that he was telling the truth. Maddy had nobody else, as tragic as this was, she was glad to be alive.

**MADDY:**

_I… I love you too Nate, I’m so happy you’re here before my mom can start freaking out_

Nate laughed weakly, he tries to back away but she holds him even tighter somehow, he decides to stay where he is, to live in this moment. Maybe in a few years they can actually start a family, Nate wasn’t sure where they would be, but he was sure that they would be together… no matter what.

**INT-LEXI’S ROOM-NIGHT**

After a few hours of pacing and waiting, the nurses finally let Rue, Cassie, and Mrs. Howard into Lexi’s room. The small girl was made even smaller by a mountain of hospital covers and padding, she had a bandage wrapped around her head. She was breathing on her own thankfully, she was a site for sore eyes. Rue was devastated, not even 2 hours ago she thought Lexi was dead, she… she made some mistakes, she wasn’t sure if she could ever live up to it. Cassie and her mother both take seats next to Lexi, their mother holding onto her hand. The contact manages to stir Lexi from her sleep, her eyes take a few seconds to adjust, its clear this is the first time she’s come to. Her eyes are noticeably vacant, where there was normally warmth is now replaced with an empty stare into Rue’s emotional frame.

**RUE:**

_He-hey Lex, how are you feeling?_

It takes Lexi a few seconds to process this words, how was she feeling?

**LEXI:**

_Like I just got hit by a car… What are you all doing here? Why am I here anyways?_

The doctors warned them of this, Lexi was experiencing short term memory loss, nothing too major, they theorized she may have forgotten the last week or so, especially the incident that caused the injury.

**MRS. HOWARD:**

_Well Lex, you see… you actually were hit by a car, you and Maddy_

Lexi’s eye’s lit up in surprise

**LEXI:**

_What? I would remember being hit by a car mom… Is Maddy ok?_

Rue should’ve been crying by now; she wasn’t sure how she was holding up with everything that was happening; Maybe her body finally had enough and was shutting down. It was only fair, she treated it like shit for the most of her life so.

**RUE:**

_She’s alive thankfully… but…_

**LEXI:**

_But what Rue?_

Rue wasn’t sure how she could put this into words, it was such a shock

**RUE:**

_Maddy lost the baby, the impact of the crash and the stress of it all, he didn’t make it_

Tears began to form in Lexi’s eyes

**LEXI:**

_Noo, please tell me you’re joking Rue_

She looks towards her sister and mother, hoping they could reassure her, their faces tell a completely different story, its true.

**LEXI:**

_Oh my god, I can’t believe it…_

Lexi begins to breakdown, the small barrier holding back tears breaks open, resulting in a flood of pain and sadness. This finally causes Rue to cry herself, the catalyst to relieve just a small amount of the tension Rue felt. Before she can even stop herself, Rue runs out of the room hyperventilating, trying to catch any form of air. She slams into a wall and sinks down, holding her head into her knees.

**RUE (V.O):**

_I can’t do this anymore; I can’t lie to Lexi… Why couldn’t it have been me in that accident? Why couldn’t I be the one that was punished? Lexi doesn’t deserve me, she deserves someone who doesn’t give up on her, that doesn’t fucking cheat on her… Why does everybody I love end up getting hurt, and I always end up free?_

Before Rue can continue her self-loathing, Cassie exits the room and confronts Rue

**CASSIE:**

_Rue… did you fuck Nate?_

This was going to be a very fun conversation

**RUE (V.O):**

_Shit_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a year since i've started this fun little story, and it's almost over. I hope you all have enjoyed reading as much as I have writing it.


	19. Epilogue Part 2: The End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All good things must come to end... but will a good ending be in sight for these two lovers?

**INT-HOSPITAL-NIGHT**

**RUE (V.O):**

_How the hell do you answer a question like that? I can’t just outright admit to it can I? Cassie will tell Lexi and everything will be over; That’s what I deserve though right? Rue the Ravenous: Taking and taking and never giving back, I should go down in the history books as the worst girlfriend ever. It’s been atleast 10 seconds of me just sitting here, I have to look really fucking stupid right now… come on brain say something!_

Rue’s stupefied gaze finally ends, she tries to formulate some last-minute lie in her head.

**RUE:**

_Yea… yea I did_

She very clearly failed, Cassie’s eyes lit up with shock and disappointment, she wanted to slap Rue right now, but what good would that cause?

**CASSIE:**

_So you’re telling me… while my little sister was almost killed in a car accident… when she NEEDED you the most; You fucking cheat on her? With all people I never thought you would stoop as low as Nate Jacobs._

Those last few words stung like venom, Rue had royally fucked up, there was no coming back from this. The two girls both knew where they stood at that moment: Cassie, the protector and Rue the destroyer.

**RUE (V.O):**

_Shit why did I say that? I’m usually a pretty good liar when I’m with my mom… no I can’t lie anymore, I have to come clean to it all. There’s only one more person to tell… I just need to not cry in front of Cassie because she might just rip me a new one._

Rue’s ill attempt to stay calm collapses, resulting in a teary mess, it was like Rue had just killed somebody, she might as well have. She didn’t recognize who she was anymore, the normal Rue had done some pretty fucked up things but this? Who even was she anymore? Had she been this way the entire time? Bouncing between relationships as much as she did drugs, becoming attached to any form of positive attention. She didn’t deserve Jules, she certainly didn’t deserve Lexi, and Nate? He didn’t deserve her. The angry glare coming from Cassie managed to stifle back the full-on meltdown Rue was having, she didn’t deserve to get upset this time… this was on her.

**CASSIE:**

_You’re going to tell her Rue, or I will_

**RUE:**

_I will Cass, but fuck she’s in the hospital… Can it wait until she gets out?_

As much as Cassie didn’t want to admit It, Rue had a point.

**CASSIE:**

_Fine, but I swear to god Rue if you don’t tell her, I’ll make sure you never see her again._

The truth was it hurt Cassie to have to do this, but her sister came first… always. Rue was a great friend to her but a terrible girlfriend to Lexi, that trumped all. She hoped that after Lexi found out, she would cast Rue away, she hoped she would come to her senses and realize just how fucked up it would be to stay with her. But a little part of her hoped they could sort this out… Lexi had never been this happy; The bad doesn’t outweigh the good in this situation but…

**CASSIE:**

_Now get out of here, don’t come back to the hospital, I’ll text you when she gets out_

Rue had nothing left to say, so she got up and left; Just as Cassie said, she had no right to be here right now. As she walked down the decrepit hospital, the only thing she could hear was the buzzing of the hospital lights, she looked through the empty rooms and remembered the time she woke up after overdosing, feeling so entirely alone. That was how she felt right now, alone, she had caused it herself this time, it somehow hurt worse.

**RUE (V.O):**

_I have no where to go right now, my moms going to be pissed that I took the car and that I’ve been out all night… probably thinks I’m doing drugs again or something._

She passes by the room Maddy’s in, shocked yet relieved to see Maddy was alive and asleep on Nate’s shoulder. He noticed her right away, the two are too awkward to exchange any words. The glance is all they need to know that it was probably best they avoided each other at all times. Any attraction Rue thought she had to him had faded, she just looked disappointed now and that stung Nate… he understood completely why she felt that way. Hell he was disgusted with himself, despite how good it felt then, he now felt shame, Maddy had cheated on Nate repeatedly and he had considered it; So the prospect that he had slept with somebody else didn’t bother her that much. The problem was with who it was, he had no business even talking to Rue after everything but she was Lexi’s… and he may have just ruined that. Rue passes by, knowing that may very well be the last time she see’s Nate or Maddy, it might be the last time she saw any of her so-called friends. After what she had done, she’d be amazed if even Kat spoke to her, the group was so tightly woven she wouldn’t be surprised if Cassie was on the phone telling everyone else. She just mindlessly stumbles out of the hospital, spaced out, full of regret.

**EXT-HOSPITAL-NIGHT**

**RUE (V.O):**

_Maybe I should just walk around for a bit… because if I come home im either going to get my ass beat or do drugs, so I can’t do that. Think, who’s the one person who wouldn’t hate me right now? Fuck I can’t call her…_

Rue knew there was only one person she could took to right now, the only person who wouldn’t judge Rue, no matter what. The problem was: That person was Jules, her first love and first heartbreak. She hadn’t spoken to Jules seriously since the night Rue and Lexi got together, they had casually spoken on and off, Rue didn’t want to completely forget her; But at the same time, with all of their issues and shit… it was hard to not make the conversation serious. Dialing her number, Rue hoped Jules wouldn’t pick up, because even if she wanted to talk to her, she didn’t know if she could. After the 2nd ring Jules picks up

**JULES:**

_Hey Rue! How are you?_

Jules’ cheery nature never failed to put a smile of Rue’s face, no matter how shitty she felt about herself.

**RUE:**

_Um.. hey Jules, do you have a minute because… because I really fucked up_

Jules could hear Rue struggling to hold back tears, something was clearly wrong

**JULES:**

_Yea I’m just laying in bed right now, do you want to come over?_

**RUE:**

_NO, no if I do that I might honestly break into tears… is it ok if we talk like this?_

**JULES:**

_Of course Rue, what happened?_

**RUE (V.O):**

_Long fucking story_

**RUE:**

_Well you know that me and Lexi have been together for almost 8 months now and I would never do anything to hurt her…_

Jules didn’t like where this was going but she had to keep listening

**RUE:**

_Well I really fucked up Jules, like really really bad_

**JULES:**

_What did you do Rue?_

Although she just admitted it to Cassie a few minutes ago, repeating this to Jules seemed infinitely more difficult. She wasn’t sure because it was their history together, or the fact that Jules too had an intimate relationship with some form of Nate. Hot tears began to form yet again, Rue was an emotional wreck.

**RUE:**

_Well, Lexi got into a car accident… Maddy too and I thought they had died Jules, I truly thought they died… But turns out they didn’t thankfully they’re both still alive. When I thought they were dead though, I found Nate and…_

**JULES:**

_And what?_

**RUE:**

_I-I slept with him, while I thought my girlfriend was dead I decided it was the perfect time to fuck Nate Jacobs_

The other end of the phone grew silent and Rue began to panic, did Jules hate her now too? Had she ruined every relationship with everyone she knew? After what seemed like an eternity Jules finally musters a response.

**JULES:**

_Did you tell her yet?_

**RUE:**

_No I told Cassie I would wait until Lexi got out of the hospital; she’s gone through so much as it is…_

**JULES:**

_No, you need to tell her right now Rue… because if you wait you won’t tell her, and you’ll continue on knowing you kept something like that from her._

Jules always managed to make sense; she always found a way around incredibly fucked situations. Rue hadn’t even realized she was hallway to her house so she quickly turned around, hoping she could get to Lexi in time.

**RUE:**

_She’s going to hate me Jules, I already ruined thing with you… I can’t do this again… I can’t_

Jules laughed lightly

**JULES:  
** _You didn’t ruin things between us Rue, we weren’t good for each other, your sobriety was dependent on me sure but I also never communicated to you; It goes both ways, I don’t regret a thing though, you shouldn’t either_

It felt like a weight had been lifted off of Rue’s heavy shoulders, there was still one more to go.

**RUE:**

_I just really don’t know if she can forgive me Jules, I mean this is literally the worst thing I could’ve done_

**JULES:**

_If you two are truly meant to be together, you’ll work things out, I promise_

Another awkward silence, Rue was almost back towards the hospital

**JULES:**

_One more thing Rue before you go…_

**RUE:**

_Yea?_

**JULES:**

_You’re a good person Rue, no matter what happens remember that_

It truly relieved Rue to hear that, no matter how she felt about herself, Jules managed to see the good in her.

**RUE:**

_Thank you Jules, I’m back at the hospital now so I’m going to go in… love you_

It brought a smile to Jules’ face to hear that again

**JULES:**

_Love you too Rue_

Rue hangs the phone up and reenters the hospital.

**INT-HOSPITAL-NIGHT**

The nurse that had helped her acknowledged her slightly, reading the room she decides to continue scribbling away at her crossword. Rue staggers back to Lexi’s room, feeling as if she was in a marathon. This seemed to be the longest walk of her life, she couldn’t think of what to say, how to phrase it; Could she be as blunt as she had been with Cassie and Jules? This time as she passed Maddy’s room, she received a death stare from the bed-ridden girl. It was clear Nate had told her everything and she did not look happy. Rue awkwardly waves towards them, not receiving one back she keeps going on her mission. She remembered that night, when her Lexi made pancakes, when they spent the whole night forgetting about their fucked-up lives; No matter what happened tonight, Rue could never forget the happiness she felt.

**INT-LEXI’S ROOM-NIGHT**

Rue enters the room terrified, thankfully Cassie and Mrs. Howard has stepped out, probably talking to a doctor. Lexi was sound asleep until Rue walked in, it was if a switch had been pulled because now Lexi was wide awake.

**LEXI:**

_Rue… where did you go? Cassie told me you had to go back home but I could tell she was lying._

Rue took the seat closest to Lexi; she couldn’t stand any longer anyways.

**RUE:**

_Yea I thought I was going to but… I need to tell you something Lexi_

**LEXI:**

_Yea any—_

**RUE:**

_But you need to hear my entire explanation first because you’re going to hate me in a few minutes_

Lexi looked at her with those damn eyes, melting away any sense of uneasiness.

**LEXI:**

_I could never hate you Rue_

**RUE (V.O):**

_Goddamnit Lexi why do you have to be so fucking cute_

**RUE:**

_So a few hours ago when you had your accident, Fez called me and told me what happened. That some kid named Darian run right into you guys and was freaking out over Maddy; Fez made it seem like you were dead_

Lexi’s eyes widened a bit when she heard the name Darian, Rue chose to ignore it for the moment.

**RUE:**

_And in my terrible judgement I decided to steal my moms car and drive out to the hospital… except I made a quick detour… to Nate’s hotel room. I went in there looking for comfort because well I thought you had fucking died… but I ended up… sleeping with him_

Lexi at first looked shocked, but it quickly waned over to a look of understanding

**LEXI:**

_Is that all?_

That was not the response Rue had expected, she would’ve thought she’d be screaming at her by now.

**RUE:**

_Yea Lex, I cheated on you… after having thought you were dead_

Again Lexi gave her a relatively blank expression

**LEXI:**

_You weren’t the only one Rue… I slept with Darian shortly after we had our fight._

**RUE (V.O):**

_WHAT_

**RUE:**

_What? How did you even know who he was?_

Out of the millions of possibilities that could’ve unraveled this night, Rue had never once even considered this as a reality.

**LEXI:**

_When we split for that week, I was really really angry… I wanted to get back at you for kissing Nate that day. So I took it one step further: I got Darian’s name and number from Maddy because I was really fucking spiteful. One thing led to another and I had a one-night stand with a guy I barely knew… I felt completely like shit afterwards, found out I’m a through and through lesbian though!_

Rue managed to laugh, somehow Lexi didn’t hate her.

**RUE:**

_So you’re not mad at me?_

**LEXI:**

_I told you Rue… I could never hate you, I’m more mad at myself for letting Nate get to you the way he did; I didn’t realize you were the desired woman of so many._

Rue lunged out her seat to hug Lexi, Jules was right, they really were meant for one another.

**LEXI:**

_You know that’s probably why he hit us… I practically ghosted him afterwards because he seemed a bit unstable, Maddy told me she had done the same thing so I guess I just tipped him over the edge._

Rue smiled brightly

**RUE:**

_I guess we just attract crazy… is it ok if we act like the past month never happened? Try to start fresh?_

**LEXI:**

_I would love nothing more Rue_

The two girls embraced each other whole-heartedly, basking in the new freedom they had granted each other. No matter what happened to them, the other would be there to pick up the pieces and support them. The two girls truly loved each other… and nothing was ever going to change that.

**RUE (V.O):**

_I guess this is the end of my fucked up story, I hope that I can live a mostly boring life with Lex… god knows we’ve been through a lot this past year. It was fun while It lasted but all good things come to an end so.. goodbye voice in my head… it was great._

**THE END… FOR REAL THIS TIME**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I truly has been fun to write this over the span of a year... I thought i was going to be done at 8 but it didn't sit well with me. So here we are, 19 chapters later and I have finally reached a point where I can call it quits. That doesn't mean im done writing, I will certainly be writing more eventually but Until Then.


End file.
